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valor's silhouette

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** For my dad, who did the best with what tools he was given ... I shall never know a better man, or one who has sacrificed so much for those he loves. If I were but a tenth of the man you are ... I love you. **

friendship - we have chased that apparition, endlessly, but it's elusive spirit - always beyond our fingers' reach. resentment, disappointment, heads thumped in anger, each of us in a role, obligatory - never had a chance ... oh, how I pleaded, many times, just to be your friend - tears perishing in the stream of lost hope between us. it is what it is, we are who we are, oil and water, thus. still, you have always been my hero, there's no other, the exemplar of character and integrity, innately kind, talented, brilliant, hard-working, and always altruistic, letting others, even friends, wittingly take advantage, rather than risk a slight or argument ... or alienation. goodness and decency were the edges of your sword, a gallant knight, willing to lay his life for friend OR foe. yet now my heart rends so for you, my dearest father, armor rusting in the rain, sword blunted, halted steed. and your faculties failing - that, the cruelest calamity ... but still, you push to stand tall for your beloved queen, and your squire is here, true, fain to shine your armor, 'til the bellman of Valhalla calls ... for it's most dear.

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Emile Pinet

Date: 4/11/2018 6:24:00 PM

Truth, fear, innocence and love lay silently within such words as these, waiting to be released by the magic of a poet's pen. One is swept away by the emotional flow... it's humbling as well as sad, to remember your father with bittersweet feelings of love. Very good job of creating a powerful emotional statement. The words you used to make your peace with these memories are an eloquent tribute to the love you hold for your father. Emile.

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 4/11/2018 10:26:00 PM

Thank you so much for the kind comments, Emile, I so greatly appreciate it my friend, and I'm so sorry I took up a slot in the contest that someone else should have had, if I had read the directions thoroughly like I should have. I'm so pleased you enjoyed this one ... it is very special to me. Blessings, My Friend! :-)

Sandra Haight

Date: 10/21/2017 8:01:00 PM

Brought tears to my eyes, Gregory...heartwrenching and soothing at the same time. Loved reading it, and congrats on your placement in the contest. Sandra

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 10/22/2017 2:33:00 PM

Thank you so very much, Sandra - this one is very special, (for obvious reasons), so I'm very pleased you liked it! :-)

Subimal Sinha-Roy

Date: 10/20/2017 10:30:00 PM

Congratulations on your win, Greg.

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 10/22/2017 2:30:00 PM

Thanks, Subimal - very kind of you!

Silent One

Date: 10/20/2017 4:40:00 PM

A great tribute to your dad Greg.. Congratulations on your placement in the contest..

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 10/22/2017 2:30:00 PM

Thanks so much, Silent One - much appreciated!

Darren White

Date: 9/20/2017 1:53:00 AM

Beautiful tribute, Greg (since when did you change to Gregory?) What can I say more than others already have? Only that I am here for you, you know that <3

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/20/2017 3:10:00 PM

Hey, Bud - yeah, some folks suggested that my name would sound a bit more "poetic" or professional if I listed it this way, so I changed it - no biggie, I'm still Greg! Thanks for the kind words - I haven't given up on chatting, just haven't had much time online of late, and haven't even written anything for a week now, (very unlike me). We SHALL chat soon, I am hopeful! :-)

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 9/18/2017 3:31:00 PM

Just read what you said to others in replies to their comments. Sorry about your dad dying and the heartache of not getting more that you wanted. Oh, I have so many stories I could tell you about my hubbie's own situation (as well as mine)!!

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/18/2017 9:12:00 PM

BUT, I think it's much better today, don't you? With millennials, I mean - I think people are freer to express emotion nowadays - cry, say "I love you" ... I tell my guy friends now that I love them, and that just wasn't done when I was young. I think we're getting there, though a ways to go. Please SoupMail me any time you'd like to chat, if you'd enjoy sharing! (Or on FB)

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/18/2017 8:57:00 PM

It seems to be a rather widely experienced issue, Andrea, if not common, even, (sadly). I'm one of the last "Baby-Boomers", and so from a generation that was raised to believe that "real men" don't show their emotions, and it was much MORE so when my dad was young - neither of his parents being affectionate - so there has been much for subsequent generations to overcome in that way.

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 9/18/2017 3:29:00 PM

Oh my goodness, Gregory, what splendid writing this is, and comparing him to a knight. that was brilliant. I can see how this got chosen as a top winner. big congrats and thanks for my win in your recent contest.

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/18/2017 8:54:00 PM

Thank you SO much, Andrea, that's very sweet of you ... you are always so kind to me, and I greatly appreciate it. I have made some wonderful friends here, and you are certainly one of those, (and I hope you'll consider me the same). Blessings! :-) <3

John Hamilton

Date: 9/17/2017 9:26:00 PM

It seems like it's a generational thing Greg, I tried my whole life to get his approval, love, attention but nothing, now he's dying and I forgave him, and echo the sentiments in this wonderful tribute to your father. It is comforting to me to know he did the best he could with what he was given, which was nothing!

John Hamilton
Date: 9/19/2017 1:40:00 PM

He never accepted that I was his son until I got a dna test when I turned 40 he said ok I guess that's that no hard feelings nothing personal. That was almost 20 years ago and finally he accepted me. It was tough!

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/17/2017 11:06:00 PM

My mom was the opposite, and I broke the chain with my kids, so much to be thankful for, but I don't think I'll ever lose all the anger and pain. Much healing took place with that simple phrase. Thank you for your comment, Brother - the more I learn about you, the more alike we are! :-)

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/17/2017 11:05:00 PM

My Dad is dying, too, John, and while I have also forgiven, I will never hear the words "I am proud of you, Son" ... it took 59 years to hear "I love you", but I am so thankful. His parents were BOTH that way - cold, unaffectionate, non-vocal - so I don't blame him, but that doesn't help the hurt, or the longing for a "daddy".

Agnes Krampe

Date: 9/16/2017 9:10:00 PM

That's a strong poem, with lots of emotion, but without sentimentality. I am sorry that he could not be the father you wished for, but glad you were able to tell him your love before it is too late. Hugs.

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/16/2017 11:03:00 PM

That's very sweet of you, Agnes, I greatly appreciate it! Blessings to you, friend! :-) <3

Eve Roper

Date: 9/16/2017 7:10:00 PM

The poem is fabulous, congratulations on your awesome win, Greg... Eve ~`*

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/17/2017 10:58:00 PM

Thank you so much - he's my favorite knight, and I'm sure he would have been one had he been born at that time.

Eve Roper
Date: 9/17/2017 3:45:00 PM

Sorry, I am a lover of knights and still awesome poem ..

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/16/2017 11:02:00 PM

I think this was meant for the first place poet, Eve, (my name is Greg), but I thank you just the same. :-)

Lin Lane

Date: 9/16/2017 1:01:00 PM

Your pen, as a sword, is not rusted. Well done, Greg.

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/16/2017 10:59:00 PM

Thank you so much, Lin - I'm pleased you liked it! :-) <3

Craig Cornish

Date: 9/16/2017 12:23:00 PM

A powerfully emotional write with feeling so many of us can share Greg. I pray you will share this with him---it is worthy for sure.

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/16/2017 10:47:00 PM

I'm considering sharing it with him, Craig, thank you ... and I so appreciate the kind placement, very pleased this one was appreciated, as it's from the heart! Blessings! :-)

Silent One

Date: 9/16/2017 11:43:00 AM

Wow... a real deep write Greg.. This is a winner to me..

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/16/2017 10:46:00 PM

Very kind of you, S1 - thanks so much!

Dale Gregory Cozart

Date: 9/16/2017 10:32:00 AM

Beautifully, movingly written. Congrats on your win.

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/16/2017 10:45:00 PM

Thank you so much, Dale, very kind of you, my friend! :-)

Winged Warrior

Date: 9/16/2017 10:27:00 AM

Back to Congrats!!! my friend...god bless...^WW^

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/16/2017 10:44:00 PM

Thank you so much, W2 - greatly appreciated! :-)

John Michaels

Date: 9/15/2017 12:42:00 PM

Powerful and emotional write, Greg. Such a sad story, but hopefully there's still time for you to add a few more chapters with your Father. All the best, John.

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/15/2017 1:57:00 PM

I wish that were true, John, but he is dying ... he knows I love him and vice-versa, and that's the important thing at this point. Thank you for the kind words, my friend! :-)

Thvia Shetley

Date: 9/14/2017 10:40:00 PM

I too, was touched by this piece. My father and I were estranged for 14 years as I was unforgiving of what I felt were his shortcomings as a parent. Then one day I realized he did the very best he could with what he had and who he was. Forgiveness was a non issue after that, there was nothing to forgive anymore. I'm glad I came into this wisdom before it was too late. Thank you for this well written piece.

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/14/2017 10:54:00 PM

Pretty much exactly what happened with me, Thvia - My dad was an amazing provider, giving us opportunities that many kids didn't have, but I never knew him - still don.t - and he never touched me, never spent time with me, just resented me cuz I was the one my mom turned to for affection, (cuz he couldn't give it) ... and I've always resented him cuz he wanted nothing to do with me. But BOTH his parents were cold like that, so he was never taught those skills - never had those tools. I'll never know what it's like to have "Daddy", but I was blessed in other ways. He's failing quickly now and I decided that all that really mattered was letting him know how thankful I am and how much I love him for the good man he is.

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/14/2017 10:54:00 PM

When I told him, he said it back to me "I love you, too, son", something I've waited for my whole life, and ever since I've been thinking if maybe I'd said it long ago, it might have made a difference. Oh, he would never have changed into what I needed as a child, but maybe we could have at least been friends in our own way. I ended the chain with my kids, and decided to hug and kiss them until they asked me to stop, and you know what? They never asked, and they're all (almost) in their 30's ... they still call me "Daddy", and I love it - the most beautiful word in the world! Blessings, friend - all that matters is love, and there comes a time when we have to let the rest go, (anger, resentment, grudges, hurt feelings), cuz all it is is a thief! :-)

Constance La France

Date: 9/14/2017 11:27:00 AM

Greg, your poem touched my heart deeply . Outstanding write. There was a point in my life when my father became my friend and not just my Dad.. .

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/14/2017 8:32:00 PM

Thank you SO very much, BW, I'm so glad you enjoyed this one ... and I'm so glad to hear you reached that level with your dad. My dad and I will never be close, but we each know the other's heart, and that our love for one-another is genuine. That's the most important thing - blessings, my friend!

Winged Warrior

Date: 9/14/2017 10:56:00 AM

A beautiful touching entry my friend...a true testament for your father...best of luck Greg...although a winner in my book...god bless...^WW^

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/14/2017 8:30:00 PM

Thank you very much, my friend, I so appreciate the kind words! Blessings!

Cheryl Hoffman

Date: 9/14/2017 7:48:00 AM

A clever touching tribute to your father Greg! Good luck in the contest my friend!~Che :)

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/14/2017 8:29:00 PM

That's very kind of you, Cheryl, thank you so much! I'm pleased you liked it! :-) <3

Charlie Smith

Date: 9/13/2017 11:26:00 PM

Brilliant write Greg, best wishes...

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/14/2017 4:27:00 AM

Thank you so much, Charlie - that's so kind of you - I'm glad you enjoyed it, friend! :-)

Heidi Sands

Date: 9/13/2017 10:21:00 AM

This is an excellent tribute to your father Greg. Very well written. It really reaches the reader too. I can feel it. :)

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/14/2017 4:26:00 AM

That's very kind of you to say, Heidi, and I so appreciate the comment - blessings, Friend! <3

Robert Lindley

Date: 9/13/2017 9:49:00 AM

A TRULY EXCEPTIONAL AND GLEAMING GEM MY FRIEND. I am so very glad to have found and read this magnificent creation ! Adding this wonderful and fantastic father's tribute poem to my fav list...

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/14/2017 4:25:00 AM

That's so kind of you, my friend, and I greatly appreciate it - so pleased you enjoyed this one, cuz it was tough to write - very emotional. Blessings!

Kim Rodrigues

Date: 9/13/2017 9:42:00 AM

A wonderful tribute to your father. My husband and son butted heads for many years. Now they too are friends. You lovely last line! <3

Kim Rodrigues
Date: 9/14/2017 6:15:00 AM

That in itself is healing. blessings, Greg! <3 Kim

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/14/2017 4:24:00 AM

Thank you so much, Kim - my father and I will never be friends, sadly, but I have at least told him how I feel and that I love him, and he did so as well. Much healing! <3

Russell Sivey

Date: 9/13/2017 7:54:00 AM

This is so beautiful Greg! I am in awe of this incredible write my friend! I truly enjoyed reading your amazing poem here this morning! You have surely written a magnificent and heartfelt poem, Great Work!!

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 9/14/2017 4:23:00 AM

Blessings, Brother, I'm so pleased you like this one, and you once again made me smile! I owe you an email - coming soon! :-)