Best Pretentious Poems

I
"Gotta job as a nanny!"
"Maybe they'll hire me as a butler"
"Butler and nanny always live
in close quarters"
She winks
He raises and eyebrow suggestively

II
"I love flirting with poets
so...
palpable"
"Indeed my dear, indeed.
We are a flirtatious, passionate creature"
"But we're also dramatists
adulterers
alcoholics
and prone to murder and suicide"
"Yes, some may look...

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Lush pretentious garden sculpts to be gleaned.
Fullness of repose with sweet quiet sound,
fruitful, and forbearance draw nature's ground.
The sensuous feel, oft seasons has seen.

Butterflies noiselessly stir round fragrant
sweet allure angel's tears; with airy grace
scatter elsewhere to perennial space.
Ants, beetles, and birds herald, spring vagrants.

Wind nimble...

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Boiling shells crack down hard upon raining rooftops
None doth any apparitional material cover upon her arrogant gift
She hast not laid down upon her last upstanding
Glass convails images of the inconceivable 
Throwing away the Sun in blackened sickness 
No guilt, no shame, 
Unfeeling the inevitable eternal...

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Being Pretentious
By: Tom Wright
7/11/2019

It seems some peoples nature is to be ostentatious,
Because God put on earth those of every kind.
While this type of person is apt to be fallacious,
When beyond my vision they’re off my mind.

“Sometimes those who don’t socialize much aren’t anti-social,
They just have...

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Big fool

Acts "cool"...

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Blackened cubes of naturality stomache across the pains of a million screaming faces
Crushed by the weight of two ton pound horsehell and drowned in the unthoughtfulness of the moon's cruel disregard towards the emotions of the ground-up grime of the Earth.
Her circular orbit brings punishment...

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Don’t you miss me?
Do u even think of me?
You're still my every thought, 
you're still my every breathe

I wish I didn't care so much
I sometimes wish
my feelings were numb
that I could ignore them

pretend they don't exist
pretend you don't exist
maybe it will be easier
maybe I wont...

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I am god. 
  
I have destroyed all that is evil, and all that is good. 
  
Remaining is the past. 
  
The past is so full of potential, don't you think? 
  
It retains your thoughts, your whims, your sins....

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Human nature is destructive,
But also very instructive.
You learn what you want from it,
You choose the path you wish to knit.

See the destruction around you,
Let that nature never dwell within you.
We are but microbes in a vast universe,
Thinking we move forward while in reverse.

We are specks...

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YEAH just walk away, Rene
I don’t need you anyway
to know if this was meant for YOU
you'll question in your mind.
I always thought that you were cool
until you made me out the fool
you clenched the doubt when you sold out
Pretending to be kind
Was I just blind...

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Question

Answer...

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Your so pretentious,
The repetition is endless-
And the conversation relentless;
Though my restraint is tremendous.

Trying to keep cool and collected-
But even I, will be affected.

I'm sick and tired of being falsely 
corrected;
I'm uninterested, in the fact that you feel 
offended,
Unprecedented-
Consider this the new me; reinvented.

-Carly Larkin...

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I shared my florid words 
about our torrid love 
with an ardent lover, 
who exclaimed propitiously 
that they were astonishing;
then solicitously, 
she asked me to elucidate,
how did this prestidigitation occur;  
from whence did I extricate
these words of exultation,
these harmonic chords of verbiage,
that resonated so...

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½ cup sass
1 tbsp eye roll
2 cups suprirotive 
1 cup white privilege 
½ tsp rudeness
1 brand new car, softened 
5 oz brand name clothing
A dash of allof, to taste 

Add all ingredients together, while whisking in misinformed news media. Mix thoroughly for pretentious....

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It’s closing in,
The harmonic melody,
It’s tone deliberately grim.

As a one-time melody, it is heard by all.
A familiar, yet unfamiliar ring.

For the majority - its tune is distance.
But like all those before, I can hear it-
I can hear it from deep within.

It’s seduction.
Always terribly well-advantaged,
Overpowering,
Never once...

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