Best Richard The Third Poems
I shalt ne'er be a famous bard such as William Shakespeare.
From mine pathetic poetical quill he hath naught to fear!
Mine immoral mot, "Where'er thou mayest be let thine water flow free",
I fear shalt ne'er compare to Bill's immortal line, "To be or not to be!"
"He hath eaten me out of house and home!" could be said of mine cat!
(Why could not I have conceived that line - all I can say is drat!)
"A horse! A horse! My kingdom for a horse!" cried Richard The Third!
(If I had said that, people would have deemed me quite absurd!)
"Brevity is the soul of wit!" and thus "This is the short and long of it!"
Alas, I shan't match wits with Willie so while I'm ahead I'd better quit!
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved
It was sometime during the 1940s George Orwell
wrote the acclaimed novel, Nineteen Eighty-Four,
a book exposing a societal condition of pure hell.
The policy of draconian control has never meant more
than it does now as political doublespeak takes place.
Greedy powermongers are guilty of leading lands to war
and hypocrisy runs rampant in government. It's a disgrace
to the office of Presidency that idiocy has gotten this far.
The nonsense of Tomfoolery is the tragic kind of behavior
by manipulative charlatans, narcissists who are in position
to claim they are uniting the world as peacemakers, saviors
when they should be imprisoned in the annals of Perdition.
Many people fear AI will soon have power to take control
but Trump, Putin and others make AI seem rather docile.
Bullies with followers who think they are gods, these A-holes
create mayhem and chaos, whose assholery is colossal!
Orwell also wrote Animal Farm, about totalitarianism trouble,
a stark warning during a time of global conflict and clashes.
Such turbulence exists inside Trump's disinformation bubble.
He must be stopped before the result is a world left in ashes.
"A horse... My kingdom for a horse," shouted Richard the Third.
He was a Lionhearted king, but Trump and Putin have no soul.
History will regard their transgressions as being cruelly absurd
for nothing good they've done will be worthy to praise or extol.
The Derbyshire flag has a cross of green
with a background of pale blue
green for the verdant leas and peaks
blue Derwent running through.
At the crux of the cross, a Tudor rose
fierce history it carries
Henry the seventh beat Richard the third
Lancaster and York houses married.
Combined, their roses red and white
for the house of Tudor of old
Derbyshire's rose, recently born,
resplendent in it's gold.
Consider yourself edified
in this poetic manner
for this may be the last time that
I write about a banner.
Viv Wigley
12th July
For contest 'tell us about your county state city flag', sponsored by Judy Konos
Amelia she loves to chat and tells an amusing story
But dear readers BEWARE – this one’s a little gory
She worked long hours at night as a barmaid
It was a job she loved and good wages she got paid
She’d had a busy day and her pits were a little whiffy
So she had a little bath – it would only take a jiffy
So into the bath Amelia got, she sank into the bubbles
But this was only the beginning of Amelia’s troubles
Amelia did a little fart but unfortunately followed through
And in the bath was floating a little bit of poo
Amelia got out quickly and left the bath to drain
But unbeknown to her the turd it did remain
She got dressed and ready to go - she had to get her lift
To the pub she loved to work in she always enjoyed her shift
With the customers Amelia was always a big hit
She didn’t let on her secret that in the bath she’d done a little poop*
But it was a Wednesday night and a quiz was on this day
Amelia she loved this challenge and she would always play
The final question stumped many people but they wanted to be the winner
Which barmaid crapped in the bath tonight and could they name the sinner?
The one in the white t-shirt some of the customers did shout
Amelia went as red as a beetroot- she couldn’t wait to get out
But the customers they did shout and cheer
And poor Amelia had to pour them another beer
Now Amelia no longer works in the bar
She works as a receptionist – she’s really come far
She loves her new job and always likes to talk
But to stop her following through now she always wears a cork.
· I had to change this from the S*** word as I know swearing is not allowed – but the expletive does make the poem flow better.
Jan Allison
19th March 2014
~submitted for contest Take 2 Free poetry contest sponsored by Nette Onclaud ~
- Unplaced in contest 'tickle my funny bone' sponsored by Francine Roberts ~
~ Please see notes about this poem ~
My kingdom for a horse he said
Yet Richard the Third we've not read
Though the play's assigned
Shakespeare’s such a grind
We'd sooner chill with Mister Ed
HOUR OF POWER
If I remember rightly, someone once said
Enough of all this farce, democracy is dead
So don’t let any of it mess with your head
In some democracies, a President is elected
But in others, it is a party that gets selected
And never should free choice be neglected
But big business will win the day, of course
Party donations from a questionable source
Private functions, a meal ticket to endorse
National elections offer gripping television
No joy, if the count is denied any revision
Is it really the people making the decision
It’s rights and laws and a struggling economy
Yet it all comes down to maths and Ptolemy
But unchanged since the death of bonhomie
Yet I do believe in Switzerland each quarter
For residents up mountains or by the water
It is a form of democracy that doesn’t falter
Whether really as superficial as favouritism
But much less so, if it is state communism
Yet it is cash in the pocket with capitalism
A constitutional monarchy does seem Ok
But nothing like those in a Shakespeare play
And Richard the Third finally lost it, I’d say
So, there will always be this societal stuff
And when politics feels more than enough
Just surviving each day can get very tough