Best Barristers Poems
When stretched forever is my day
I while the empty hours away
in courtrooms dank with men of silk
proud and tall
lawmakers all
step lightly lest you meet their ilk
Attorneys and stenographers
lawyers and interpreters
each word they spake is tongue-in-cheek;
lear-ned judges, advocates
prosecutors, barristers
spew Latin which could well be Greek
The courtroom's packed
the gallery stacked
the charge is one of pilfering
the bookie sets
last-minute bets:
"10 to 1 his head will swing."
From the ord'ly
fing'ring his rosary:
"Court's in session! Silence! Zip it!"
His Lordship enters
sans his dentures
sucks his thumb and looks decrepit
Eyes his gavel
sneers: "You're evil!
my thumb is swollen and beet-red
you'll be detained
when next again
I miss and hit my thumb instead.
"The weather vane
predicted rain
today I'll suffer agony
you caveman's hammer
how did you
till now escape technology?"
To put it mild,
the crowd goes wild
but for the shifty-eyed accused
Judge Weatherstorm
stays true to form:
he keeps his audience amused
Th' accused meanwhile
with comely smile
winks at M'Lord to cut him slack
he'll cop a plea
of not guilty
tho' evidence against him's stacked
The star witness
non compos mentis
brain well-addled by Alzheimer's
mounts the stand
bows to his fans
with clenched fist vows the truth to utter ...
(PART 2 TO FOLLOW)
28.04.2011
(This is a work of fiction in its entirety and merely a satirical look at our corrupt
justice system.)
So slick and sexy. Purred past Temple Bar.
That throaty engine advertising punch.
All legal London, strolling out for lunch,
with turning heads declared, “Now that’s a car!”
So many barristers are – if not losers,
low earners and slow learners. I was one.
I, plodding back from Penge, felt put upon:
a plea, a pittance. Now for Holborn’s boozers.
That mean machine was not for saps like me.
I turned my face towards the threatening rain,
and started wearily up Chancery Lane.
A cup of tea and, hopefully, a fee
awaited me in Chambers. Alloy wheels
slid sleekly, silently – stopped at my side.
That car again! I watched the window glide
wide open. And I almost had to kneel
to see the driver. Handsome. Tall and thin.
The shirt was pastel pink, the tie was silk.
The suit was Savile Row, or of that ilk.
His words astonished me. “Well, clamber in!”
And then the penny dropped. It’s Alex R!
Agility has never been my thing,
so Reaney waited, engine idling,
as I shoe-horned myself into his car.
We’d known each other at the School of Law,
but then our paths had radically diverged.
Me, in pleas and poverty submerged,
and he, the wide blue skies of Libel to explore.
“I’ll run you back to Chambers – beat the rain.”
He asked me what had occupied my morning.
For him, the King’s Bench judges were adjourning.
I’d copped a plea in Penge – how to explain?
The major stars had Alex at the helm
when they unleashed their lawsuits on the press.
Defending thefts of bicycles – and less –
was my domain. He ruled a regal realm.
His clients of the moment, man and wife,
were household names. They’d sold their wedding day
to paparazzi, who refused to pay.
The plaint was something weird, like “Stolen Life”.
The man, from Delaware, big hair, and Jewish.
They crank out movies like there’s no tomorrow
(Chicago, Basic Instinct, Traffic, Zorro):
the girl, from Aberdare – think Cher, and shrewish.
To talk of money is a vulgar thing,
but I was desperate to know his fee.
The forty quid I’d earned, I wouldn’t see
for months to come. His wrists were dripping bling.
We’d be at Chambers in another minute.
“So, Alex,” (best to blurt the damn thing out),
“a case like that. You’re looking at … about …?”
He grinned at me and said, “you’re sitting in it.”
"send him down" LET JUSTICE BE DONE.
"send him down "spoke the head of talking wool.
the victims crowd cheering at a volume suitable to fit the crime.
the judge looks lost with his last boom of the gavel.
another day,another life lost to life.
but life don't mean ten years or more.
he's done two on remand,and will be free in five more.
life don't mean love no more.
the rich fly the sky's as the poor share the floor.
"we'll appeal and repeal"said the barristers stare.
matched timidly back by the broken man's glare.
the crime he'd comited was to want to survive.
he fought his attackers and paid with two lives.
should he have laid still there and died?
and had he died there and laid.
would justice have come and made his child less afraid?
would confusion have gone up in smoke with the blame?
"we love you and miss you"read the letter of volumes.
the solicitors are writing through a red taped army.
here are some kisses from us all for you to consume.
your name will be upheld and no longer tarnished.
we love you old fool like the wind loves the rain.
like the birds and the sun, we'll rise together again.
untill that day dawns let hope be your sun.
send him back up,LET JUSTICE BE DONE.
MY ROSE FLOWER:
My rose,
We have been to,
Customary court,
We have been to court of appeals,
It now for us to go and test,
The Supreme Court.
Justice Ben Agbata will be present that day,
So tell me,
How will you strike out the case.
Our purpose of going there is not to sue Rev.
Father,
Ejike Mbaka like Chimaroke Nnamani,
But because I idolize you thee.
Not to see the passerby that there are not present,
But to concubinage you.
My kissing that day will be,
Romance,
While our,
Rings will be thy ally’s ring.
Bother not about the flowers,
For you are a flower already.
Bar Elenus Ogeche will,
Read out the case outline,
But Hakunamatata will blow the whistle like referee,
Bother not about the papers to be spent,
For I am like Soludo.
All this will I do because of thy beauty.
Your body is as beautiful as the queen England,
While thy lips is as sweet as honey.
THEMES
1. Beauty
2. Importance of women
3. The roles of the barristers
4. Legality
5. Equality
6. Peace and unity
HUMAN BEINGS
Human beings are like the white horse,
They are as strong as Orji tree,
They moves like,
The elephant and the moon,
They shines like the,
Sun and the stars,
But the,
Things that marvels me most,
Is our brains and our,
Discovering,
Tell the blacksmith that their,
Guns are okay,
Tell the doctors that they,
Telescopes are as active as a gun,
But,
Do not forget to tell the,
Engineers that their engines are
Still moving.
Tell the
Welders that I idolize their
Ships,
But do not forget to tell the
Scientists that their planes and
Their jets are OK.
Tell soul that he is now like
Abraham,
But tell the crusaders,
That he is now like the,
Preacher.
Tell,
The corrupt barristers to,
Reject that money,
For its better to work than to stay idol,
But tell the police that they,
Needs the hand of the blacksmith.
Tell the,
Soldiers that
They needs more booths,
But tell the poets that they,
Needs to write and go
To the prisoners.
Tell,
My president to implement the,
Citizen’s fundamental rights in his diary.
Tell,
The tailors that we needs,
More cloths,
But tell the engineers that,
We need more scissors.
Tell the horticulturists that
We needs more flowers,
But tell our mentor that,
We are In need of the sun and,
The moon.
Tell,
The agriculturist that we
Needs more foods,
But tell the engineers that we need fertilizers.
Tell,
The blacksmith that we are,
Needs more keys
But tell the goal keeper to
Catch them.
Tell,
The footballers to oppose
Red cards,
But tell the referees to,
Discourage and remove rough players,
Tell,
The pilots to operate very well
But tell a poet to stay
In the plane.
We needs more brains,
Tell the prayer warriors to pray more,
Tell the preachers,
That’s we need they preaching.
Tell,
The novelist to interview more,
Politicians,
But,
Tell the poets to edit their
Articles.
Tell the artists that,
We need their music.
THEMES
1. Brilliant, intelligent,
2. Wisdom,
3. Hardworking,
4. Repentant
5. Excellence
6. Cloth
Our newest entrant, our newest nation, forged in fiery code
Bubbled like red hot lava from a net of connected phones.
This nascent nation, transcending any boundary road,
Passing ports of entry into our domestic pleasure zones.
Is there no folly to consider here, no rampant beast?
Who, we ask, released it from its lair?
How long had this giddy, gyrating force been there?
Is there need, is there greed, is it time to despair?
Did that wingéd patron god of financial gain release
The beast, enabling the mean, to become the mode?
We sit comfy in computer chair, glazed in fluorescent glow,
We reboot, pass the word and wirelessly our blogs upload,
With our mouldering dark suspicions pushed far below.
For our new nation is a force for good, bull not bear,
A force for good, a force for all, a democratic lion to share.
Forces now darkly gather, looking in, rooting round
For sight or sound of hesitation, repetition or deviation.
After just one minute they think they’ve found,
Something wrong, something perplexing, defying gravitation.
Our new nation fights, fights hard for her Liberty.
Advocates and orators, lawyers and barristers rage,
Fanning the crackling flame of their inflated wage.
This Nation with no flag will not go back in her cage.
A migrant, an itinerant, but once met, here for perpetuity.
She has no planes, no ships, no boots on the ground,
No home front, no crying of havoc and barking dog,
The click, click, click, not gun but her keyboard sound.
Her defences invisible, as if lost in coastal fog.
We have this gift from others, a child to raise.
Chains she should not be in, Freedom must turn her page.
©Keith Murphy
On this subject of fair play, as War has had, its deathly day
Where once it had meaning, and came from the heart
Families moved on with a different start.
In Fairness and War
These rules were laid down
Where ever they fell
In cities and towns.
To tend the injured, or sick on land
To tend the injured, or sick at sea
To treat the prisoners of war as well
To treat us civilians in war yippee!!
Its civilian life that bears modern brunt
Families of taken that have to request their rights
Many a murder out of the theatres of War
What do these placed people take us for.
A store teller shot in the evening one night
The shooters the COWARDs, take hurried flight
They need not to run, if they were not there before
Intent of rob, what ever the score.
Once they are caught, cocky bastards they be
Honestly officer, it was'nt me
I was out of State, out of the Country
Before you pin it, what evidence have ye?
On many an occassion, the guilty are caught
Some schooled, some never taught
No reasons are given, as you ask them to say
What were their motives, on that given day.
The cocky will speak, as the solemn ones are quiet
The cocky ones open, where the quiet self riot
As they both look back, at the actions of they
Changes many lives i have to say.
It goes to court, in this Corporate world
Barristers, Lawyers playing human twirl
Dollars and Sterling to get these guys off
They are guilty as sin, as they silently scoff.
In many cases, in our SOCO scenes
The evidence is clear as it means
Yet many a killer, from many a scene
Lives for ever, if you know what i mean.
The fairness of a life for a life
A festered equation in this human strife
A family has lost a father and friend
His killers not on their journeys end
Instead they live for years to come
An incredible sentence for this deadly scum.
COLOR
Color is an agent,
Of beauty,
We use it in beautifying,
Our body.
It’s like flowers,
It’s used in decorating our
Buildings.
It’s like perfumes,
It add value to our,
Body, and it is attract the nature,
But when mixed with water,
It becomes like,
Soured soup.
It is like a,
White shirt,
When durst touches it,
It becomes like unclean
Tarpaulin,
Some are cleanable,
While some are unclean able
Oh!
Yee poets and barristers,
Tell the E.F.C.C and
The I.C.P.C,
That is better to pit on
Colorful cloths,
Then to go necked.
Tell,
The doctors not,
To be like Michael Jackson,
Tell the angelic not to,
Be like infant birds,
Tell the church worshipers,
Like Daniel Ogberi and his,
Wife to put on their,
Red hair cover,
Tell,
Pastor Chris Oyakilome to,
Put on his colorful white suit,
And his white shoes,
For it is better to change,
Our cream,
To change our body
THEMES
1. Changes
2. Seriousness
3. Unchangeable
4. Determination
5. Repentance
Written by poetOkonkwoVirginus.
COLOR
Color is an agent,
Of beauty,
We use it in beautifying,
Our body.
It’s like flowers,
It’s used in decorating our
Buildings.
It’s like perfumes,
It add value to our,
Body, and it is attract the nature,
But when mixed with water,
It becomes like,
Soured soup.
It is like a,
White shirt,
When durst touches it,
It becomes like unclean
Tarpaulin,
Some are cleanable,
While some are unclean able
Oh!
Yee poets and barristers,
Tell the E.F.C.C and
The I.C.P.C,
That is better to pit on
Colorful cloths,
Then to go necked.
Tell,
The doctors not,
To be like Michael Jackson,
Tell the angelic not to,
Be like infant birds,
Tell the church worshipers,
Like Daniel Ogberi and his,
Wife to put on their,
Red hair cover,
Tell,
Pastor Chris Oyakilome to,
Put on his colorful white suit,
And his white shoes,
For it is better to change,
Our cream,
To change our body
THEMES
1. Changes
2. Seriousness
3. Unchangeable
4. Determination
5. Repentance
Written by poet Virginus ndubuisi.
Alternative dispute resolution, said he
Barristers speak like that usually
Conciliation the outcome, we seek
During our meet, with the Beak
Evidence we have, evidently
Fraud is thick in the air, it is true
Grounds of recompense we pursue
Hearings will proceed
Indemnity achieved
Judging the Judge, goes with YOU!
Limerick 11
Lawyer/Barrister
Sponsored by Joseph May
10/1/2019
puppy licks himself all over
kitty wrestles with a bone
a horse jumps over the moon
a cow on the range is home
a snake sits next to Miss Muffet
a spider swallows a rock whole
Little Bo Peep loses her bears
a sheep gets engaged to a foal
animals normally don't act out of character
~ we humans design wigs for baldies and barristers
We members of the jury are stone faced
The judge in his chair was strait-laced
How would his decision go
Read on and you will know
So he's accused of a most terrible crime
If guilty he will be sent down for a long time
It's only he that knows the facts of that day
We the jury listen to what the barristers say
Barristers are smart they earn their money
If the matter is serious they'd make it funny
The summary by them has now been done
Facing a lifetime in jail or a lifetime of fun ?
We the jury took over three hours to decide
When the verdict was read he obviously cried
Being on a jury is hard that's certainly true
Whether he was guilty I will leave that to you
You can call us all, including our dog, your hero men
So when you need help quickly call 9/11
Rescue we try and save you we hope, from Gods sun filled heaven
but sometimes we lose out to the devil in this ash scattered hell
Climbing the steps and spraying the fire, that nobody's skin should've felt
Bringing you out, one by one, just hold on tight to my safety belt.
We are there to protect you, not to distress you
Dressed in blue, pistol and taser at side, all in full view
We arrest the speedsters, traffickers and all the gangsters
Let the judges decide if the sentence should incur extra time for visitors
Your lawyers, barristers and familiar jailbird friends
Will testify, use false alibi to get you off and to make amends.
We're racing to the scene with the medicine in the back
Inside bed, needles and portable CPR machine, just in case of a heart attack
We will revive the dead, patch up a sore head and even help mother with newborn
So let us through with ease and don't for a second put your hand on the horn
For one day, it might be you or your family or even a long lost friend
That is waiting for the moving medical miracle machine in the end.
We dress in disguise, mainly in tree green and dirt black
On the back of tanks, falling from the sky and we won't take any flak
We're here with orders from the guy at the top
So don't get upset at us, when we come back with a hop
We fight to protect the freedom of all mankind
Just doing our job and hoping not to leave, anybody behind.
. for public domain
Hidden on bookshelves
in Great British Halls,
where one thing's another,
or nothing at all,
Truth is well written,
but not spoken well
widely, for few
rarely read well.
It takes time to read well,
but who has the time,
between work, sleep, and prayer,
sips of Scotch or some wine?
No mind, no mind. Truth will out.
Barristers and Eggheads
are always about,
and we, adoze in our bed,
to our comfort we are wed
more than to our city and state.
And if it all should crumble?
Don't worry, it can wait.
before barristers
bone-busting brouhahas broached
barbaric bedlam
comely charwomen
cringed contemplating cruel
commonplace cudgelings
dank dungeons deterred
disorderly drunken dolts
dissuading dissent
(Alliteration)
07/25/2020
Let the Pens Flow - Alliteration Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Jenish Somadas