Short Once In A Dog Poems

I once had a dog. He was a handsome Dalmation,
but he disappeared after I accidently spilled spot remover on him....

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There once was a dog,

who started a blog,

he reported the news,

with barking reviews,

then toasted success with egg nog....

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once a sheep dog named percy

licked a farmer quite slurply

then a homeless cow

with mimicked bowwow

licked them both without mercy....

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i once saw a dog chasing ants

but only if they wore green pants

this dog felt antsy

around pants fancy

and so theyd break into a dance....

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there once was a dog named clyde
his owner did take him to ride
on arrival I swear
they sheared all of his hair
now all that he wants, is to hide...

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I once had a dog named Carter
Who was a hell of a farter
I stuck a plug up his butt
To stop the farting mutt
But Carter just pushed 'em out harder!...

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There once was a dog from Nantucket
He lived with my neighbor Jim Puckett
He’d bark all night long
From sunset til dawn
So I loaded my gun and I shot it...

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I once had a dog I named Alice.
I built her a house like a palace.
She was just the sweetest.
Not really elitist. 
But still drank her grog from a chalice....

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A Dog called Leo


I once knew a Dog called Leo
Who loved singing Sole Mio
Then one day out of choice
Gave up his soulful voice

Now barks at the Moon, poor Leo...

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I once had a dog
Who thought he was a frog,
He jumped in the pond
And croaked.
That's why these tears
From to many beers
Now he lies 'neath
The neighbors old Oak....

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King
By
Tom Wright

There once was a dog-named King,
Who when told to fetch would bring.
While on the highway fetching,
A truck caught him stretching
Now his shape resembles a spring.
...

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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
There once was a dog named Alfalfa.
Who stood in line to vote for the alpha.
Was nothing but fur and bones
Votes for dog with most Milkbones.
Bribed! He is pure-bred Americana!
...

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There once was a dog we called Harper,
Not nary a dog could be sharper,
She basks in the sun,
Until the days done, 
Then curls up on your lap once it’s darker.

Written with my daughters during our lunch break as we admired our sweet dog Harper!...

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There once was a dog by name of Tiger
She belonged to Kendricks who acquired her
Doris brushed her teeth each week
With Jr.'s  tooth brush so meek
When he learned, said, "Why?"..(She)I did not want mine dirtied sir..

In honor of Brian Strand.......

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es 1/29/11               



                     There once was a dog who ate candy

                      He must of thought it to be dandy

                         when he went for a walk

                             then started to talk

                    Now everyone thinks that is handy...

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THERE ONCE WAS A DOG
WHO SAT ON A LOG
HE LOVED TO PLAY IN THE GASS
SWIM IN THE OCEAN AND CATCH BIG BASS
WENT BACK TO THE LOG WITH THAT BIG BASS
STRETCHED OUT AND STARTED EATING THE BSS
AS HE LAID STRETCHED( AND FULL ) OUT ON THE GRASS
THERE WAS NOTHING BUT LEFT OVERS OF THAT BASS
SPREAD OUT ALL OVER THAT GRASS...

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I once had a dog
I made it live with my hog
He always stunk really bad
What happened to him was pretty sad
I got sick of the little fag!
The smell of him was making me gag
So i tied him to a pole
Hurting him was my number one rule!
I pulled out my gun
I thought heck, this'll be pretty fun
Then without hesitation i shot that punk
I was so traumatized i became a monk......

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A Dog Named Bear

There once was a dog named “Bear”
He liked to run here and there.
When he went for a walk,
To his mistress he talked.  And said,
 “Come!  Chase that frog over there."
“Bear! Back to my side,” Mistress cried.
Dogs that eat frogs often die!”
She walloped his hide.
He walked home by her side.
And spent the rest of the day by a chair.

© Dane Ann Smith-Johnsen
    December 23, 2009...

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There once was a dog
with love in his heart 
and trust in his eyes
who howled at the moon
who buried his bones
who chewed the cushions
who protected and guarded
without being asked
and without reward
who licked and wagged
and smiled and danced
who became
the best friend
you could ever have
he was the very first dog
Loyalty was his name
and every dog
that followed behind him
hasn’t changed 
a single thing.
 
...

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