Best Vicks Poems
As I recall it was December
When a blizzard closed down O’Hare
I was sick of northern winters
While the sun was shining south somewhere
I remembered in a magazine
Pictures of a tropic scene
In the sunny Caribbean
So, I called my friendly travel agent
Send me somewhere it's hot
When I asked her for suggestions
She said "Antigua, maybe Montserrat
I replied, "I just don't know"
"just as long as there isn't snow"
She just laughed, "when can you go?"
Quit my job and sold my car on Friday
Bought a video on water sports
Gave up suits and sweaters all to goodwill
Shopped for sandals, found some neon shorts
All my friends said "Dave, you're nuts"
Trader Vicks sells coconuts
Seems to us you're in a rut
At the airport, all the seats were taken
Travelers were sitting on the floor
When I heard a voice behind me
"Sir, there's always room for more
I think I saw you in the parking lot
Ten degrees and she still looked hot
Cupid aimed and took his shot
What can you say to an unknown lady
And be politically correct
If you can't improve on silence
You risk showing disrespect
"excuse me please but I’d like to know
How a flower blooms in snow"
She just smiled and said "hello"
The vicks
Johnson is me poor old name,
Brisbane town is where I’m staying,
Had 100 jobs I’m saying,
A some times Diversional Therapist.
(entertain the old n decrepid)
Tried burying for half a week,
Wouldn’t let me smile, or squeak,
Drove a council bus,
punched out a few,
Who’d fight, no fuss.
Bouncer in the Valley,
Loved the chicks,
Woke up in strange beds with hicks
Accidently used the vicks,
Talk about the ring of fire?
Don Johnson 21-july-11
tracie edwards
Contest Name Getting to know you
Cuddling in soft blankets
feeling cherished
adding Vicks
which brings me extra comfort
and childhood memories
I pick up my warm mug
filled with hot chocolate
overshadowed by the large
melted marshmallow
floating all over the top
Life is grand!
I TRULY COME FROM “ A RARE BREED “
I am a woman who can follow, but I normally choose to lead.
For I am a phenomenal woman, Yesss indeed, I am a Rare Breed.
I wear many Hats and can be whatever it is you want or need me to be.
Never invisible, deliberate in all I do, in the open for all eyes to see!
I can be your Greatest Lover, or we can be the best-est of friends.
But screw me over and I can be your worst nightmare till the bitter end.
I am a woman that can encourage you and sweep you off your feet. But I can also be that woman that will cut you while you sleep.
I am that Diva with a smile, women seem to envy, while others just plain hate. Cause I can get “Turn-t Up”, have fun, and still be the lady who leaves with your Date!
I'm that soothing voice you hear when you come home after a long day all stressed.
With a hot bath, ready to rub you down, curl your toes, roll you over and let you rest.
If you get sick? I’ll nurse you back to health with some nice old fashion Chicken Soup. Serve ya Tea with honey, Rub Vicks on your chest, and handle the house all while you Re-coup.
I have no problem allowing a Man to be a Man, but this “All Men” must 1st Understand… A needy woman I am Not! I just desire the comforts of a Real Man. A man with a TRUE LIFE PLAN.
At times you’ll hear me Cussin, Fussin, R e a d i n g Folk and even throwing Fits.
Yet I still handle my Bizz! …. Cuzz Baby??? I am A L L L that and Bowl of GRITS!
But the rest of the times, I’m Calm, Patient and generally very Sweet. Always Grateful for God and Family, cause with them I know I Can’t be Beat!
Christmas Panic at the Pole
With only 12 days before Christmas,
Santa‘s concerned with the weather report,
the sleigh has a major malfunction,
needs repair and the time’s running short.
All the elves have themselves in a panic,
their shifts running twenty-four seven,
their tired and stressed but are doing their best
with remaining days numbering 11.
The reindeer are poised and polished,
Santa conducts their inspection with praise,
with the flight plan officially filed,
they’re all set to depart in 10 days.
Rudolph is fighting a head cold
But Santa knows he’ll be fine,
Santa rubs him with Vicks, with a hot toddy mix
cause he has to be ready in 9.
Bad news from North Pole repair shop,
some parts for the sleigh might be late
and there’s no time for home delivery tonight
as the countdown continues to 8.
Mrs. Claus and her singing elves,
entertain in the hall till eleven,
she has to confess as she plays all requests,
she’ll be glad when its over in 7.
Santa’s caught double dipping the eggnog,
with 6 left he has gained one more pound
those cookies and chips have gone this hips
he’ll be lucky to get off the ground
Mrs. Clause coaxes Santa try on his suit
they look at each other with dread,
with 5 days to go, it’s three inches to tight,
she looks for a needle and thread.
Well, tragedy has been averted
the sleigh’s fixed and Rudolph’s alright
with only 4 days before Christmas is here
looks like everyone’s up for the flight!
The Elves throw a disco party
Santa’s soaking his feet instead
with 3 days to go what he wants most of all
is a good night’s sleep in his bed.
The North Pole workshop got buried
in a blizzard with 2 days to go,
Santa summoned the elves at 3am
to shovel 12 inches of snow.
The presents are loaded, the reindeers prance
Christmas eve is finally here
Ho Ho Ho Santa cries as he flies cross the sky
“MERRY CHRISTMAS and HAPPY NEW YEAR”
Liz Labadie -Reilly
Mirthful memories of stitches and axel grease,
Kennel Clubs and snicker doodles.
Memories like colors, collected on an artist’s palette,
Stirred with southpaw patience,
Finding her backward child upright,
On a cycle’s seat; in a hopeful heart.
She sprinkled her son with dust from a Turner’s apron,
Which was folded neatly behind a watercolor easel,
Beside a piece of curly maple, carved with care and honesty.
So strange the result of that old black hurst.
A harrowing childhood taught her to protect,
To find safety for her son; no more locked doors.
Scrapping wallpaper and a boot full of cola,
Kitters and critters, costumes and cross-hatching.
So many lessons for the care of those you love.
Vicks rub, vaporizers and hospital visits,
Waiting for hours for good Dr. Rhodes.
Truck seats and hugs before Basic Training,
Lunch dates at Wendy’s on top of Bridgeport Hill.
Concerns for character and a trip to the police station.
College apartments and Charleston summers.
Until the day he danced with her son,
On the day he was wed; without her,
That day would never have come.
I feel now the strokes of Monet,
And I thank the Breeze for my cradle,
And my view from the treetop,
Impressions from my past; gifts from my Mother.
The success of my love is rooted in her hands.
Vicks Mentholatum. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
I sometimes open the jar and stick my nose in for a little smell
Which turns into a big smell, a little on my nose, some around my
Neck, and finally I beg my husband to slather it on my back while
I saturate my chest with it.
This smell loves me, calms me, and nurtures me like no other.
I probably spent the first ten years of my life slathered like this,
It brings back memories of mother, warm cocoa, soft scarves, and books.
Nothing opens my soul up faster than Native American flute music. It brings
out my wolf wild side. I want to run to a cliff and howl at the moon. It takes
me instantly to Sedona vacations, turquoise jewelry, kachina dolls, bringing the
American Southwest into my heart, and healing the sad places.
Almost everything I see delights me – shiny things, natural things, new things. But the thing that makes my heart sing the fastest is the sight of my grandchildren. Any one of them. I have ten, and it does not matter which one is coming toward me. There is a surge of happiness that leaps through me in a boundless joyful way that cannot be described. It is a craziness that must be lived and felt.
Beans will be the death of me. My favorite tastes all include beans. It is a toss-up which one
I like the most – jalapeno peppers stirred in refried beans, barbequed beans, kidney beans, pork and beans, and ham and beans. I salivate when I think of any of these. It is a spontaneous reaction that I have never been able to quell. When I was a child we ate lots of beans, so maybe that is where this is coming from. I have no idea. But I know these are my favorite meals. I am a cheap date.
What do I not like to touch? The list is tiny. I am a tactile learner. To teach me, you have to let me grab it, shake it, spin it, toss it, catch it, and rub it. I touch wallpaper, woodwork, and metal file cabinets in offices. I touch ants, rocks, flowers, grasses. I hug trees. I hug people. I am a professional toucher.
Possibly my favorite touch is warm, sudsy bath water after a trying day. I immerse myself, washing off sadness and disappointment, thinking of the Vicks Mentholatum which I will slather on when I get out.
Written: July 27, 2018
Entered: My 5 Senses Contest Sponsor: Viv Wigley
I love smells
Vicks and lemon comforts me
Cinnamon roll and pine cone
Remind me of Christmas
Smells seduce me, entice me, delight me.
I use my sniffer to figure out the world.
Old Spice. Hello Daddy.
Sweet Honesty. My days of being young and cute.
Fresh paint. A new beginning.
Varnish. The one dresser I refinished.
Gasoline. Vanilla. Caramel. All with their own memories.
Parading around in my head, reminding me of days I thought I had lost.
The Dodgers are in LA.
How are you boys doing today?
The Giants moved to Frisco.
Is that something you did not know?
There is many a familiar face.
I have spent six years in this place.
Where do the police use mace?
Did we beat the Russians in the space race?
Yes, this is a filibuster.
Have you heard of George Armstrong Custer?
He and his men we must mourn.
They met their demise at the Little Big Horn.
Who is married to Elizabeth Taylor?
Where can I find a Vicks Inhaler?
You have heard of Norman Mailer.
He wrote the book “The Naked and the Dead”
With wine, do you prefer white or red?
How about a bottle of rose instead?
Which goes well with pizza and pepperoni?
What kind of sauce is good with macaroni?
I think you know where to find Macchu Picchu.
Those are excavated ruins in Peru.
The Incas lived in South America.
No longer do they rule in that area.
Well, I believe that is enough for your ear.
Do not worry if what I said was not clear.
As lawmakers, we must persevere.
Let us discuss serious business here.
This is how most of our elected officials spend their time in Congress
I always
put it around my nostrils,
I answer when she asks me
where I put my Vicks.
Then in my half-sleep
I notice how strange the word sounds,
"nostrils." Words not often said
wander in the woods without trails.
Something like nose,
I know that word even though it's
not every day. Nostrils, the appendage
feature, like the nomenclature of insect parts.
In my half-sleep about to slip
into dream my facetious mind
knows how linked
here on earth to parts of strange beasts.
When I was a kid, if I got a cut,
My mother would grab the glass vial
And slather a swath of no other stuff but
Mercurochrome; that was her style.
Inside of the bottle a thin tube of glass
Was for dipping and coating with goo.
Then you dabbed it on so that no germs would amass
And the medicine knew what to do.
Every household did stock it, like aspirin and Vicks
(VapoRub, used if we had a cold),
But the FDA sometimes gets wise and restricts
Certain products which stop being sold.
That’s the way things went down in Mercurochrome Land.
It’s been years since it’s legal to buy it;
Though its mercury content, we now understand,
Isn’t healthy, some still would deny it.
It’ surprising to me that what once was assumed
To be helpful can lose its cachet,
So perhaps with Purell use we all might be doomed
As our safeguards it withers away.
medication makes me sleepy
I have been congested for three weeks
Mucinex, Vicks and Benadryl have put me down for many naps.
Some days I have taken up to three of them.
This morning, I agreed to go to the bank at ten.
I woke up at 7:13 and decided to nap at 8:08.
At 9:47 my husband yelled “I AM GOING TO THE BANK!’
in one of those anger-aggressive ways.
He woke the dog and me both up.
I got dressed in three minutes.
I do not have to look prissy or even good to go to a bank.
At the bank the lady asked if I had my cell phone.
I told her there was not time.
My husband hustled me out of the house so fast.
Weird that she asked me about a phone anyway.
No one at the bank has ever asked me if I had my cell phone.
They were lucky I grabbed my identification at the last second.
My husband will probably tell me why when he gets to the car.
I am sitting here, writing up my tale of woe.
Chicken noodle soup fixes everything, I used to hear, from my mother.
I had tried everything but chicken noodle soup this week on my cold.
Cold pills, Vicks, and vitamins. Went through three boxes of tissues yesterday.
Finally, broke down and had the chicken noodle soup. Feel so much better!
Listen to your feelings, I used to hear from my father, who is in heaven.
My earth father, not THAT Father. He was so right; and it has worked well.
Feelings have kept me alive, feelings have helped me help others.
Feelings have steered me in the right path. Feelings, I am all about.
Mom was a big believer in Vicks too. We were slathered in it during the winter.
Vicks on our chests, our backs, the bottom of our feet, and in our noses.
I love the smell of Vicks; it makes me feel instantly better, making me young.
When I smell it, I become eight-years-old instantly, and I want more.
Old Spice was Dad’s smell. When I smell Old Spice, there he is.
I have a jacket of my dad’s. He has been gone eight years.
It does not smell like Old Spice, but it smells like my Dad.
I reach for it sometimes, and I know he is here.
Moms and Dads are funny things. You can never replace them,
And you can never fully get over them. But who would want to?
They are your first teachers, and your last teachers. They are yours.
Though you might share them with siblings, it does not feel like sharing.
Colored Memories Poetry Contest Sponsor: Craig Cornish Date: 8-28-2018
Some memories are pink, others are yellow. Some big as mountains, others petite, and gentle.
The harsh ones that hurt us the most are the ones that enter our minds when we are sad or mad.
These are best put into an imaginary box, tied with a variety of colored bows, and shoved down a river.
Visualizing this has helped some people to not experience their colors so hard. Be sure and notice the
Sun on your face, the happy singing birds, the chirping of happiness, and the calm you feel when the package disappears from your view, never to be picked up or examined again.
This will not work for everyone, but it might work for you.
Obviously, some memories have colored our souls for the rest of our lives – both good memories and bad ones.
If your grandma’s bedroom was lavender, and that is where you were comforted when you had croup,
With Vicks, or warm oatmeal, laced with brown sugar, bombarded by love, lavender might be your happy color, until something mean comes along in the form of lavender which changes things.
Try not to be mean, as you can make or break other people’s colors.
Colored Memories Poetry Contest Sponsor: Craig Cornish Date: 8-28-2018
Vicks Vapor Rub is my most favorite scent.
If it was tasty, I would eat it,
so it could seep out of my pores as I slept.
I love the menthol of it;
I love the comfort of it.
I love it up one side and down the other.
Vicks Vapor Rub reminds me of my childhood
My mom would rub this on our chests,
Our backs, our necks, nightly in the winter time.
Our furnace was always turned way down,
to save money, so Vicks Vapor Rub warmed us up.
It reminds me of oatmeal, and cigarette smoke
and other smells of my mother.