Best Doggone Poems

There was a dog owner named Mark
Whose beagle would constantly bark
The neighbours would moan
They’d steal Benji’s bone
And toss it away in the park

18th February 2016...

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My Fido was booked into the vets
To remove his ‘love making’ assets
He was due for an op
Where his ‘bits’ got the chop
No puppies; I’d have no regrets

We arrived near the vet’s surgery
Fido yelped that he needed to wee
He heard another dog bark
Then scampered off to...

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"GO FETCH"

Call me whatever to suit your moods
Lay me out with cuss words, “give me the goods”

Scandalize my name every place you go
“It’s a dog eat dog world” but I hate that flow

So scatter your venom to the four winds of earth 
Burn the night...

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I‘d been staying with pa - my folks got a divorce
and pa took me to the local greyhound course 
Pa’s greyhound was running, he runs very fast
He’s called Pterodactyl, pa’s dog never comes last!

I stayed in the stalls, it was pouring with rain
and our ‘Terry’...

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.     *DOGGY  STYLE*

Tonight! Tonight! I must display.
About my man's doggy style way.

Once he comes home he acts like I'm his "DOGGY BAG."
"It’s DOGGING ME!" The way he starts to nag.

He came from the bar with his "DOG BREATH!"
Calling me by...

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I guess it would cause oohs and ahhs
if I wrote of the doggie's doo dahs
So I'd best keep it clean
even though it will mean
this 'tale' will be wagging the dog, haha....

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Rufus: Irish Rover Purebred and a Fortune 500 Pup ( As told by Rufus himself.)

Watch me snarl all the salesmen away,
ram the door, keep the mailmen at bay.
Each evening, I break
for a fresh T-bone steak.
The sun shines on my ass the WHOLE day....

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OH SHOOT!!!  .A DOGGONE COOKIE    
 
He wanted from her some sweet nookie.
Instead all he got was a cookie.
He suffered his fate.
When he went to date.
Because the poor girl then played hookie!!!!
 
06/19/14...

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I took my doggy for a ride.
She looked so cute sitting by my side.

And then she gave a little cough
And couldn't seem to turn it off.

She was sick on the seat, but it got worse
She threw up into my open purse.

She was just as sick...

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<                              tell me now   Who ! Who ! ~  Let The Dogs Out...

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no muddy paw prints
show on the kitchen floor now…
your leash hangs unused

FICTION WRITE

08-26-17...

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The
5 second
rule you all use 
for dropping food on 
the floor is useless if 
you have got a 
2 second 
dog...

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Doggone night…

Once there was an old and lonesome crow.
I‘ll tell the story the way I know.
The crow was so dark, darker than night.
darkness with shadows, gathering fright.
One day between the dark and the dawn, 
the air was heavy the moon withdrawn;
He saw the light at...

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The Hair of the Dog

You can drink til your dead as a log
And get up with your head in a fog
tomato juice cocktail
two jiggers ginger ale
and a taste of the hair of the dog

She calls you, you’re jumpy as a frog
you act cool, your head...

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Joe Murphy built a wall at great expense.                       
He bought a vicious dog to guard the fence. 
One night there was a dense...

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