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Pierced Heart

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Cutting, callous, cold Cruelly, so cruelly you stand there laughing at me You tell me I’m useless Your words cut through me like a blade p i e r c i n g my fragile heart Again and again you repeat those vitriolic words Cutting my very being into a m i l l i o n p i e c e s My tears drip like vermilion blood oozing from the gaping void that once occupied my chest I stand before you Stripped of my dignity Helpless, bruised and battered I cannot believe what was once love has turned to hate Poet's notes I had seldom written anything other than rhyme so this was a real deviation to venture into the dark side of my muse with a creative free verse. n/a in contest sponsored By Nina 26th February 2015

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Gregory Richard Barden

Date: 11/6/2017 12:37:00 AM

Congratulations on your wonderfully dark win, Jan - blessings, and keep up the great work! :-)

Jan Allison
Date: 11/6/2017 4:51:00 AM

Thanks so much Greg:-) hugs jan xx

Afzal Nusker

Date: 10/27/2017 10:46:00 PM

I love the way you formatted this dark gem. Congratulations!

Jan Allison
Date: 10/28/2017 5:38:00 AM

Thanks Afzal it is a very dark poem for me, i much prefer to write humour:-) hugs jan xx

Eve Roper

Date: 10/27/2017 9:03:00 PM

Wonderful and deep heartfelt poem, Jan, congratulations on your win. Hugs eve ~`*

Jan Allison
Date: 10/28/2017 5:37:00 AM

Thanks Eve, I shock myself with some of my darker writes I never know what will flow from my pen:-) hugs jan xx

Kim Rodrigues

Date: 10/27/2017 5:01:00 PM

Such a great write, Jan! Congrats! <3 K8m

Jan Allison
Date: 10/27/2017 5:03:00 PM

Thanks Kim:-) hugs jan xx

Dale Gregory Cozart

Date: 10/27/2017 2:13:00 PM

Awesome, Jan! Congrats on your win!

Jan Allison
Date: 10/27/2017 2:36:00 PM

I look back on my earlier works and am amazed I can write such deep dark stuff. i just did a couple of alterations for this contest, mainly to the formatting of a few lines lol:-) hugs jan xx

Brian Davey

Date: 10/27/2017 1:03:00 PM

What an amazing and creative layout and we'll penned, congrats Jan

Jan Allison
Date: 10/27/2017 2:34:00 PM

Thanks Brian:-) I tweaked it slightly I'd only been writing a year when i originally wrote this poem and had forgotten all about it until i looked for a dark poem for the contest:-) hugs jan xx

John Hamilton

Date: 10/27/2017 9:21:00 AM

Another win with this pain filled emotive write, congrats Jan, well done!

Jan Allison
Date: 10/27/2017 10:13:00 AM

Thanks John, I wrote this a long time ago and edit it for the contest, I'm so glad LuLoo liked it:-) hugs jan xx

Bl Devnath

Date: 3/6/2015 8:56:00 PM

An excellent poem adorned with acute passion of heart, outstanding. 7++ i feel here. Loved always my lovely friend,bl

Jan Allison
Date: 3/7/2015 4:35:00 AM

Thanks BL:-) Hugs Jan xx

Paul Callus

Date: 2/28/2015 10:43:00 AM

This is very strongly worded, Jan! Nothing worse than being stripped of dignity...and in life nobody is useless. Poetry is an ideal safety valve. hugs // paul

Jan Allison
Date: 2/28/2015 10:48:00 AM

I have to go with my muse Paul - this is a deep sad poem - there is only about 2 lines from the actual original write the rest just flowed:-) Hugs Jan xx

James Fraser

Date: 2/27/2015 1:46:00 PM

Powerfully deep poetry at it's best. The more one reads, the more it impresses. Love it Jan, hugs, James :) xx

Jan Allison
Date: 2/27/2015 1:47:00 PM

So unlike my normal style James - i'm hurting at the moment and the only way I can deal with it is by writing:-) Hugs jan xx

Phyllis Babcock

Date: 2/27/2015 12:46:00 PM

Wow this is awesome. You capture the feelings of one stripped of dignity so well. Griping piece. love phyl

Jan Allison
Date: 2/27/2015 1:14:00 PM

Thanks Phyllis - it is very very different from my usual poems:-) Hugs Jan xx

Tim Ryerson

Date: 2/27/2015 4:30:00 AM

To HECK with the syllable count! This is a winner in my book...VERY compelling write concerning verbal/physical abuse and dying love...I think you should re-post the original as well...Have a GREAT weekend and God bless - Tim

Jan Allison
Date: 2/27/2015 6:09:00 AM

The original was written last year and was basically for a contest where we have to write and be nasty to PD - it is not appropriate to repost it now - it was such a dark dark write for me written not long after dad's terminal diagnosis so I guess I was hurting through that and my vitriol spilled out through my pen - am happy with this write - it expresses how I feel with the current hurt I am feeling.Hugs Jan xx

Demetrios Trifiatis

Date: 2/27/2015 1:11:00 AM

One feels the knife piercing the heart as the emotions mount to an explosive level of agony and regret, dear Jan! Powerful!

Jan Allison
Date: 2/27/2015 2:05:00 AM

thanks Demetrios - i have to express my emotions through my writing and sadly this is how I feel at the moment:-( hugs jan xx

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 2/26/2015 10:54:00 PM

This is what betrayal feels like Jan, and you know it all too well. I didn't realize the pierced contest had some kind of rules for syllable count. I will have to read it again. this is a great post you did today, jan. And why did you ever remove it? poetry is about strong emotion of any kind!

Jan Allison
Date: 2/27/2015 2:04:00 AM

this is a re hash of a poem I wrote in June Andrea - the other one was so deep and dark - not like anything i have ever written before - this has a few lines from the original :-( i think the pierced contest going to be too hard for me to do with All lines – the same syllable count. :-) hugs Jan xx

James Peranteau

Date: 2/26/2015 8:09:00 PM

I'm glad that you reposted it Jan...There's def. a crack in the heart I hear in this write dear poet...I wouldn't delete this again ! Thanks for sharing it....and I gotta see the write from yesterday...your Limerick....I was out for some humor tonight ! Have a blessed night........much love, james

Jan Allison
Date: 2/26/2015 8:14:00 PM

This is a very much changed poem James - this and the original are far removed from my normal style - I prefer humour but i am hurting so badly and with writing it helps release my emotions:-) Hugs Jan xx I have many humourous writes - lettuce pray and just desserts are amongst my favourites from my early writes just a year ago:-) hugs Jan xx

Shane Cooper

Date: 2/26/2015 4:53:00 PM

This is not your normal cup of tea as far as I can see. It is a very dark and painfilled write. Your words create a stark image of dispair and suffering on your part that cannot be bourne. Your use of the words "You tell me I am useless" has a deep meaning for me and I can feel the pain you write in my own heart. I think you have written a great peice but this time I have to appologise that l cannot Fav. it as it causes me distress. love Shane xxx

Jan Allison
Date: 2/26/2015 6:40:00 PM

Shane I write from the heart - I will say no more but my heart has been shattered and I will have to find the strength to bounce back but I am hurting like I have never hurt before:-( Hugs Jan xx remember if you write a poem and don't like it don't delete it save it in a file and go back to it - even if you only use one or two words from it.

Eileen Manassian

Date: 2/26/2015 2:07:00 PM

OH JAN! You are so versatile. This is testament to that. Amazing. You really got me with this write....If it is fictional, then WOW! How you capture those feelings if phenomenal!

Jan Allison
Date: 2/26/2015 6:37:00 PM

It was based on a poem I wrote in June for PD's contest and Darren got me to remove it as it was so unlike 'me' I write from the heart - I will say no more but my heart has been shattered and I will have to find the strength to bounce back but I am hurting - this wound runs oh so deep Eileen:-( Hugs Jan xx

Shadow Hamilton

Date: 2/26/2015 2:06:00 PM

the hurt and anger floods out of this pen Jan but you are a strong person and you will prevail of this I am sure. There is no way in this world that you are useless this was only said to cause hurt and grief and the person who said and did this to you is the one who is useless and a very small minded person hugs 7

Jan Allison
Date: 2/26/2015 6:32:00 PM

Thanks Shadow -I write from the heart - I will say no more but my heart has been shattered and I will have to find the strength to bounce back but I am hurting:-( Hugs Jan xx

Janet Eaton

Date: 2/26/2015 1:53:00 PM

Jan, such raw emotion. Very good write. You so amaze me with your talents. ^7^ Hugs Janet

Jan Allison
Date: 2/26/2015 6:32:00 PM

the original was written in June - it was so unlike anything I had written before and when i posted it my poetry partner Darren said it was so unlike 'me' I removed it - Olive I write from the heart - I will say no more but my heart has been shattered and I will have to find the strength to bounce back but I am hurting:-( Hugs Jan xx

Iris E. S-Lewis

Date: 2/26/2015 1:44:00 PM

Ooh, for love so cruel and kind. But Jan, you have painted a better picture than he, who has done dirt to love.

Jan Allison
Date: 2/26/2015 6:30:00 PM

Iris I write from the heart - I will say no more but my heart has been shattered and I will have to find the strength to bounce back but I am hurting:-( Hugs Jan xx

Tim Smith

Date: 2/26/2015 1:00:00 PM

I do remember your other poem....you've made it even better Jan...very realistic.... Hugs Tim

Jan Allison
Date: 2/26/2015 6:29:00 PM

Yes Tim it was for PD's contest and Darren read it and said it was so unlike 'me' so I removed it but I write from the heart - I will say no more but my heart has been shattered and I will have to find the strength to bounce back but I am hurting:-( Hugs Jan xx

Frederic Parker

Date: 2/26/2015 9:50:00 AM

A very emotional poem straight to the gut

Jan Allison
Date: 2/26/2015 6:26:00 PM

It cuts like a knife Frederic - I write from the heart - I will say no more but my heart has been shattered and I will have to find the strength to bounce back but I am hurting:-( Hugs Jan xx

Richard Lamoureux

Date: 2/26/2015 9:46:00 AM

This is sheer emotion! Well done.

Jan Allison
Date: 2/26/2015 6:26:00 PM

Richard I write from the heart - I will say no more but my heart has been shattered and I will have to find the strength to bounce back but I am hurting:-( Hugs Jan xx

Robert Lindley

Date: 2/26/2015 9:30:00 AM

Does not matter if it meets a contest requirement, it is still an awesome poem! A7 and your blood shows in this fine write!

Jan Allison
Date: 2/26/2015 6:22:00 PM

Robert I write from the heart - I will say no more but my heart has been shattered and I will have to find the strength to bounce back but I am hurting:-( Hugs Jan xx

Casarah Nance

Date: 2/26/2015 9:18:00 AM

Wow! Intense, I love to see this side of your skill, so vivid! We all have the taint in our soul and your have bled yours all over us and it is incredible. :) You're awesome !

Jan Allison
Date: 2/26/2015 6:22:00 PM

Cas I write from the heart - I will say no more but my heart has been shattered and I will have to find the strength to bounce back but I am hurting:-( Hugs Jan xx