Best If The Price Is Right Poems

get off my tv
you big fat waste of space man
you darling empty...

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You are a human being they told me, something you should treasure
But isn't a human being the only animal who kills for pleasure?
Man's inhumanity to...

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The worst of the bright-cracks have passed.
The tumultiest of the bucketiest of the rains have proved not to last.
The cat has chirp-purred his way into...

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A big welcome to you all who’ve travelled from afar
By plane by boat and motor car
For a reunion here in Hodson bay
It will be I’m...

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There’s a tale that I must tell
Of a heart that I knew quite well.
This heart dwelled within her chest
And had given its very best.

Love and...

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Political figures have a way of looking at things
And changing to gray what is black and white
Projecting an image of integrity
Then selling their mothers because...

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All I want for Christmas
Is my two front teeth
All my back teeth
A Mercedes or Bentley
A life time membership to Hugh Hefner's mansion
The rights to the...

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Human Organs Anyone

Early this morning, there was this dire warning over social media...
Of a van apprehended in Thailand filled with bodies of dead children..

There was...

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You call me baby
tell me
would you care
to spin my Wheel of Fortune?

If the Price is Right
would you come on down?

Maybe if you are lucky
you will...

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prices goin' up,
prices goin' down;
quit playin' with our pockets,
we're wearin' a funky frown!

every time the prices drop,
our hopes are ridin' high;
just when we think the...

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A DEMONIC DEMOCRACY

“We interrupt regularly scheduled programming to present the President”……
And yet he just keeps talking
No verbiage can he espouse that I would ever care...

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Baseball cards and hula hoops
  Baloney sandwich, Campbell’s soup

Howdy Doody and Mickey Mouse
  Mamie and Ike in the White House

American Bandstand, Rock 'n...

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My new striped sneakers might be cool
Or creepy, I can’t tell.
The price was right and socks or not,
They fit me very well.

With rounded toe and...

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Intelligence, it seems, is very expensive.
It makes you work to gain advantage.
It makes you pay to find success. 
It’s the law of supply and demand.
To...

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Asked an NPR journalist
of U.S. soldiers
damaged in Afghanistan
direct fire
for one hundred everydays,

"Was it worth it?"

"I can't answer that question."

She asks more hesitantly again
of another veteran,

"Was...

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