Best Entertaining Poems
Jasper’s tale of woe, he tended to completely embellish,
Until these stories got worrisomely-gruesome, some even hellish.
Agnes, his wife and he were no longer invited to parties, yours or mine.
His wife was relieved, but Jasper, the story-embellisher started to whine.
Maybe we need to be a bit more entertaining, she suggested.
So they began several new hobbies, neither one of them contested.
They learned yoga, and karate, and Agnes learned to play the kazoo.
He learned roller blading and hopscotch, and brought home a digeridoo.
They realized suddenly, after learning all these things, and without a whit of sadness,
To want to be friends with the dull neighbors on their block was simply a silly madness.
The people who only eat lettuce
and nibble some nuts from a bowl,
are totally, utterly tiresome;
this ‘smugger-than-thou’ rigmarole.
But me? I am rather old fashioned
and faddy foods don’t pass my lips.
I’ll tell you one thing that I fancy,
a juicy great steak – and some chips.
I like a wee nip of the whisky,
a malt and I beg with no ice;
so will you just make it a double.
I don’t think I’d call it a vice.
I’m partial to wine from the Touraine,
a dry little number will do.
And then I enjoy a good claret,
all ancient and Premier Cru.
Now! Who are these creatures for supper?
Their surnames, I think I have missed.
Dear God! What a dreary young couple.
Shank goodnesh, I’ve got them both pished!
~
For Elliott Bowe's 'Drunken Pen' Competition.
A refreshing pitcher of lemonade.
Invited several old friends to drop in.
No bitter lemons among us.
Wordku: 5-7-5 words
AP: 3rd place 2026
LAWD GAD!!!
WEY YU SEY?
WI BOUT TO EXPERIENCE ANOTHER EPIDEMIC!
NO SAH!!!
WE CAAN TEK IT NO MORE
SO GWAAN BOUT YU BUSINESS
CAR-RONIA…CORONIA…COVID-19
WHATEVER YU BE!
WI HAVE 999 PROBLEMS BUT COVID-19 AINT ONE.
DAT DEADLY FRIEND, POVERTY
ALREADY A BOX WE LEFT,RIGHT AND CENTER
AND NOW YOU FEEL LIKE YOU WANT TO FINISH OFF THE JOB…
WELL,GWAAN BOUT YOU BUSINESS COVID-19
WE NUH WANT NONE OF YOU!
SHUT THE DOORS
SHUT THE WINDOWS
SHUT THE SHUTTERS
YU NUH SEE COVID-19 A TRY SNEAK IN?
COVID, YU FI REMEMBA DAT, “WHERE DOGS ARE NOT INVITED,BONES ARE NOT PROVIDED.”
TAN A YU YAAD!
YU NUH SEE SEY
WI NUH HAVE NOTHIN TO GIVE
YU?
DI FALSE TEETH DEM ALREADY
A DROP OUT OF THE ELDERS DEM MOUTH,
CAUSING DEM NOT TO EAT
AND NOW YU WANT TO COME AROUND
AND MEK DEM LOOK LIKE ONLY
BONES A WALK PON DI STREET
TAN A YU YAAD!
YU NUH SEE SEY
WI NUH HAVE NOTHIN TO GIVE
YU?
POVERTY ALREADY A WRECK HAVOC
PON DI PLACE LIKE A CATEGORY 1 HURRICANE
DARK BROWN GOLDEN ROOFTOPS
HAVEN’T SEEN A COAT OF PAINT IN DECADES
PINK LIPS TRANSFORM TO WHITE
OH WHAT A SIGHT!
HUNGER GRIPS THE INTESTINES
SIX PACK, A COMMON COMMODITY DAT
ZILLIONS OF SLENDER MODELS TO CHOOSE FROM,
IF THE OPPORTUNITY PRESENTED ITSELF,
SO, GWAAN BOUT YU BUSINESS COVID-19
TAN A YU YAAD!
YU NUH SEE SEY
WI NUH HAVE NOTHIN TO GIVE
YU?
I see the people watching,
Waiting for mistakes,
In this seas of fish,
We are all the bait.
Perfect is seen as average,
As the average becomes estranged,
When the best becomes expected,
The worst is what entertains.
‘cause no one cares if you’re good,
They all want to see the bad,
So don’t be surprised by their laughs,
It is honestly quite sad.
RuPaul is one of the happiest people I know
Spreading joy and sunshine wherever she goes,
Quick-witted and sharp as a tack they say
She’s worth a few million dollars in residual pay,
[always dresses to the nines, be it female or male]
With hair and makeup to be envied by most
RuPaul has every reason, I think, to boast,
For her Drag Race alone she is known far and wide
I know, I know, there are some who will chide,
But RuPaul is an entertainer to be admired
By every person whose success she inspired,
And regular folks, too, can sound her praises
For every unique individual she gladly embraces.
GOLD MEDAL WINNER
"RuPaul" Poetry Contest
All Poetry
April 15, 2022
Written April 12, 2022
[for an All Poetry contest]
Maybe these those her eyes
Her love lavishes me
For I feel secure and just
Like a fine wine,
the relationship will get better with age
This is a man who likely enjoys his woman's company
They shall drink dine-in, partake of delectable foods
Rich in culture and mouthwatering desserts
I know, so you are having a nice candlelit dinner
We're sipping on some delicious cocktails
Enjoying the music or entertainment this
I, the man, want the Finer Things in life
This woman is going to be a grounding for him
This woman because she has, you know where
That's where he talks about being trained
Raised in the ammunition of the Lord?
4/17/22
Written words by James Edward Lee Sr. ©2022
Entertaining Entry, I Hope
Who will I have been I past and yesterday?
Today yet still be same person tomorrow
When writing poem my style and only way
Not gifted so your encouragement borrow.
I there more of me in I or maybe I in me
Perfect company in for each other to be
Then threw in myself and started to see
That in the end appeared quite a trilogy.
(I know Freud is ego, id and super-ego.)
Poets pretend that qualities are inherent
Politicians prove points by being transparent
To me those things they preach are big joke
Small brains and hands should start to soak.
My twilight may be approaching and near
And 50th anniversary is almost here
Also to many I hope it is hard to tell
My 75th birthday is still close as well.
Instead of temptation off trying to fight
Many more peoms will continue to write.
Written April 5, 2016 for the Who ARE you? Poetry Contest of Catie Lindsey
Inspired by AD of course and don't know how to enter it. Create a feature
that automatically filters through my over 2,000 poems and picks out best
one for each contest. That ought to be interesting. Jim Horn
It was so captivating to watch “MJ” moonwalk across the stage.
Contest: One-Liner Entertainment
Sponsor: Silent One
12-18-18
My journey through life is made so much better with the good friends that surround me
These people are there in times of need, always willing to help, it's plain to see
A special someone I can call on to rescue me when my car breaks down
That person who can bring a smile to my face so I may lose that frown
An evening out on the town made so much more entertaining by having friends to share my night of fun
Never failing to lend a hand to help me get that important job done
Having people who don't judge me but treat me for who I am
Always being there for me when I get in a tough jam
Someone who is there standing by my side in good times and bad
My good friends always can bring a smile to my face when I am a little sad
There are so many things that I am thankful for that good friends bring to my life
But without a doubt my best friend is my loving wife
I watch talented chefs on tv
And how they make it look so easy
Massive walk-in refrigerators
Recipes for bold innovators
Freshest produce exotic and rare
Excessive abundance they do prepare
Combining components with finesse
Topping lush dishes with watercress
AP: Honorable Mention 2020
Submitted on July 15, 2019 for contest CORNUCOPIA COOKING sponsored by CHANTELLE ANNE COOKE - RANKED 4TH
Culinary passion on a plate.
Fine dining for guests and loved ones.
Extravagance to impress taste buds.
Wordku: 5-7-5 words
AP: Honorable Mention 2026
Builder-blocks build with
Builder-blocks are entertaining
Entertaining for little ones
Entertaining even for adults
Adults get creative
Adults articulate to their children
Children build towers
Children build houses
Houses can be different sizes
Houses can be one color or colorful
Colorful pieces interlock
Colorful endless play
Play creative handcrafted
Play and still learn
Learn to be interacting
Learn social skills
Skills grow and develop
Skills artistic challenges
Challenges to understand them
Challenges in children’s life
Life to figure problems
Life own experience
Experience earning success
Experience own respect
Respect by modeling
Respect amidst friends
Friends from school
Friends that are special forever
Forever be yourself
Forever be spiritually joyful
Joyful fulfillment of oneself
Joyful excitement of love
Love toward someone
Love is the deep heart feeling
Feeling compassion or passion
Feeling angry or sad
Sad and conflicted with thoughts
Sad in streams of tears
Tears echo silence and despair
Tears of happiness
Happiness than never ends
Happiness to the heart
Heart guiding smile
Heart inside sings
Sings to dream
Sings for comfort and peace
Peace of mind
Peace of freedom
Freedom…
Mind…
While outside it may be raining,
Inside new priest is entertaining;
To us occurred,
Heard God's word;
Hope forever he will be remaining.
Jim Horn
Priest With Parish Was Intermingling
When priest with parish was intermingling,
Left sensations causing us to be tingling;
While in harbor,
Saw his barber;
Be a clown in circus of Brothers Ringling.
Many things about our priest seem so weird;
Heartbreaker who wore a handsome beard;
Big Bible thumper,
While at Ft. Sumter,
And by many husbands has been feared.
You ought to hear our choir at practice;
Concentrated while sitting on a cactus;
Noise was loud,
And were endowed;
We said they should go on a sabaticus.
Jim Horn
Adherence to Clearance and Disappearance
To many things there must be adherence;
Could be results of another new clearance;
Something buy;
So we will try,
And for it we will have to run interference.
Jim Horn
I keep going over ten again. Oh, well.
God's care upon me please do cast,
Even if flag has been at half mast;
Fulfils my need;
Me does feed,
And know forever will last and last.
Our Kitty’s allergic to peanuts,
Most don’t eat meat anymore,
Lynn and Tim are Vegans
Alex is a staunch carnivore.
Vegan, Veggies and carnies
All coming to visit for lunch
Sue was tearing her hair out
Planning feeding such a bunch.
Our first family get together
After more than two Covid years
Set us all a panic hoping that
The day didn’t end in tears.
Thanks to modern supermarkets
And a bit of a marathon shop
All those dietary requirements
Didn’t quite catch us on the hop.
Entertaining the family these days
With those modern eating quirks,
Thank the Lord for listed ingredients
A scheme that obviously works.
The sun was bright and warm
So we could all eat alfresco
All more than complementary
When it was time for them to go.
It was a really great success
Once the planning was complete
And now we can both get back to
Buying just what we like to eat.
We’re a meat and two veg couple,
All carefully calorie counted.
It took more than little effort but
All difficulties had been surmounted.
When I think of my Mam and Dad,
They just wouldn't have believed it,
A generation from leaner times with
No option but to take it or leave it.
Memory glosses over the facts of
What were the necessary ways,
The truth of the matter being
Those weren’t quite such Good Old Days.