2009 Hyundai Sonata An Infuriating Rattletrap

Time and again finances stretched to breaking point crackle, pop, and snap 'curse Alfred E. Neuman smiles at yours truly (this luckless papa) with with his toothy gap haint even Abel nor Cain, nor I pull myself up courtesy frayed bootstrap dirt poor penniless deathtrap compliments countless many mashup mechanical mishap no need to repeat, nor recap, the litany against fickle finger of fate driving me into almshouse more loathsome versus caught amidst tsunami size whitecap, where quick demise accompanied by deafening air splitting thunderclap, whereby bolt of blinding lightning cleaves heavenly vault and (Friday January 3rd, 2020) instantaneously immense mick canonical jagged dagger blithely grasped courtesy Usain St Leo Bolt (yes Olympic runner - fastest man on Earth nonchalantly thwarts bajillion volt tickles hands of said marathoner analogous to wiretap blessedly before brilliant atmospheric electrical discharge fizzled in feebly limp attempt to extinguish "fake" charade, facade, and mockup i.e. mine burned out life of Riley (really) ernest and frank failed to zap (think) mortally - merely surface epidermis braised flesh, synonymous burned out, bedraggled banged up resembling an old and/or rickety vehicle, none other than our trusty heap Uriah (hit) to guess aforementioned oft money pit accursed said automobile.