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To Mock Butterflies

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For the 'shadows contest' by Regina.

To mock butterflies was written to raise awareness of a condition called Misophonia. I do not suffer from it. Many do not realise they have it.

Misophonia is a condition where a person has a severe sensitivity to specific soft sounds and visual images. When a person hears the sounds, the person has a very strong emotional reaction such as hate, anger, anxiety, rage, and resentment and physiological distress. Can be simple sounds like breathing and chewing or a tap running.

https://www.webmd.com/mental-health/what-is-misophonia#:~:text=Misophonia%20is%20a%20disorder%20in,and%20the%20need%20to%20flee.

My existence seems like a timeless tragedy, ticking away in the harmony of misophonia and me. I've been reluctantly raised in the arms of trauma, hiding from the darkness looking over my shoulder. I place a metaphorical knife under my pillow, as I fear the biggest bully in my mind's playground. Sound is like a sadistic samurai slashing at my sanity, as innocent echoes become the euphonious chant of despondency. An eldritch echo of anguish triggering anxiety, a constant conflict between the shadows and the soul, narrating a sorrowful story in each tear I shed, but I'm shouting into the void of ignorance, no one understands why I've bled. Each breath is like a riddle, each munch and crunch tasting like monotonous moments of meaningless screeching, erupting into an earthquake of emotions. Nobody understands the chaos from within, thinking I'm a little bit crazy. I search for a sanctuary where peace meets me at sunrise, where screams of a sonorous mind are not shattered in fragments of estrangement, portrayed through the plentiful imagery of pain. I yearn to live a life mocking butterflies, to flutter in the flakes of eternal slumber. begging to lose the blessings of perception, as all I hear is evil voices chattering from within. Silence is a poison I'm willing to take, yet I'm cursed by misophonian lullabies. I wish to remain isolated within mental muteness, as I know you will live forever in me.

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Susan Ashley

Date: 4/21/2024 12:07:00 PM

Dear Silent One, you tackled this unusual topic with your usual expressive poetic finesse (that stirs the poetic soul), alliterations (which stirs the imagination) and creative imageries (that stirs the emotions) giving one a real sense of the despair and disorientation one must experience with Misophonia. Your poem is a shining gem and your poet's note is very informative. Congratulations for your well-deserved trophy win in Empress's contest. Warmest wishes my inspiring friend.. ~Susan

Karen Jones

Date: 2/8/2024 2:29:00 AM

Congratulations on your win!

Paula Goldsmith

Date: 2/7/2024 11:48:00 AM

Congratulations on your win. An amazing write. On Soup we learn so much about life through the different poets. Have a blessed day writing away....................

John Lawless

Date: 2/6/2024 3:50:00 PM

"silence is a poison I'm willing to take"... That line just grabbed me in its sharpness SO,

Ink Empress

Date: 2/6/2024 7:30:00 AM

Well, you know exactly what i would like, a poem with a purpose, raising awareness on a subject that needs to be read more! Thank you for entering this to my contest. As can see from comments, see i loved it. So just want to say. Congratulations on your well deserved win! Youve nailed it!

Sara Kendrick

Date: 9/28/2023 7:28:00 AM

Creative way to go with this one. I was once very sensitive to sound/s but my hearing is not what it used to be so not bothered as much anymore. I did not have it to the extent that some people are affected especially like maybe some autistic children/people are affected. Reads like a good contender to me for the contest. Way to go. Your visit to my page was uplifting. Sara

I Am Anaya

Date: 9/24/2023 6:03:00 PM

"To mock butterflies was written to raise awareness of a condition called Misophonia. I do not suffer from it. Many do not realize they have it."---SO. (that's in case a few readers missed that). Audio hallucinations are vaguely suppressed with pills, I get it is dire for some. Others through busy schedule's hide it, but damn if they think it's not forever. Misophonia as poetry at its best, I already know so much just exploring the light you share. T.Y. for educating us, S O. ~grateful. Bol

Karen Jones

Date: 9/23/2023 1:03:00 PM

Your ability to empathize empower and then pen while entertaining and educating is so amazing. So many fav lines. I love this.

Michelle Dosanjh-Johal

Date: 9/22/2023 9:27:00 PM

Wow, this poem is brilliant on so many levels... it's depth and emotion, beautiful use of alliteration and the way you weave words so beautifully. It honestly can be used to express so many conditions of mental health. It actually made me think of my own son, and so it hit me at a very deep and emotional level. Bravo.

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 1:29:00 AM

Poetry is powerful.when people relate to it..Thank you for your feedback

Valsa George

Date: 9/22/2023 8:46:00 PM

A powerful poem stirring with overflowing emotons. "Sound is like a sadistic samurai slashing at my sanity, as innocent echoes become the euphonious chant of despondency." Hope this is fictional or do you really suffer from misophonia? If real, I can imagine the trauma you are going through. But rejoice at your exceptional ability to express your mental condition in such a powerful way.Even a medical book cannot explain it so well... ! You are never crazy, but exceptionally gifted, dear poet friend !

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 1:29:00 AM

Thanks you Valsa..I do not suffer from it but I know people who do..

Nancy Kaufman

Date: 9/22/2023 2:13:00 PM

Dear Silent One, What a super intense piece this is. I empathize with any one who suffers from what sounds like an horrific condition. Thanks so much for your clarification on my little ghost write and best wishes in this very emotive piece here.

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 1:28:00 AM

Thanks you..its very sad as most don't leave home due to it

Joe Dimino

Date: 9/22/2023 2:02:00 PM

"Each breath is like a riddle, each munch and crunch tasting like monotonous moments of meaningless screeching, erupting into an earthquake of emotions." -- Wow! Very emotive, stirring verse. Super good. We are double minded, our flesh of two verses, the dark and light. Sometimes I think, the joke is on us, we game fields for Godly jesting. Deafening trumpeting and canon fire. A maddening condition you are dealing with. Great honest, inspiring read. Thank you.

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 1:28:00 AM

Thanks for your review Joe..I do not suffer from it, but I know people who do..

Mystic Rose Rose

Date: 9/22/2023 1:21:00 PM

wow, that is so sad, and must be hard to live with S O, I see a top contender here, my friend, you get an A for great depth and understand, :)

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 1:23:00 AM

Thank you

Joseph May

Date: 9/22/2023 11:47:00 AM

Thanks for sharing Silent, I never knew of this condition before, it must be very difficult to live with this, When silence is the only refuge from the emotional chaos that sounds bring

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 1:20:00 AM

I imagine it must be for so many..Thanks Jo

Anne-Lise Andresen

Date: 9/22/2023 11:45:00 AM

- "No one understands the chaos inside, no one understands why I've bled" ... not easy to understand for people who have never felt this - "An eldritch echo of anguish triggering anxiety" ... "thinking I'm a little bit crazy" - ( knife under my pillow :) - I have a chainsaw under the bed :))) - Crazy...no not at all :) - A serious topic, S.O. ... thank you for sharing this ... excellently written :) - Have a lovely weekend :) - hugs

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 1:19:00 AM

A chainsaw lol..you must have a big pillow then...Thank you for you comment

Sam Kauffman

Date: 9/22/2023 10:43:00 AM

So powerful, SO. As always your alliteration, imagery and personification sail through every line giving texture and depth to your words in a poetic cadence. Thank you for bringing to light this painful condition and putting it into an amazing poetic context! Your lines like "silence is poison I'm willing to take" have a punch that brings moments of thoughtful meditation! Sending you blessings and gratitude!

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 1:17:00 AM

Thank you Sam. Appreciate your visit

Tom Woody

Date: 9/22/2023 7:20:00 AM

I can't help wonder if it's related to autism, since those who suffer have some of the same experiences. In any case you expertly and poetically brought to light the syndrome as well as the accompanying torments. I've always said that poetry should entertain, inform, stir emotions. Yours covers all the bases

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 1:16:00 AM

They say that although some people with autism will have this condition there are many who are not autistic who suffer...

Hiya Sharma

Date: 9/22/2023 6:22:00 AM

Misophonia is a complex condition and you've absolutely well-interpreted the situation in your brilliantly poetic words. I'm always awestruck by the way you can deliver such emotive and deep topics in your writes, whilst also meticulously crafting profound phrases... Those alliterations and wordplay throughout just makes one feel the vulnerability, ache and angst to the heart's core! There are so many lines that I loved here "I place a metaphorical knife under my pillow" Beyond evocative!

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 1:15:00 AM

Thank you Hiya...

Hiya Sharma
Date: 9/22/2023 6:25:00 AM

"Each breath is like a riddle" Ahh, palpable.. "I yearn to live a life mocking butterflies" The frustration when nobody understands what's happening and they live in a perpetual state of melancholy, misunderstood by others.. A marvelous write, Silent One. Best of luck for the contest!!

Vijay Pandit

Date: 9/22/2023 5:31:00 AM

Life must be unbearable for those who suffer from misophonia --especially when the sounds trigger emotional responses. Silence is a poison I'm willing to take, yet I'm cursed by misophonian lullabies. I wish to remain isolated within mental muteness, as I know you will live forever in me---they feel it. Splendidly conveyed, SO.

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 1:14:00 AM

Thanks Vijay

Maria Williams

Date: 9/22/2023 5:20:00 AM

Misophonia, gosh, another condition I've only just heard about through this in-depth poem of yours. There are so many. The sound is like a sadistic samurai slashing at my sanity wow. A ticking clock or a slightly dripping tap would be very disconcerting. I applaud your literary skills and dramatic lines to make us aware of this sad condition. Brilliant as always S1 Hugs

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 1:14:00 AM

There are many conditions now that are related to neurological impact..thank you for your kind words

Sotto Poet

Date: 9/22/2023 4:46:00 AM

Dear friend Silent, Such a wonderful fictional writing presenting the existence of an eternal tale of sorrow, resonating with the discordant symphony of misophonia. Drifting amidst nostalgic recollections of blissful and carefree youth, your linguistic prowess and boundless intellect shine unparalleled. Your ability to capture the essence of misophonia with such eloquence and grace. Your employment of metaphors and vivid language surpasses perfection, creating a seamless and captivating flow.

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 1:13:00 AM

Thank you Sotto

Ink Empress

Date: 9/22/2023 1:19:00 AM

“I place a metaphorical knife under my pillow” whoa what a line. You’ve written so well about Misophonia, and the challenges, in such sheer eloquence that no one else can do, about something as haunting. Your use of metaphors and descriptive wordplay here is beyond impeccable! And the flow is seamless. Your poetic skills always leave me in awe! “ silence is a poison im willing to take “ i love that line so much shows how much individuals with Misophonia long for complete silence. As always your-

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 1:13:00 AM

Thank you for your wonderful feedback. Many suffer from this condition without knowing and it has different levels to it..

Ink Empress
Date: 9/22/2023 1:24:00 AM

Alliterations are right on point! So good! No one understands, not many do, and not many are even aware of how this condition works or affects individuals so this isnt just poetic and soul hitting but very insightful and would raise awareness too, i always love a poem that is written on important subjects that needs more awareness. And every line here is just articulated with such artistic and creative phrases that just left me in awe! You have an empathetic mind clearly, not many can put their selves in someone else’s shoes to understand and deliver such strong emotions! I loved reading this profound write woven meticulously! Goodluck for the contest too …

Alexis Y.

Date: 9/22/2023 12:28:00 AM

WoW! Silent, You have such a gift and talent for writing. Your pen never ceases to amaze me. This line “ I search for a sanctuary where peace meets me at sunrise,” Stood out to me. You have such a way with words. Thanks for the side note on” Misophonia” I found it to be so educational. It's heartbreaking to hear that people suffer from such a condition. This is a winner on so many levels. Best wishes in the contest:-)Alexis

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 3:35:00 AM

Hey Alexis thank you for your lovely comment..