Best Humbug Poems

Bah! Humbug!  It’s that time of year;
I can’t understand the reason
why everyone is so full of cheer
just because it’s the Christmas season.

The traffic on the street is horrendous,
like a snail, moving at a slow crawl;
the shopping crowds tremendous,
no parking spaces at the mall.

The weather...

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Love’s better when you’re a beginner.
On Valentine’s Day, you’re a winner.
For the old married gal
It’s a day usual.
And you’re lucky to get a free dinner!


(For Francine Robert's "Valentine's Day Limerick" Contest)...

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Here we go again,
I’ll have to count to ten,
It’s Christmas time once more,
Christmas songs ‘n every store.

It’s bound to cost a mint
It’s gunna make me skint
And all for just one day
Please make it go away!

The wife’s all in a tizz
I’ve forgotten the Buck’s Fizz 
And...

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Ah, the glorious damned winter
and the inviting  
gray chill in the air.
I meander 
ever 
so
slowly 
past lawns
strewn 
with a cluttered array
of pagan snow zombies -
staring blankly,
as I obliterate pint-sized
snow angels 
failing to don halos
that could have easily been
brush stroked with 
da Vinci's golden teardrops.

(Impoverished...

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A Grinch in a hamlet of Whovilles

Stole credit cards, ringing up big bills

     Without checking price tags

     He murmured, “Bah, Scumbags”

For this is how grinches get their thrills!




*January 3, 2015...

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Ah yes, the joys of Christmas
Excuse me if, I seem a little listless
Just thinking about, all of the work
Turns my smile into a smirk

Carrying boxes, moving things around
That fake tree weighs a hundred pounds
Untangling lights, that came unwound
The headache caused is quite profound

Assemble the tree....

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If I could be that proverbial fly
I'd listen to Santa, wanna know why?
He checks that stupid list twice
He knows who's naughty or nice
Then I would know if he's passing me by...

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My father was beloved by all of us
But as the years passed, a bit of a scrooge
He soon became weary of all the fuss…

As children he would decorate a tree
And sing along with us in the church choir
Watch all of us open our gifts with...

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It was Valentine when I lost someone dear.  This poem is that reminiscence.
_____________________________________________________________________|
You and I were close.
Of course, we were.
You my big sister and I am Humbug.
Your nickname is Neece - Rosie in school.

I remember how you looked when I was only nine.
You were...

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I can’t stand another year of this
With the sales that start after summer’s bliss

And the songs that play round the clock each day
And the cock-eyed ice and snow

And the ho ho ho’s and the ringing bells
And the wasted time; makes me mad as hell

And crowds...

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Bah Humbug

Christmas comes but once a year,
With that I am in tune
But what makes me shake in fear
Are the cards in store arriving, during the month of June!

Trying to find a birthday or any general card
Can leave one feeling stressed and tense
For it makes choosing...

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The Holiday Season has come and gone.

   Bank balance for that spree is overdrawn.

      Now I'm feeling mighty glum.

         Since Sam wants a hefty sum,

     ...

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When you see sugarplum reindeer pulling,              a chocolate Santa  in a golden sleigh                  ...

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Now all throughout the land we hear it said,
'Humbug' rings the air both loud and clear,
As all throughout the land the bills are paid
With Christmas funds we held both close and dear;
Without them, Christmas joy we’d lose, I fear.
It’s time to send the funds you’ve...

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Illusion


It looks like what it is not
It's not always what it seems
All that glitters is not gold
Though it's summer, some feel cold

At the point dream meets reality
Reality may become an illusion
It leaves me blinded in oblivion
Until I say my opinion

We live in a world of...

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