Umpire Poems | Examples


List of Member Poems

Premium Member walking back past the umpire

i was always a batter
in middle-age, i've become a bowler
to my son, who is now a batter
and i find myself being forced to bowl
in this adults-only cricket match
and for the first time,
i am walking back past the umpire
we exchange words
smiles
titters

and this understanding and linkage is new to me.
i feel absolute joy

Premium Member Batter to Umpire

You wear a chest protector and a clicker,
and while I don't mean to bicker,
a whole new world could come into view.
I say this confidentially to you,
in the hopes you get my gist, 
and visit an optometrist.

Premium Member The End of an Umpire

  
   The umpire had a temper
   The emperor, he did too

   They got together

   The ump called the emp out
   The emp called his soldiers in


Election Problem: the Court; the Umpire; Party and the Masses

WHAT THEY SAID:
MASSES: Our votes must count!
AREA BOYS: We only know our pay master, the originator of stomach infrastructure
PARTY MANIFESTOS:
LP: You won't labour in vain
PDP: When we were in charge, we were the biggest economy in Africa
APC: We will "cushion" the effects of subsidy removal and increase "minimum" wage.
THE UMPIRE:
Bimodal voter accreditation system (BVAS) and Viewing portal (IREV), are both "game changers!"
We "shall" UPLOAD, and TRANSMIT "results" immediately
The electoral process will be "FREE, FAIR and TRANSPARENT."
THE PRESS:
(A)
We have noticed election malfeasance, like: vote buying, voter suppression and intimidation
THE PRESS
(B)
Elections haven't started, but reports say "results are already being announced" in Nasarara
THE PRESS
(C)
Sources say "ballot boxes" just "arrived" Kogri at Noon
THE PRESS AND MASSES in UNISON:
Which one comes first, the results or the election?
THE UMPIRE: You reserve the right to go to court
THE COURT:
Ours is to "AFFIRM" victory and "DISMISS" noise makers.

Empire On Fire

The dead ambitious in The Empire
Wrecked her, when they began to aspire
To The Top that would Intrigue inspire:
When dreamt they to ascend Sky-High Spire,
Soon finding out they could just conspire
Against their Emperor and Umpire
If not him crush good, cause to expire…

And this badly hit the empire:
At work, few with a will to perspire;
Only scallywags with ease respire
A Once-Splendid Once-Glorious Empire
In which was found Much-Treasured Sapphire
Just like that ‘enveloped in great fire.

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