Best Blitzed Poems

Santa Claus was bellowing, things were wacked,
the giant red sleigh was packed,
the reindeer weren't harnessed up,
he stomped in the snow, broke his cocoa cup.

Suddenly, there in the far end of the barn,
what he saw caused alarm,
Rudolph was playing poker,
he was blitzed, being a joker.

Santa's face...

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"Placebo - Part 1"


Deals with God?
I don’t think that is possible.
Depends what cards you’re playing with
and what the trade off is
do you bluff? or 
play it safe and lose all your tricks?

Let’s talk about SIN, 
it sounds delicious 
but once swallowed
it comes out just like...

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Clanging and bashing 
The kitchen's in use
Daughters craving treats 
Allowed on the loose.

Flour, sugar, butter
All over the floor
Dusting the ceiling
Spread thru the drawers.

Seeking seclusion
Mum heads to the mall
Dad's not so enthused
He’s taken the fall!

Vanilla smells waft
Blitzed cake mix atoll
Now one eggs rotten
Phew! Missed the whole...

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aimless and blind
I wasted my youth
left friendship behind 
in search of the truth
no wiser but sadder
ah,but that never mattered 
'cause then I met you

I did my hitch
sowed my wild oats
I burned all my bridges
and sunk all my boats
while the rats had all scattered
ah,but none of...

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This is a true story of seven students
Agone days of those ill-famed fiddles
Musing with drolleries – assiduity on catchy missies
And lamed against educators animalism.
Books usually kept aside but concentration hard on last night
Weekends glossed upon soul mate’s hug
Weekdays went upon escaping tutorials
And the freshers on...

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Pay heed to those deeds from whence the heart must confess...
You're far from Rome Proconsul Caesar...
As they say, "All roads lead to Rome" Ariovistus
and all tresspasses are treated as threats of war...
My recent conquest of your Gaulish pets the Aedui
is justified by the right of...

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Happy.  Genial.  Merry.  Jolly
Blottoed, blasted, etched and blitzed
Mellow, foggy, hazy, squiffy
Tipsy.  Tiddly.  Brahms and Liszt

Dazed, zombied, tanked-up, trollied
Ganted, gubbed, guttered
Bladdered, blathered, leathered, plastered, 
Sozzled, sloshed, scuttered

Hammered, battered, caned, mangled
Spannered, mullered.  Half-cut, lashed
Twisted, warped, slammed, wasted
Wrecked, ruined.  Munted, trashed

Liquified,...

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I use to be a two fisted drinker,
always getting myself totally blitzed.
Now I'm just a social drinker.
Three drinks and that's it,
because the hangovers I'd experience would linger on for days,
leaving me in a very deep depressed state
and who in their right mind would want to...

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NAME: Phil Latio.

QUALIFICATIONS: LLB (Law) PhD (Medicine) & FSC (Federation Starfleet    
                           Commander).

POSITION: Head job.

AGE: pass.

SEX:...

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We wallow in the news of rapacious war,
Glad it is so far away, thank God!
But dare we ask: why do wanton warriors fight?
Like wild wasps out on an ill-fated foray,
sting like hell in the soporific summer sun.

The terrific, fierce fight goes on,
like some wild cat...

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God blitzed Sodom & Gomorrah
Including fauna & flora
Putin says, "Me, too!
I am just like you
Blasting that Box of Pandora!"  

n.b.  after blowing up their home
and family, Russian troops
tell survivors that they have
been liberated from the Nazis! ...

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SPOONING WITH PARCHED PALMS

a banquet of butterflies flutter ~
    by her seaswept hair so bonnie. ~

sunshine and freckles fly free from the sky, ~
     illuminating blue eyes, ~
        dotting her suntanned...

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Have you ever needed to go so bad
That your eyeballs start to cross
Your back teeth began to float around
You're memory's a total loss

It happens to us chappies quite a lot
It's the way we usually react
When downing six or so cold ones
Too blitzed for making tracks

We...

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There's madness in enlightenment,
preferring darkly recesses of denial
    whilst moon descends sensibilities,
shedding white powder florescence
fracturing every crack & crevice,
most days long to dwell
in oblivion, remembers it fondly,
before unicorns and monsters
became real and materialized
   taunting duskiest memories

always knew in her bones
...

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Cold air whistles acquainting
me with Arctic Blast, when
roundly forcing acquiescing
into half foursquare corner, activating
most recent spate of

     ideal linkedin warm weather
ah...,my favorite sweet
     spot for read ding
partially secluded from
     gossip mongers addicting

fellow nosy...

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