Best Neuman Poems

Unidentified extraterrestrial(s) willingly abducted me

As a divergence 
from the apocalyptical, dialectical, 
geomorphological, judgmatical, 
metaphorical, philosophical...,
I share an out of this 
(webbed wide) world,
light hearted anecdote...

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Oh euthanasia, death's sweet song,
your word so smoothly flows along.
I can no longer bear his pain;
my love and prayers were all in vain.

His eyes are...

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I

What if this life is a play,
and we the actors each day,
an insane play for sick and sadistic amusement.

II

Oh, then life would be nothing,
existence would...

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Peace is a steadfast, stable, quiet noise,
Not one of media’s favorite toys.

Peace is an easy, loving intention,
So news gives it barely any mention.

There is only...

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Hunger and hatred are daily, wrongly, sustained and fed.
Unjust and unfair ones create chaotic laws and discrimination.
Multitudes of people ignorantly choose to live from their...

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Vane glorious and absolutistic,
     though I defiantly,
     cavalierly, and blithely attest
Yukon bet your (laugh-in) sweet bippy
 ...

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nor any greed
from one suppurating marriage
 this guy wants to be freed
with no malice this cheap tricking
   super tramping wordsmith
 of inxs ac...

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My favorite president?
Can't tell you now
they've re-written history
and a mob with pitchforks
would be chasing me.

The terms of their herd immunity
let them rule with impunity
from within...

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Alice Neuman, the last human who could drive died
Spread rapidly on networked news platforms that never lied
To the twelve billion populous that could not
Because of...

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I, (and the missus)
     pleased as punch residing
     at this Schwenksville, Pennsylvania locale,
    ...

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Unsolicited feedback
across rock of ages woke
beguiling ghostly busty spectre
courtesy Marie-Antoinette,
(i.e. bride of France's arty choke
King Louis XVI) bespoke

let him eat cake, and (sic)
send back the...

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Unidentified flying object abducted yours truly,... 

a willing experimental subject 
to escape untenable married life.

Upon falling into a deep slumber, 
the following subconscious 
somnambulant scenario...

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LAVENDER LADY
She was my lavender lady;
Standing by the lake,
Gazing across the sky-blue water
At who-knows what in the distance.
She was the very essence of elegance.
Spurning the...

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I have a problem;
these animals keep digging
mammals moles, gophers

~

hole digging tunnels
Oh! Burrowers where’s your den
you’re not our friend

~

small animals holes
moles, voles, rats, chipmunks burrows
Complex tunnels...

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which prime mate affectionately called buttock blaster
alimentary explosion ofttimes causes global disaster
upon such gaseous debacle run for your life ever faster!

Yours truly (humorously dry husband)
can...

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