Tooted Poems - Poems about Tooted

...Alien talk I can’t understand A Pifflewig performed a handstand He verbalised through his ass Gross putrid wind he did pass Like many blokes throughout the land! I farted, perhaps ......Read the rest...

...There is a legend of a cowboy down in Texas To whom they give the sobriquet of Pecos Bill. It's said he rooted and he tooted As across the plains he scooted, Stetsoned, jeaned, bowlegged, and boo......Read the rest...

...Let’s have a picnic I said! All eager and stuff. My refrigerator was bare, which was a bit rough. By the time my guest arrived I had baked beans and ham. And a surprise guest, my flatulent grandma......Read the rest...

...The cheese ball was delicious but on Christmas Eve at the sleepover bro tooted without reprieve sister cried, " please use the washroom, Steve " " Sorry sis, "it's a lonely fart that I......Read the rest...

...Fannie Strumpet is a flatulent floozy With each wiggle her rump lets out a doozy She blows out so much gas Foul vapor from her a$$ It's asphyxiating and makes me woozy Fannie lets 'em rip with......Read the rest...

...There was an old lady from Ghent Who tooted wherever she went Sent up a cloud Sometimes quite loud And she never attracted a gent. written July 10, 2021 FIRST......Read the rest...

...I once knew a lad who played the cornet Tooted ‘til he broke out in a cold sweat He met a strumpet Who liked his trumpet He is blowing his heart out for her yet June 3, 2021......Read the rest...

...She is such a pretty porker the old sow said. I thought you were too old for swine, said cousin Fred. I may be tough, but I am certainly not dead, She is a gorgeous gobbler, the old sow said. W......Read the rest...

...I adopt dainty etiquette when quenching thirst or dining to buzzfeed growling beast inside me tummy. The missus requests obedience raising both my little fingers in the air upon taking bevera......Read the rest...

...12/5/20 Better choose quick Just might lose if You don't do it Awesome or a nuisance It either was or wasn't in the blueprints Still a loner, or already shot by Cupid's Arrow, underneath......Read the rest...

...Horn Haiku. reporters tooted out by trump had been booted highly disputed Jim Horn How about hearing a Horn haiku?......Read the rest...

...Feint faint "Fake" no nor'easter If putsch comes to shove, aye ain't no doggone fraidy cat nor chicken little fearing coup d'état, yours truly simply risk averse, and more exact, he stays se......Read the rest...

...She drank all the water in the first five seas. She burped and tooted and started to wheeze. The pirate ships began to toss and turn. Driftwood came in by the hundreds to burn. She released it ......Read the rest...

...One of the theories I haven't quite grasped Is quantum physics, it has a tendency to leave me aghast Now I ain't stupid Oops sorry, I just tooted We all must let fly or have a traffic jam......Read the rest...

...A flying saucer landed In a farmer's fallow field. It had come from far away, Beyond Orion's starry shield. The aliens were mystified. They giggled and they squealed. The cows were in t......Read the rest...