Best Clicker Poems
I will not be late to work today
I will get there on time
I will brush my teeth
Without singing songs
Without thinking about birthdays
About gymnasiums
About TAKS
About sound
About war
Republicans
Democrats
Independents
I will get there on time
I will eat my oatmeal
Without thinking of
Broken valentines
Strewn against a wooden
Fence
Like dropped goblets
From a robbers pillowcase
I will be there before the bell rings
My papers will be checked
My hair will be combed
My mind will be alert
Ready to begin my lesson
I will not wonder why
My oldest son doesn’t have a job
I will not pray too long
For my daughter who is taking the bar today
At 10:30 AM in New Orleans
I will not scar my knees wishing
For some alternate world
Where children are never neglected
Or hurt
Where there is no abandonment
What nonsense to try and order the world
Just get to work on time
Put your things in the car, your projector and
The white binders that you didn’t look at
All weekend although you were supposed to check the papers and put the
grades on the computer
I will leave now
Before it is impossible to
Be on time
I will cream my ashy ankles
I will not focus on the white
Cat on the black pillow
With the green eyes
I will not water the plant
I will not watch TV
I will not write poetry
Before work
I will not write poetry
Before work
I will get to work on time
I will be ready
I will not be daydreaming about fog
Wondering if I’ll get Alzheimer’s like my mother
Or colon cancer like my dad
I won’t be thinking about that stuff
I will be locking the front door and
Closing the gate and clicking the clicker
And starting the car and leaving
I will not be in my living room
Wondering if there is any reason to love
Because I do not love for reason
I love because He first loved me
It is not incantations or intoxication
Or imagination it is my life and
The structure will come with the
Clearness of Bajan water
So clear you can see the fish
Fly float across the Atlantic
It is time
This poem must end
I will not be late for work
This morning
Not for nothing
Not for nobody
Not for anything
Not for everything
This poem is over
the work day begins
T errific and terrible, loud and unrelenting, I am suddenly
H ammered by a head splitting, grating screech, as the
E mergency Broadcast Signal blatantly blares from my TV.
N early every glass rattles and shatters, because the
O N button is stuck on its highest setting possible!
I try in vain to find the clicker to lower the volume
S o the earsplitting nightmare of noise will lower, but it keeps on
E scalating, out of control, while I cover my poor ears in agony.
Written on 3/7/2017
During the industrial revolution,
Poe’s raven spoke with elocution;
“Nevermore”, now we’ve a solution,
just you wait for distribution.
We’ve invented great machines,
clicker-clankers, sure to please,
With cogs and wheels that spin with ease
and long, tired days, they will soon cease.
Wondrous gauges, invented by sages,
power-piping giant bird cages;
oh the miracles of the ages,
carefully crafted in small stages.
Just wait and see, you will adore,
hard working backs won’t break anymore,
travelling with steam, from shore to shore
is truly a great way to explore.
Guess what, you’re going to also fly,
like the birds up in the skies;
keep your glass eye, nearby
soon automobiles will be passing by.
Just don your top hat, c’mon gents;
oh, things may cost a few more cents.
just imagine the automated presents,
you can buy, let the future commence!
The words we speak
How clever, how cheap
With just a whisper
We turn cities into glitter
I feel the need for mourning
No, it’s just no good
We’re just no good
What’s the use in proselytizing
The enigmatic, homophobic, problematic, religious fanatic?
Speaking words with little meaning
What’s the use in spewing words with no residual resonance?
Clicking the clicker, hoping for a flicker
Just a bit of sugary static
The manic’s are always the ones to leave everything undone
We make fun of worthless things
Wealthy women with loaded egos
Surrounded by air heads, a multitude of morons
It’s bad enough I have to endure feelings I can’t express
Must I entertain the notion of a people with good intentions?
Left captive in a cage
Stuck here, engaged in a fit of rage
I hope to negate the arrogant & obstinate
From enjoying the fruits of my cerebral labor.
The master of the living room
‘Cause I’ve got the clicker
My children, to my tastes shall groom
‘Cause I’ve got the clicker
They storm around, they scream and shout
They act as if they’re al put out
They whine and moan, complain and pout
‘Cause I’ve got the clicker
Procedurals, I won’t partake
‘Cause I’ve got the clicker
Network news lies and berates
But I’ve got the clicker
Adventure tales, I am a fan
Better sit-coms, I can stand
But mostly I steam on broadband
When I have the clicker
Reality, thy grind at me
So I grab the clicker
A stress release, so great the need
So I grab the clicker
To reset faith with simple tales
To restore peace amidst travails
I rarely feel so week or frail
When I’ve got the clicker.
Expensive addiction, this thing called TV,
like a zombie I become when I sit upon
my brown plush sofa.
Beside me my little dog Dizzy rolls her
eyes as she thinks to herself, "Here goes another boring day,
my mom won't get up off her fat behind and play - no my mom
always has an excuse like the medicines she has to take make her
too tired, or that the weather is too hot or too cold, might as well
stay in.
So here we sit and I watch her watch one show, and then the next,
often she does this as she stuffs her face saying that her blood sugar
would get too low if she did not eat.
Sometimes she even watches Doctor OZ if one of her other shows
are not on, and my mom will sit there paying close attention to all
he says even while stuffing herself with a PB&J. She says I will
get to that healthier routine right away...
Then there are times she will stop watching TV just enough
to look around the house at the chores that are waiting to be done,
then she adjusts the volume on the clicker and shrugs her
shoulders, meaning that she is putting off the chores for another
time, for another day.
I do get her to take me for walks after I lay upon her shoulders
and lick her face into submission, oh don't worry she spoils me
beyond compare and that' why slowly but surely I am getting her
to take each day much more seriously. I tell her to not waste time,
let's go out and play, get what needs to be done out of the way!
She call me a Jesus dog, a little furry angel with invisible wings.
Well all I have to say to that... It's possible!"
Okay Guys, let's do our thing,
The game is almost on,
So get some beer and chips or nuts,
And chairs to sit upon.
Okay Guys, let's buy some tools,
So we can look like handy men.
Hammer, Wrench, and Pliers too,
We'll surely use them again and again.
Okay Guys, let's fix that shelf,
So the pictures won't tumble down.
It will only take a few minutes,
Then our sorrows we can drown.
Okay Guys, let's go out on a date,
We can see a movie or a show.
We'll ask the girls to join us,
And hope they won't say "NO".
Okay Guys, let's watch TV,
With the clicker in our hand.
It's the only time we have control,
When we feel in FULL COMMAND!
Okay Guys, the Girls still love us,
At least that's what they say...
So let's just enjoy this moment in time,
THEY get the rest of the day!
Am a better sinner
And so in here am a winner
Am hiding the bitter
That's cooks in there so inner
Am the smooth butter
With the highlighted clicker
Because all i do is click
But you, oh you
You commit it all, the good in the bad
The bad in the good
You don't hide
Well, sometimes you do
You are my entertainment
You are very captivating
Sometimes i want to be so bad, so bad like you
Dressed in your suit, with all that soot
But i know my limit, i know the rules
It's you i see
Nestled in his recliner,
His body oozes into the grooves,
Filling up every nook, every cranny
Until a synergistic union of man and
La-Z-Boy is achieved.
His eyes are unreceptive, half closed watching his
High definition plasma widescreen;
Yet they remain constant on the TV,
Like a doctor staring at an EKG
Aware for changes or blips.
The right hand’s on top the clicker,
Burning off his body’s reserve
From the Hungry Man breakfast, lunch, and dinners.
Content to recline his life away,
The Sloth stays planted to his domain,
And camouflages with his environment
As the cheetos stains slowly cover his frame.
Okay Guys, let's do our thing
The game is almost on
So get some beer and chips and dip
Comfortable chairs to sit upon.
Okay Guys, let's watch TV
With the clicker in our hand
It's the only time we have control
When we feel in full command.
Okay Guys, let's buy some tools
So we can look like handy men
Hammer, wrench and pliers
We'll surely use them again and again.
Okay Guys, let's fix that shelf
So the pictures won't tumble down
It will only take a few minutes
Then in beer our sorrows we drown.
Okay Guys, let's go out on a date
We can see a movie or a show
We'll ask the girls to join us
And hope they won't say, "No".
Okay Guys, the Girls still love us
At least that is what they say...
So let's just enjoy this moment in time
THEY get the rest of the day!
society is tripping
they got new sport suits for the latest trend
my mind is scrambling like ham in eggs
Bust a nut in a rut some time before
many are tripping out with a two bit whore
people are people so why should it be
you & I live together so awfully
I want to scream but I got hoop dreams
Comb over Trump is president but he hasn't made a dent
we got some screws loose in our brains
not having the television clicker in hand is driving me insane
it used to mean something to hold open a door
but that was so 1974 it don't exist anymore
we still got flower power but it takes place in the shower
we honor the dead with mixed messages in our head
these are desolate times
yet we settle for ill but faded rhymes
the casualties are enormous
for a stated cause that's atrocious
so I build this sanctuary in my mind & no I'm not blind
you really suck the nation is going to hell but
I still got a great story to tell
a winner is still another loser that falls but gets up & gives it one last try..
What is my last reply ?
we all need to grow & shut the hell up !
Proximity is the major factor in who tickles your tickler
The odds are small of tickling ticklers beyond your perimeter
Even though if you met
All worked up you'd get
The sweetie down the streetie will most likely click your clicker
when screams of children being bombed &
women being raped to the sounding drumbeat of war,
some trip over their feet to turn the knob
to click the clicker, change the channel
to
run
run
run away
from the real tragedy spitting back in your face
because the modern conveniences that make your life
cushy
are the same fueling the masquerade that’s destroying lives & killing others
all across the world---
there is no system of checks n’ balances---
the figures of the dead are only accounted for by the winners for the
winners,
and history will have no place for you if you need something that
they are not willing to concede.
for some this is all just easy listening
for some this is all what they run to their cabinet in their kitchen to get the
cleaning fluid to
squeegee the screen
try to make the blood go away
try to make the screams pass on and leave them the rest of their day.
Perhaps a right of passage
or a males destiny
controlling the remote
always seemed just right to me.
Skillful flicking fingers
fast on the keys
scanning thru the channels
and with great dexterity.
Change to other stations
commercials gotta go
such a star on the clicker
a real surfing pro.
It's of course my opinion
but these words I extol
all's right in my world
when I have remote control!
jeopardy clicker
my backyard bird this morning
no one calls on him
4/29/2021