Best Telephone Number Poems

“Tamam Shud”



Handsome comes
as handsome goes

forgotten
not missed

lies waiting 
intestate 

a code
undeciphered 

Mystery in the end - 
far more interesting 

answers calling
something whispers:

"Death -
open gate ...

Come in"

(LadyLabyrinth / 2020)




"Spin Spin Sugar" / Sneaker Pimps
https://youtu.be/uGPdpWbg5bU




"Police found a book nearby
from which,
the piece of paper was torn - 
the works...

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Dear Santa,
As you may well know, 
it's tights and not stockings that are all the go.
So, with no stockings to hang on the bedstead, 
would a pair of my bloomers be OK instead?
I'll sew up the legs so that there is more space, 
can't have...

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Marquee gave me a choice.  "What would I rather be, a better writer, or to be  able to use my  computer?" They notified me.

Their telephone number is 1-800-562-1502 and they are open Monday through Saturday. They are closed on Sundays. if you...

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Note 
TO = telephone operator
Self = myself speaking
  



TO:      You have just reached Bedlam Associates Incorporations Ltd.
             Our telephone number is 999999ad infinitum but a 9 is...

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"Write your dreams," Carolyn Kizer told us
in a long-ago poetry workshop in Paris.  I would 
like to, Yes, follow that instruction, but on wee-
hour trips (no pun intended), to the 'salle de bain' 
I describe as 'the patter of little feet,' I sit dazed,...

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The Poem For Every Female. 
(You are every Beautiful word ever thought.)


I Love You.


I love all females.
No female is ugly.
No female should ever feel lonely.
I am with you all; you are all in my heart.
This poem is my gift to you all, you shining stars.


I...

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I recently attended a speed dating service,
but I did not enter into it at all serious.
I went into this speed dating service strictly as a goof
and when it ended I was left with indisputable proof
of what my true presence and brutal honesty would do to...

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pleasure i  seek without you
pain i get from the thorns of curiosity
when i knock again, your blessing answers the door
i say nothing and leave to take a walk through the woods
i never look back and i quickly forget your name and telephone number
it is...

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Facebook fools you all
Why tell the world where you fall
I am going on holiday for a week or three
Come to my home and rob me, shall I leave you a key
My daughter attends school X and walks home alone each day
An open invitation to people...

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I hate robocalls!

Inxs of recorded messages   
transmitted automatically 
to my telephone number 
by automatic dialing device.

I turn off damn ringer,
and disassemble (carefully 
as disabling a time bomb) 
internal workings nevertheless...
telephone still buzzes
twenty four seven
eight days a week
automated telephone calls
digitally recorded message
perfectly spoken English

differentiation...

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got what he wanted at my expense.

Said crack fast talking
hacker and scammer
pulled figurative wool over my eyes
going incognito and speaking a clipped
English mien his disguise.

He appeared (rather sounded) genuine
after yours truly experienced computer snafu
(the Macbook Pro essentially hogtied
courtesy virus that disabled any activity)
even turning the...

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While idling away the precious minutes
tapping into the wide whirled web
a smattering of random words and phrases
(in an attempt to jump/kick start
pinteresting material to sink figurative teeth),
thoughts pinwheeled back decades ago,

when attention attuned to forfeited, languished,
squandered... college/university chums,
whose persona, dogma, charisma...
appealed to my contemplative,
introspective, perceptive......

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His two years old son
Needed treatment for stomach pain
But he had no money
His wife needed to pursue
Her BA course
He couldn't afford to
I can't help he would say
I must be happy with what I have
He would say to himself
Somewhat stoically


But his days were otherwise happy

Ferrying people...

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today I smoked a cheap cigar,
tainted sweet,
plastic tip,
differently.

sitting by the kitchen window,
i caught the smoke between
my lips,
through my nose,
smooooooooooooooke.

try to be profound when bills pile up,
you spend more time
counting the bills which outweigh the ideas
on how to pay them.

where to get the money?
how to get...

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Advice to Harvard Students.

if you pour boiling oil
on your babies head
wait until the oil price has gone down.

if you undress in a public toilet
you may meet Piers Morgan
or the police may join in.

if you steal a computer
you'll have to take it back in the morning
for...

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