Best Pork Poems

At the footbridge Sue was meeting her beau
(He was married to a woman called Flo)
Sue soon found out his deception
She dismembered his ********
For his love...

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Figs stuffed with proscuitto and mascarpone cheese,
a plate of bacon wrapped scallops and pineapple.
French onion soup is bound to please
or garlic steamed mussels with which...

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He served as a deacon in his church and was as pious as they come.
(But on the side, he sold whiskey from a thirty-gallon drum!)
He...

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Well, I see that Congress is proposin' another trillion dollar spree!
Those inept buffoons must think money grows upon a tree!
The treasury is crankin' out bales...

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I want to mingle
with the people of Walmart 
as they regally push 
their shopping carts
Eclectically dressed perfection
each a work of art
Camouflaged chic
or an old guy...

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It ain't the pork, it ain't the beans
It ain't the mustard on saltines
It ain't the redneck social scenes

I love about the south

It ain't the ice...

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My favorite President is yet to be
  He may well not go down in history
For he'll do what really needs to be done
 ...

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**“Those that respect the law and love sausage should watch neither being made.” – 
American Humorist/Author Mark Twain (real name Samuel Clemens) 



Prestigious lawmaking bodies...

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If I were a fly, I would take my place
In the halls of Congress where haste makes waste
     I’d buzz the...

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I am whatever you say I am 
currently I'm the eyes of the world
it's what they discovered when
daddy tied a pork chop around my neck...

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When I look at you
I lose control
I know I shouldn't
But I can't say no
Just a taste of sweetness
Upon my lips
Its belly fat and expanding hips

One...

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There was a fellow riding a certain train,
And he posted an unpopular refrain,
In it he said, the innocents are dead,
With politicians and voters to blame.

To...

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She plunks down a plate of egg rolls
Man, oh man, do these greasy pieces of heaven take tolls
On my heart, dear Mama
Shows me love with...

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The 'Undred an' Fifth is the greatest o' Britain,
They charge like the Royal Marines;
They'll shatter the shock, and they'll 'old like a rock,
On nothin' but...

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Tediously bored, Sir Drake
Prolonged afternoon of tea and cakes
Jam coats his chin with gooey paste
A beard of crumbs hangs from his face
His manner somewhat hard...

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