Best Mavis Poems

Life without her
would never be the same
She was the loudest, proudest
most endearingly brash
sugar-sweet and pickle-sour
five-foot-two, force to be reckoned with
that anyone in Yell county had...

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Mavis was a party girl but a boor

   She's not welcome at parties anymore

      She causes people to...

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(a couple of war wives out the front of their houses)
(Please note *** is cigarette and aye is yes)

So whilst the golden fire displayed nature...

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Nineteen twenty-four and the wind was cold,
When men in uniform entered our town;
Forced us to leave in their boxcars,
Made us believe that it was for...

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'Neath this sod dwells Mavis who suffered many a phobia

Makes one wonder how she's handling claustrophobia...

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My wife has left me for an adverb.
I don't know which one it is!
Is it slowly,quickly, nearly?
Life should not be like a quiz.

She told me...

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No one knew that Mavis was a stripper,
They thought she worked at Tesco on the till.
Most folk knew her since she was a nipper,
No one...

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No one knew that Mavis was a stripper,
They thought she worked at Tesco on the till.
Most folk knew her since she was a nipper,
No one...

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Ron desperately wanted to have a girlfriend
He’d looked after his old mum right till the end
Ron was a tall and extremely attractive guy
Unfortunately poor Ron...

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There once was a songbird named Mavis Hood,

   Who yearned to be a star in Hollywood.

      'Twas a...

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Shopping bags


In a concrete building, there lives a man.
He has not moved in many days.
There comes a knocking upon his door,
And he returns to his...

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It was in the Barley Tavern, on a normal Friday night,
I’d ordered flatty tails and chips for tea, before I’m sitting down,
with a schooner full...

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The Trial.

 

Arthur, Sammy, Davis, Junior, Stevie Wonder, Bob, Mick, Sue, Carver. You are being charged with the partial demolition of a listed building. Endangering...

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Mavis swept the kitchen floor
     in the dark of ev'ning light,
Stopped to fold a cigarette
     near the...

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All I know of my namesake
   is a photograph
   
   a young attractive 
   smiling woman
 ...

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