Best Dae Poems
Wur in RE an the nuns are gien
oot sweeties, fur getting the kweschins right.
Three oota three, then she’s askin mae who Jesus’ mither is.
‘Ah doan’t know sista,’ ah tell hur.
She isnae happy an tells mae tae hink aboot it. So ah dae
an ah wurk oot Jesus wis god. It wis a trick kweschin,
‘he didnae hiv ah mither.’ Ma
sweet stoats aff the side ae ma heid.
She’s spittin in ma coupon fur a name, an
diggin hur digits in ma neck.
‘Ah doan’t know who Jesus’ friggin mither wis!’
Miraculously ah float tae the front ae the cless. Ma haun’s oot,
bit ah doan’t hink shill hit mae wae that big stick. Thwack!
Ah look doon it the bloody gash through ma puddlin
eyes, ‘yoo’ve broke ma haun’ ah croak,
then turn roon an boak.
scotland poem
bonnie scotlands the place to be,
whar awe yae ever may want tae be,
fae glens n lochs and water to
lookin arood scotland whor thars a bonnie view,
whar the lads may wear thar kilts
whar the wumin get thir little thrils
its nae a place fur sun n sand
still wae awe the rain
scotlands a bonnie land,
wee rabbie burns came fae ayr
an his cottage is still stanin there
just alang the road me fae me
just doon by the bonnie sea,
whar aw the sand and water to,
ayr is a place wae a bonnie view,
in scotland we hae loads o fun
even if we dinae hae nae sun,
whar ya go tae cleer ya heed
wae the fresh air that helps ya indeed,
glesga is a fair big old toon
whar all the fun sterts when the sun goes doon
ya hae twa teams left n right
that get tae europe wae a return flight,
we dae hae oil anaw
wish we could buy it and prices dae faw,
so when ya want tae come n see
vist ayr toon an you may see me,
a wull wear ma kilt n coat n hat
n show ya scotland bonnie land,,
Form:
Don cross dah line young man
For you caan see dae other side
Yu plate alreadae full
With rep fruits fit fo dae king
I say, hol on. Don yu cross dah line
Even dae dog know how big a bone to chew
Yea time rushing by like dae wind
But today nat for you
Take yur time enjoh dae flavor
Sofly, sofly you gon reach
To dae place where yu s’pose to be
Now eat wha before yu savor each rep fruit
‘Cause once yu cross dah line
yu ain know wha dae be servin
African American/Liberian(pidgin English)
Wake Up, Give Thanks!
Seeing it for what it really is,
The day is no mistake,
So i woke up on the wake up too great,
ME, being the man i am is not enough to self create,
I share like my kindergarten lunch ummm taste,
For the mind is a day, so unique, so just one,
So one can just live off that day,
If lived right by one,
Never ever to forget last nights white sun,
Not to predict like prophet my todays outcome,
I will be what is written,
Write it down for all to come,
To see what is made, Us all by one,
So the thought of right goes left,
An what's left made for some,
Wake up, and give thanks like one.
Nigh on ninescore year hae I
Preside o'er thaes city faer
But i' shoundna be me on thaes stule
In Mad King Gaerge's Squaer
In life a saemple claerk o' law
Who frae Edinburrah hael
'nd 's kent tae woo thae lasses
Wi' an auld ramaentic tael
Naw I set upon mae paerch
'nd watch Glaswegians pass
'nd time again mae eye doth fix
Upon a bonny lass
Thaer be but one wee aeggravation
I 'ud gladly tae shed
Faer I'ud rathaer dae wi'out
Thae seagael on mae haed
August 25, 2017
Eedjit, bamstick, scunner and twit,
Am no wan o’ them, am jist a nit.
People whae’ve kent me, aw ma days,
Say am unstable, in aw ma ways.
They dinna really ken, the person ah am,
A real great guy, and no’ a bam.
Ah dae some awfy funny things,
But ahm no a hanky, cranky ---- jings!
Dae ye ‘oanestly think, am really ‘bats’,
Eyes all ablaze, like a big Manx cats.
Yellin’ an’ screamin’, an’ roond the bend,
A daft wee looney, tae the very end.
Ah tell ye ya’ great big scunnerin’ oafs,
Ye better no’ let me hear ye scoaff.
Ah’ll batter yer lugs against a wa’,
And yaise yer heids, tae play fitba’.
Then ah’ll throw ye under a movin’ train,
An’ mak mincemeat, oot o’ yer feeble brains.
Am a real great guy, the very best
But dinnae dare pit me tae the test!
Ah had a aulder bruther whin ah wis wee,
ah wis five then an' he -wis nine yea see.
A tendid tae follow him aboot,
bit bein' aulder he widnae care a hoot.
Aw jings a remember wan day at school,
oot o' ma pocket ma hankie a bullyboy did pull.
Whit arrrr' yea cryin' fur? Ma brother Jack did say,
that big bullyboy pinched ma hankie whin ah wis at play.
Noo bein' aulder an' bigger he set aboot his bloke,
at furst the bloke thocht it wis a joke.
Bit no fur lang whin Jack grabbed this blokes wee wee parts,
the bully bloke screamed an' had an involuntary fart:)
Weel a gote ma hankie back an' it stoaped me fidgin',
as that bullyboy bloke walked away haudin' his Nether region"
Naw ma bruther wis no fond o' playin' wae me,
bit he wid a'ways protect me tae the Nth degree.
Whin a wis Nine an' ma bruther wis thirteen.
Jack wis a'ways oot an' never tae be seen,
Wan day ma faither came hame frae his workin' day.
"Alex" he shouted oot the windae , cum in this minit frae play.
Jings, crivens he wis in a blidy angry mood,
a wid hiv ran a mile if a possibly could.
Did you burn aw those window curtains doon?
a looked up at the windae an' blidy swooned.
The curtains wir hingin' wae a wee bit charcoaly thread,
oh crivens a wished as wis blidy dead,
No me faither, naw it wisnae me,
jist then, at that moment, ah hid an' involuntary pee.
The door opened an' Jack came in,
his face white as if he had done a terrible sin.
Sorry faither it wisnae Alex that done this horrible deed,
oh so sorry faither I wis stupid, Jack did 'onestly plead.
It wis me as ah flicked a lighted match,
oan blidy fire those curtains did catch.
Aw a kid dae wis tae pull them doon oan the flair,
an' smuther the flames wae the back o' that there chair.
Noo , faither dinae explode,--- at aw,
even efter aw whit he had saw.
Faither said. Twa things saved yea Jack ma lad,
an' fur those twa things you should be glad.
First wan, yea admitted yer firey crime,
saved yer wee bruther frae a hell o' a time.
Second wan wis yer presence o' mind,
actin' sae quickly whin yea were in a terrible bind.
So ma lad, thank you for being so quick an' true,
no punishment but a reward for you is due.
Sadly for me noo baith have gone,
but niver have lights so brightly shone:)
The Auld Yin.
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dae sundae sundae sundae sun
ndae sundae sundae sundae sund
undae sundae sundae sundae sunda
sundae sundae sundae sundae sundae
sundae sundae sundae sundae sundae
sundae sundae sundae sundae sundae sundae sundae
ae sun ae sun ae sun ae sun ae sun ae sun ae sun ae su
dae sundae sundae sundae sundae sundae sun
ae sundae sundae sundae sundae sundae su
sundae sundae sundae sundae sundae
sundae sundae sundae sundae sundae
sundae sundae sundae sundae sundae
sundae sundae sundae sundae sundae
sundae sundae sundae sundae sundae
sundae sundae sundae sundae sundae
sundae sundae sundae sundae sundae
sundae sundae sundae sundae sundae
sundae sundae sundae sundae sundae
undae sundae sundae sundae sunda
ndae sundae sundae sundae sund
dae sundae sundae sundae sun
ae sundae sundae sundae su
sundae sundae sundae
ndae sundae sund
dae sundae sun
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AP: Honorable Mention 2022
Submitted on March 30, 2020 for contest STRAND CHOICE U sponsored by BRIAN STRAND
and October 16, 2018 for contest ONE WORD WIT STYLE sponsored by MAUREEN MCGREAVY
scotland poem
bonnie scotlands the place to be,
whar awe yae ever may want tae be,
fae glens n lochs and water to
lookin arood scotland whor thars a bonnie view,
whar the lads may wear thar kilts
whar the wumin get thir little thrils
its nae a place fur sun n sand
still wae awe the rain
scotlands a bonnie land,
wee rabbie burns came fae ayr
an his cottage is still stanin there
just alang the road me fae me
just doon by the bonnie sea,
whar aw the sand and water to,
ayr is a place wae a bonnie view,
in scotland we hae loads o fun
even if we dinae hae nae sun,
whar ya go tae cleer ya heed
wae the fresh air that helps ya indeed,
glesga is a fair big old toon
whar all the fun sterts when the sun goes doon
ya hae twa teams left n right
that get tae europe wae a return flight,
we dae hae oil anaw
wish we could buy it and prices dae faw,
so when ya want tae come n see
vist ayr toon an you may see me,
a wull wear ma kilt n coat n hat
n show ya scotland bonnie land,,
Form:
Ah hink ay ye each an' every day
i hink ay ye in a huir uv a special way
i hink ay ye in aw 'at ye dae
fur ye pure techt th' warld tae me
ain Ah loove.
------------------------------------------
I think of you each and every day
I think of you in a very special way
I think of you in all that you do
for you mean all the world to me
and I love you.
for the dialect's make the world go round
conteset, sponsored by Deborah Guzzi.
Sound of a song softly sung rose in the air and through windows
Barred to let air and light in and little else.
A lament sung in Gaelic tongue foreign to ears used to French,
But its meaning understood bringing tears .
Longingly she peered through the bars over the countryside and trees,
Fine they looked in their fresh green coats.
White cloud scarse in the azure blue of afternoon sunlight,
Her heart broken in myriad pieces.
In this old castle surrounded by water was this to be her fate,
To die in a stony room of shadows.
Her resolve it grew and plans were formed to escape this place,
Meeting a friend of old named Douglas.
One dark night a boy crept close holding a key for the wooden door,
Disguised as a woman of servitude she escapes.
In a small boat on the dark waters of the loch oars slashing ,
Taking her away inch by inch .
Fearful of pursuit by her captors hearing the oars dipping,
Hoping the dark night would cloak .
Was it a failed marriage that brought her here trickery abound,
Perhaps because I am a woman bold.
A queen she was of royal descent staunch in her beliefs
Castigated by a bitter old man .
Tricked and used by men of power abuses beyond her ken,
Unable in accepting a Queen especially o a different faith
Gaiety an sobriety wurnae fur them.
Allus dressed in black lukin like giant craws
Strutting aboot as if they themsells were yon creaturs o the Earth,
Using their Holy Buik tae tell ithers whit tae dae,
Nae room fur forgiveness frae them big craws.
They plotted oan weys tae rid themsells o this decadent Queen,
Ne,er mind that she wus Queen o their laund
Rather be under Eglish Liz she wis a protestant efter aa.
How foolish ur the plans o men who hae a conceit o themsells.
Who wid use ithers tae dae the durty work
Aa tae keep therr ain hauns clean an free o blud,
But a budy kens who they wur especially therr Goad abune
Lookin doon oan those who plot tae kill,
Tae further therr oan station an fortune.
Gawin agin whit the Guid buk seys deceived intae
Daein the work o the deil.
Shame o these guid men o Scotlands past,
Shame oan therr deceitful weys
An tae thie dey their descendents dae the same,
Selling an betraying therr kintrey for profit an gain.
Andy McIntyre 16/05/2021.
Whit'll ye dae when the Muslims come
If they bring thur minarets,mosques and imams
An' ower the city sound the muezzins' prayer alarms
An' they mak great play o' daein' Ramadan
An' profit frae sellin liquor they themselves ban
Glesga,whit'll ye dae?
Whit'll ye dae when the Muslims come
If they wrap thur wummin in niqab and burqa
An' insist oan usin' the courts Sharia
An' don't let ye mak jokes aboot the prophet
An' tell ye ,if ye dae,ye'd better come aff it
Glesga,whit'll ye dae?
Whit'll ye dae when the Muslims come
If they chant"Allahu Akbar" wi' thur guns in thur fists
An' blaw thumsels up wi' thur suicide vests
An' aw this efter shootin' hunners ae us
An' blamin' the West fur aw ae the fuss
Haw Glesga,whit'll ye dae?
Glancing back, twas as a dream within this dream to me....
Some distant of surreal yet twisted play and I was but a child
At life's mercy trying to navigate no, simply surviving perhaps her
World in woe climbing aneath their desk while the sirens wailed wondering
If every tiny heart held their sorrows as this child ? Covering, new borne lights
Pledging allegiance towards an atrocity at the time we could not know: fast
forward
Beyound his black as white renditions body bags, where nothing has changed
except the date ?
Their conqueror worms reciting abomination's ushering declarations living
breathing situations in dae, they trust.
Form:
Skiet mis
In plaas van woorde uit my pen
Vloei trane uit my hart se oog
Sodra ek sien ek het gewen
Besef ek hoe haar blom uitdroog
In minder as net sewe dae
verloor haar hart sy steun. En weer
probeer oortuig dat wat ek vra:
“Vergeet eenvoudig van die seer”
Verwagtend na die nuwe droom
Voor tyd sy skade weer oopvlek
Vloei woorde na my put se stroom
Waar trane uit ‘n boog vertrek
Tref mis alweer – onsekerheid.
Jy skild en pantserlaag jou hart!
Met ystepyl gelowigheid,
oortuigend, mik ek sonder smart
Form:
We're oan the march wi' Nicola's army
We're oan the road tae kingdom come
Nae matter whit the English dae
We're gonna hiv oor way
And fund Scotland wi' oor oil Elysium.
We're oan the road wi' Nicola's army
It's cheerio tae aw oor auld chums
For we're gonnae try oor luck
And we don't give a flyin' f**k
As we march alang tae independence drums.
We're oan the march wi' Nicola's army
Wi' Tommy's mob marchin' side by side
Noo Labour his loast the place
We will step up oor pace
And leave the UK wi' oor Scottish pride.
We're oan the march wi Nicola's army
As we dream aboot oor ain Macaliphate
Nae matter whit the English say
It's gonnae be oor day
As the EU welcomes oor brand new Scottish state.