Lonely elf not 5’4, horny toad toon
Hits on maties wives in pubs and saloons
a smidge taller than Manson
yet not quite as handsome
His gal pal elves nudge him to G-E-T -A -R-O-O-M!
As I walked along Old Rine Road
I walked on by a grumpy toad
Ribbit, ribbit he croaked to me
Please move along and leave me be
If you want to see a frog
There, he lay... beneath that log
Feed him a fly or a tasty gnat
Or feed him both to get him fat
Ribbit, ribbit... he croaked his song
Ribbit, ribbit... just move along
Walk on by- leave me, alone
As I rest upon, my comfy- stone
The Chicken in the Road
why did the chicken cross the road?
he wanted to eat that toad
he put his feet in the street
and a passing car nearly took off his beak
he thought I am a lucky rooster
that definitely was no morale booster
as he walked to the double yellow lines
he realized he was being watched by a bovine
the bovine asked watcha’ doing
if you aren’t careful, you will be in a pot stewing
the rooster said that’s it
even though I’m half way I am going to quit
with that he turned around
but it was too late and by a car was run down
Clad in mud, olive-brown, warts and slime,
Across the lawn, a slow, squat, toxic blight,
Dinner-plate menace, poisonous glands
The warty invader takes all our time,
Flesh-webbed feet in the dead of night—
Spreading fast over native lands.
Nothing stops them, not native nor hound,
We watch them, the curse,
All of the toads.
In thousands now on the ground,
Worse.
Ole warty toad,
on mossy road
where secrets bode
For man to learn,
and wisdom earn
from leafy fern
Where you hold court,
and make your sport
safe from retort
I must amuse,
'tis no such ruse
lest I refuse
A fool I've been,
frantic again
like Mother Hen
Too loud to hear,
now you are near
your secrets dear.
Winner first place: Any Living Thing, Charles Messina (Sponsor) 4/19/26
The Warty Toad swells
as I stomp by his hiding.
Zap! He eats a fly!
Winner 8th place: 1459 New Poem contest, Brian Strand (4/03/26)
jumpity rumpity toad in a pot
transmogrification often is sought
wiggly piggly nose pink and red
Halloween shenanigans often well fed
Whither now hunker-shins?
You have a sweet countenance,
a squat grace,
always middle-aged
on the still edge of a speeding sun.
Another swift day has begun
yet here you sit among the traffic
unflinching, a bold
bladder quelling gravity
with low-sprung shanks.
You deep-seated recliner,
standing-pat over upholstered hams.
A lumpy Mona Lisa,
with your come-hither girth
and just a thin membrane
between you and chaos.
Your skin an alien chiaroscuro,
a candle-lit atlas,
and in the cockle and crimp
of your glistening skin
a truculent contrarian gleams
beneath your world-dismissing
Buddha smile.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
redux
Finery Winery resides down Amble Bramble Road
they make vintage bubblies created by old Todd Toad
His ideas are unique, his packaging is more than fine
His tasting rates are posted, somewhere down the line
Wizards, warlocks and gremlins travel out to his place
Once I noted a visitor from elsewhere, possibly outer space
Old Todd Toad’s reputation is beyond this planet now
His drinks are unique; many say “a big fat wow!”
Within every warty frog or toad
that you encounter on the road,
a hidden prince sleeping, lies,
though his tongue just catches flies;
and if I can persuade you this,
I suggest you give me a kiss.
("Peyote Moon", 2018, original encaustic)
The Great Toad
At the gateless gate
I met the Great Toad
Sitting tall and wide
And in his gaze
All my needs were known
And met
And in that moment
I passed beyond
Without a trace
(8/17/25)
I want to be a horned toad
Puffing myself up to enormous fluffiness
terrifying my enemies
eating ant sandwiches as they run from me
squirting blood out of my eyes
confusing them even further
If you are in no hurry, you can ask the toad to swing by
He costs less money than an Uber or Lift said Uncle Cy.
I could not believe when I looked out and saw his steed.
A tomato caterpillar named Billy, just what I did not need.
I had to get to work today, tomorrow would not do.
I paid them the whole fare and gave them an excuse too.
The toad and tomato worm were excited by their money.
Uncle Cy said no worries, they get paid like that all the time, Honey.
there was a young toad named Joad
who began life as a mere tadpole
one day it is said
he ended up dead
the protein in a Blue Heron’s casserole
There once was a dumb toad named Blue
who went around eating white glue;
Horns grew from his head,
His body turned red,
He said, “I should have eaten stew.”
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