A constipated Canuck named Rory
took an atomic suppository.
It exploded his guts
and they soon found his nuts
somewhere in the Yukon Territory!
Do you remember when you told me that story
of all the Planets in the sky and how they all
had different jobs and had different people they
were in charge of? That Uranus was a magician
and he was friends with all the squirrels and mice
or that Neptune was a mystic and for half a dollar
he could tell me how I’d die and I said that I’d rather
save the half a dollar to buy a gumball and watch
the pink or blue or yellow orb roll down the runway
until it hit the metal door of the dispenser with a clink.
I remember you laughed at that. I remember that your
stories would shrink the miles and the hours down
into manageable parts until the eighteen hour road trip
ended in Des Moines and you said, exhausted,
Saturn was the bringer of Old Age but that you
hypothesized that if we stayed in the car and just
kept driving that Saturn would just get tired
and leave us alone so we packed up and took
the nearest exit for the Yukon Territory. You
looked beautiful then, basking in Saturn’s rage
and you still haven’t aged a damn day.
Talented individuals hail from British Columbia.
Some others come from Quebec and Alberta.
A few call their homes Ontario or Manitoba.
They may come from as far as the Yukon Territory.
People from the true north strong and free
write some very impressive poetry.
We have a few of them on our site.
I always check to see what they write.
Reading their work often proves to be a delight.
Sourtoe Martini
The newest trend in cocktails?
Severed human toes!
It’s the latest thing in the Yukon
Not that everybody knows
But now that the Wall Street Journal
Has given it some class
The Sourtoe martini
Is in every other glass
It started forty years ago
In the Yukon territory
Captain “River Rat” Stevenson
Likes to tell the story
He found a severed big toe
Preserved in a pickle jar
And rather than just throw it out
Thought he’d serve it at his bar
For this drink would show their macho
This drink would show their nerve
So he dropped it in a champagne glass
In a drink that he would serve
The rule of the Sourtoe
The toe must touch your lips
It’s not a drink you just chug down
It’s best taken in small sips
While it may sound unsanitary
The toes are pickled first for months
In medically approved alcohol
That the patron then confronts
You can order it any time you like
At the Sourdough Saloon
But you won’t find me at the bar
At least any time real soon
For I am not a drinker
Ask anyone who knows
For alcohol and I don’t mix
And I don’t kiss stranger’s toes
Mdailey 11/6/12
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