Best Downright Poems


Premium Member I Had a Martini: Ok, Maybe Four

It'd been one of the most bizarre days; downright crazy
so I had a martini, maybe four, so things got kinda hazy
I fumbled in my wallet so I could pay my pricey bar tab
Friends thought I had too many, so they put me in a cab

I stumbled up the steps. It seems walking was a chore
Couldn't find my key, so I tried beating down the door
Her screeches of "Where the bloody hell have ya been?"
Pounded in my head, making me sorry that I'd come in.

She hissed, then off to the kitchen she foolishly prattled
With horrendous noises, pots and pans were being rattled
My head was sorely throbbing so I begged her to be quiet
She screamed, "Don't yell at me! Blame your liquid diet!"

She banged a bowl of something down on the table cloth.
I weaved my way to a chair as my mouth began to froth
Put my head in my hands when the room started spinning
Caught a glimpse of that evil woman. Yeah, she was grinning

A mound of muck she'd plunked down right in front of me
looked like it should still be swimming in the salty sea
It smelled vile and disgusting... nauseatingly atrocious
I gagged and turned away, that's when Liz became ferocious

I couldn't move an inch to find my way back to the couch
I was a brick, held by mortar. My wife was being a grouch
but I couldn't find the strength to flee.  I felt far too dizzy
My turn to shout, "Can you just stop your naggin', Lizzie?"

I didn't mean to say it, and my words came out so slurred
My vision was fuzzy. Everything was clouded and blurred
Something was staring up at me while awful music played
That's when I saw green heads and grew appallingly afraid 

Whether fantasy or reality, frogs had escaped from a pond
These were fugly creatures. From evil they'd been spawned
I was being serenaded by a quartet of deep croaking voices
So suffers the drunken man while his heartless wife rejoices

I crawled to bed when I couldn't take the harmony any more
Lizzie punched me and said, "Wake up if you're gonna snore."
I tripped down the stairs, woke the dog and made him bark
Left the wife and found a bench to sleep it off in the park
© Lin Lane  Create an image from this poem.
Categories: downright, humor,
Form: Rhyme

Premium Member Jesus of Galilee


There are things I won’t forget about my past.
Lessons, many strewn throughout my heart and soul.
Endless tears sometimes bleed, feel they’ll ever last.
Those tears pass by, and I know they’ve made me whole.
I’ve been blessed to know God wouldn’t leave me downcast.
His love and grace, bound to comfort and console.
Where He leads, I’ll follow, seeking His relief.
He restores my hope and peace, soothing my grief.

There are restless lures that try to dim my light,
Despite my worst fear, I have One who is brave.
For my soul, He isn’t scared to stand up and fight.
He’s the King who died for sinners He forgave.
Since I know Him as my Lord, my heart is right,
Oh, my, my, how I love that King who can save!
Reflected in each dawn are hints of His love.
He always stirs my heart with joy from above.

There is music He plays, love so like a song,
His gentle love feels like the sweetest embrace.
Where I’m downright weak, He makes me fully strong.
When I’m most humble, He tells me of His grace.
Knowing love like this will never lead you wrong.
I’m so eager to meet Jesus face-to-face.
When I leave this world, I know He will meet me.
I’m grateful for my Jesus of Galilee.
Categories: downright, blessing, christian, faith, forgiveness,
Form: Ottava rima

Premium Member Wild And Free

Psyches on the edge
Psyches going wild
Wild child oh so daring 
Wild one hellish bold 
Bold and downright brazen
Bold though fiercely blind
Blind to subtle logic 
Blind eyed scourge 
Scourge imposed on others  
Scourge the plague of self
Self damned sinking vessel  
Self whose clearly lost
Lost on deep meaning 
Lost boon fellow now 
Now I must reflect  
Now transform or heal 
Heal some wretched  burden 
Heal this stricken heart
Heart that beats with pathos  
heart when wondrous glad 
Glad a buoyant vision
Glad I promptly changed 
Changed barren outlook 
Changed complex-ridden life 
Life as joyful premise 
Life based on love
Love weaves magic dreams 
Love induces spells  
Spells I adopt 
Spells alter mindset 
Mindset yours or mine 
Mindset chasing peerless time  
Time a spur for dormant brain  
Time awash with thinking 
Thinking valued options 
Thinking of growth 
Growth of mental wellness
Growth our golden gift
Gift to cosset and explore 
Gift as relish 
Relish inner calm
Relish broad spectrum issues 
Issues within reach 
Issues sleight and grand  
Grand scheme on horizon 
Grand environment free 
Free in every single sense 
Free from vapid earthly care 
Care…
Sense…
Categories: downright, birth, care, deep, destiny,
Form: Blitz

Book: Radiant Verses: A Journey Through Inspiring Poetry


Premium Member Wear Green--Or Else

There’s coming a time of great cheer
when folks will drink gallons of beer
   tell tales of wee sprites
   and magical sights.
St. Patrick’s Day soon will be here.

On that day, if you don’t wear green,
just stay in your house. Don’t be seen,
   or else a hard pinch
   might cause you to flinch.
Some pinchers can be downright mean!
Categories: downright, humor,
Form: Limerick

Beautiful

You consider yourself average on a good day,
somewhat pretty on a whimsical day,
and downright atrocious on a bad day.
Your hair can’t decide to be straight or curly.
Your eyes are either luminous or dreary.
Your nose…too big.
Lips…to small.
Nothing looks right at all.
That’s why we have doctors. 
Doctors to cure the horrible genes inflicted on you.
Doctors that can construct an artificial being,
made out of your lack of self-confidence, 
and belief in self-mutilation. 
Doctors that say they can make you beautiful.
Claiming that you aren’t beautiful now.
But you let them…
You let them call you ugly.
Let them plaster your face with assurances,
and guarantees.
In order to make you beautiful.
They cut your face.
Remake something that was already good, 
Into something worse.
Doctors that give you a lie.
Doctors that pledge to fix something
when they mean to break it. 
They say you are ugly.
You aren’t pretty.
No, you definitely are not pretty.
You’re beautiful.
Categories: downright, abuse, beautiful, beauty, body,
Form: Free verse

Premium Member Sabbath Playgrounds

Sunday afternoons,
or Saturday afternoons,
look and feel richer,
dense relational liturgy of mundane ritual,
often more sabbath quiet.

Quiet neighborhood school playground
celebrates more solitary visits
seeking silent sensory selftalk,
muse swings back and forth,
happy slides up elational,
processional,
then downright ecstatic.

Sunday's GratitudeGoRound
of a warm winter's sun
pretexting Spring's redemptive dance,
prancing across wet jungle gyms
of mythic pirate romance,
swinging Tarzans and Janes
flying rope to rope
bar to bar
beating outdoor kettle drums
of Sunday's sacred playground joy.

This light we bring to sabbath
Sunday's sun absorbs 
full resolved through echoing play,
a child again
in love's sequestered Solar System womb
giving happy birth to weeks
becoming strong,

EarthBound PlayGround
ecstatically beloved 
Queen Shabbat's weekly baptism 
in love child's regenerativity.
Categories: downright, culture, heaven, humanity, light,
Form: Free verse


Premium Member Older Than Dirt

When I was a young lad in the prime of life
Never thought I'd still be around
When my driver's license said, “older than dirt!”
And my mind was no longer sound

But I can get away with a bunch of neat stuff
Rack it up to “he's left the planet!”
“His mental capacity equals that of a wee child”
Gonna take full advantage, run the gamut

Need to pee and dribble now and then
Talk in riddles and scratch my bum
Wipe my boogies on my Sunday clothes
And belch when company comes

Know all the tricks as I giggle to myself
It's a downright lead pipe cinch
Con them till they put me in a old pine box
Mumbling about my belly button lint
Categories: downright, age,
Form: Rhyme

Please Hold

"Thank you for calling….”
Is what’s trained to be said
But when they get irate and lewd
I feel like hanging up instead.

This person’s always right, that person’s never wrong.
Mr boss sir, your breath is oh so strong !
they’re mean and crass, just downright rude 
I might just be naughty and get the big boss sued.

I give picture perfect smiles,
the really artificial Kind
Welcome and please come again,
you just died ten times in my mind

Just got off the last call and I don’t mean to be crude 
But goodbye till tomorrow, the next complaint I’ll elude


A collaboration with Stephanie Allen/Sean Solomon/Niketa Mckenzie
Categories: downright, funny, work,
Form: Sonnet

Uppity Darkie



Light minded people say I’m an uppity darkie
They color me bad, 
with a black face, felt pen Sharpie
Vanilla voices downright don’t like
the audio sounds of this mouthy darkie
They say I’m way too uppity,
don’t know what my proper place be
Snow cone hats say they gon have to teach me,
there's a painful cost for thinking free
They wanna call the fascist calvary and give me
some old-fashioned triple Kord rope justice,
by them good ole boys neo-Nazi vigilantes 
They say my strait Nazarene speech
borders on treason,
that it needs to be muzzled
But I’ve always given king Pharaoh Caesar
his required slave taxes — 
His printed paperweight metallic tribute ...
so what’s the dispute?
My Herodian enemies want so bad
to reach into their torture trick bag,
and gag my mouth with a gasoline soaked rag
Then lie in wait for my muffled words
to set that tri-colored cloth on fire
Red cheek coconut meat,
dressed in blue uniforms pressed neat,
wanna beat, kick, pound 
some patriotic sense into me
Giving thinly veiled warnings:
saying ship that ghetto talk back to Africa
Carting rice-colored evil thoughts
that are Balaam Iscariot store bought
Walking weeds in the Goshen grassroots,
wearing bloodstained slaughterhouse coats,
got indigo disdain for this uppity darkie
They wanna sell some 
strange rotting fruit hanging from a tree
Hating me because I stood up 
in the open free market place
And declared with Lion of Judah boldness,
they were selling the people rancid red meat lies 
wrapped in waxy white packages
And giving State-Don’t-Care samples away 
of Pabst Blue Ribbon beer bottles of hate
I ain’t nothing but a pseudo-smart, intellectual wannabe
It’s what my rabbit ears detractors say ... 
yeah, that’s how they regard me
As just another trouble making uppity darkie
Categories: downright, allusion, prejudice, racism, truth,
Form: Bio

Premium Member Oceans

My boyfriend (Peter) and I went down to New Haven Harbor today.

Let’s face it, we’re surrounded by oceans,
and most of them are downright inhospitable.

I live near the ocean, (pointing) it’s right over there.
I love the ocean, tripping over whenever I’ve time to spare.

The way I’m fawning over it, you’d think I know it well.
But I really only love its edges and undulating swells.

It’s like a book that I’ve judged by its cover,
a beautiful stranger taken as a lover,
or a pie when I’ve only tasted the crust.
I love something, I suppose, I’ve barely even touched.
 
Peter says that black, inky “outer-space” is a low-viscosity liquid,
another, even vaster ocean that’s more dangerous and rarely visited.

The air that we breathe is an ocean - our own, vast, atmosphere -
in it swim creatures too small to see, but to the naked eye it looks clear.
It flows, eddies and swells - birds swoop in it so you can tell.

Of course, the ocean has issues - it's hardly news - corrosion, erosion, sharks 
and drowning - and the way the ocean lets the moon and air push it around.

What I love most is its motion, and how it reflects the sun and the moon. 

Did I mention that hanging-out by the ocean makes for a pleasant afternoon?
Categories: downright, books, boyfriend, ocean, space,
Form: Rhyme

Premium Member The King's English -- George W Bush, Jr

Did you tire of one President's lecturing and preaching?
Do you cringe at another's tweets, his lechery and "leechering?"

Then as George W Bush Jr's term fades from the annals of recency
Let us recall the stirring words of this man of abiding decency

"Junior" as the USA's President was a bit of an anomaly
As he observed: "I know how hard it is to put food on your family." (Jan, 2000)

It was rather hard to take his Presidency all too seriously
After this: "I know the human being and fish can coexist." (Sept., 2000)

For education, he and Laura shared a passion, a yearning 
To wit: "Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?" (Jan, 2000)

Of course, Bush could also be sharp as a tack, downright uncanny 
Like the time he bragged, "They misunderestimated me!" (Nov, 2000)

And after eight years in office, "W" had become quite the orator
As seen in this reflection: "I think I was unprepared for war, --er." (Dec, 2008)

So there you have it, a smattering of evidence
  ~ That speaking the King's English is not required of a President
Categories: downright, humorous, language, leadership, usa,
Form: Rhyme

Premium Member Indecisive

I once was quite indecisive
but now I am not so sure,
I’ve got to make my mind up
but it’s a downright chore!

So when two choices are offered
and I’ve got to choose some cake,
I’ll cut a slice off each of them
I can’t afford to make a mistake!

If I post this in Constance’s contest 
it’s early days, it’s not a race,
but if I hesitate for a moment
I may be tardy and not get a place!

Perhaps I should pen another poem
but then again I’d have to choose,
If I were to chose the other one
she may not like it and I’d lose!

Once I was quite indecisive
but now I’m not very sure,
so I really must make a decision
but it’s turned into an arduous chore!
Categories: downright, conflict, humorous,
Form: Rhyme

Canyon of Cold

And because iniquity shall abound,
the love of many shall wax cold
Matt. 24:12


In the depths of their heart
is a frozen soul
Mean spirited, cruel and hateful
They got a downright nasty attitude,
will cuss you out just because
Don’t need no particular reason why
Their innermost desire towards someone 
is wishing they would die
Having no real affection for friend or foe,
they’re incapable of experiencing love

Their hatelust is grand and bold,
they got a rocky heart canyon of cold

In the bottom of their heart
is buried a frozen soul
They dwell among the dead things,
and move in the midst of the living
Stone cold wax that don’t melt,
evil thoughts and feelings feed this arctic flame
They love blaspheming God’s holy name
But the wick on their cold candle is short,
there is no heat emanating from their heart
They just keep heaping hate,
			           upon hate upon hate
on the passing compassion collection plate
As I pray for them ... 
hoping it’s not too late,
too late ... it’s gotten too late
For them to pass through the pearly gate
They’d rather stay in their arctic fortress below:
Letting their frozen heart 
		                  gather more ice and snow 
in the hell canyon of cold
Categories: downright, dark, heart, spiritual, truth,
Form: Dramatic Verse

Premium Member The Predictable Old Workday Grind

Organ grinder
Meat grinder
Bump-and-grind
   The workday grind

Get up, get out of bed
Drag a comb across my head
Yeah, Yeah, Paul: You knew that was coming --
   Go to work 
   Pour the coffee
   Water the plants 
   Sharpen some pencils
   Head for the water cooler
   Trade some stories...gossip a bit
   Stall...stall...stall...and stall some more...

Get to the meeting on time
Look engaged
Back to my cubby 
   And then: 
   What's this?  A poem?  
   A what?  A poem!
   A poem appears
   comes flying from my fingers
   onto the keyboard 
   up on the screen
   read... saved... printed … 
   posted on social media... 'liked'

   All over the internet 
   Gone viral
   I'm a thing 
   a downright event!
   Yeah, sure I got canned 
   Of course...
   Know anyone looking for a new poet?


            December 03, 2019
         Predictable Poetry Contest
          Sponsor: Nina Parmenter
Categories: downright, work,
Form: Free verse

Premium Member Banana vs Orange

Written: February 23, 2024

                          ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In a grove, a feud grew, no doubt,
Fruit factions were ready to shout.
Banana sought peace,
But his pleas soon would cease,
As the orange kept stirring the route.

With a temper as fiery as flame,
Orange sought to bear Banana shame.
He shouted and yelled,
While Banana rebelled,
Trying to douse the feud's flame.

But Orange was relentless and mean,
His anger turned downright obscene.
He challenged Banana,
With no sign of mana,
Creating a chaotic scene.

Banana, in a last-ditch effort, pled,
"Let's put this feud to rest," he said.
But Orange just jeered,
And sneered as he neared,
Determined to jam Banana with dread.
© Sotto Poet  Create an image from this poem.
Categories: downright, fruit, funny,
Form: Limerick
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