Coworker Blabberfmouth Jim
Coworkers come
Coworkers go
Coworkers work fast
Coworkers work slow
We know less than nothing about them
Unless you work with blabbermouth Jim.
He talks all day long about nothing but him.
He has had six wives.
They are long gone he said.
Some thought they had all gotten sick.
Others thought they were all dead.
Most of them ran off to get away from him.
This tidbit was told to me by his quiet cousin Little Slim
I know a secret Neely told me, no lie.
Don’t tell me, I cautioned her. It could make you die.
She followed me around all that day and the next.
I gave her the cootchie eye, and a brave genuflex.
She would not leave me alone, she wanted to tell.
I told her she’d better not, for blabbermouths don’t sell.
She will not have another friend if she banters this secret about.
She was bursting to tell me, and soon she did shout.
The secret as hard as she could, which was to the treetops.
I could not make her stop; she was flatly out of all stops.
The secret flew into the window of every neighbor on the block.
Her parents were aghast; they might as well not had a lock.
Now everyone knows what goes on in her house.
She has been called a snitch, a blabbermouth and a louse.
I know I should take some of the blame, but I can’t, not really.
It’s not my fault she cannot hold a secret, my young Cousin Neely.
Twitter hurt Donald Trump's feelings
Whilst Facebook questioned his dealings
But you ought to know
In Hell there IS snow
According to Donald Trump's squealings
Sometimes my big blabber mouth gets me into hot water
Look at the ugly girl over there, looks a lot like your daughter
Oops! She has a nice smile
I'd recognize her from a mile
Well it's been nice knowing you, but get a look at that honker
Never know what's coming out of my mouth
Was once in a store in Cape Cod
Some lady clumsily knocked over a stand
Blurted out, “Look what you've done, my god!”
In an elevator in the heart of downtown Toronto
A lady hit the button for the second floor
I blurted out, “That's only one floor up,”
“could've walked up and got there before!”
Being a good sport, said “What! Burn a calorie?”
“Are you outta your cotton-pickin' mind?”
I thanked her and wished her a very good night
Happy I didn't end up on my behind
Never know what's coming out of my mouth
Had a few not too pleasant adventures
Like the time starting out a nervous young teller
Said to a lady, “may I help you, SIR!”
Really gotta learn to keep my trap shut
Fortunate to have survived this long
It's better to mumble and drool like an idiot
Or dance and sing children's songs!
© Jack Ellison 2013