Short First Mate Poems

~   hummer, far at sea -



                              wee wings, my steadfast comfort ...



               first mate ... of rare worth.   ~...

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Pirate penguin had a song in his oversized heart
It was singing and chiming in a new kind of art.
He investigated the plank and laughed with a lark.
Now we wait for a crocodile, he said to first mate McBark....

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To the skipper, first mate, and passengers of the Minnow,
there is this little something I think you should know:

Considering the world and the shape it is in today,
on that little island of yours, I think you should stay.
...

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A lobster trap must have caught something big
It plummeted into the depths of the Aurora Sea
Captain Fishman danced a glorious jig
Thinking he’ll caught a treasure for free

When they were pulling it up the rope almost broke
This must be a sea creature or monster maybe crewmate
Or a mermaid or merman said first mate McBloke
Mermaid wiggled and jiggled all the way out of that sea...

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The Umbrella

It was a rainy sort
Of afternoon, when I crossed
The bridge didn`t notice 
Half it was missing.
Held on to my brolly when I fell
Parachuted landed on a barge.
They needed a deckhand.

The sea was a black mirror, the cook
Was artistic and pissed we only had
Bacon butties that day
I gave the collapsible canopy to the first mate
It was green and covered
In seagull droppings...

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Stephanie did not know about sausage gravy
Until she decided to join the US Navy.
What is this delicious stuff? She asked her first mate.
Biscuits and gravy; ain’t it enormously great?

She wanted gravy on her eggs, gravy on her toast.
She loved sausage gravy so much, actually the most.
I want gravy in my coffee and gravy in my tea!
She was a six hundred pounder when she decided to marry Lee....

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And have you heard the story 
Of Captain Sean McGrew,
Who sailed the mighty oceans, 
In a square rigged wooden shoe?
                                                  
His first mate was a salty dog
From east of Lilla Bay.
The ship's crew hailed from Lilligo,
In Lilliput, they say.     

Then one sad day, he lost his ship,
His crew, and all his loot,  
To a roguish band of pirates, 
In a rapid sailing, chukka boot....

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I am, I guess, a tattered soul. 
A vagabond of sort. 
A derelict adrift at sea. 
No captain and no port. 

Nowhere to go, no one to guide.
This frail and haggard bark,
Aimlessly drifts out to sea, 
Piteously and stark. 

No pilot here the helm to take.
No first mate to assist.
Into oblivion adrift,
Into a dark abyss.

Will there one day a solace be?
Will nepenthe be won?
Can a sweet respite be found
Before my setting sun?...

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Pink gladiola fleet entered the Dutch canal at two o’three.
One of the pirates said “Whoopdee dee dee”
What’s on board? Asked a first mate named Prix.
Not sure, he said, but it might be pretty girls, for free.

His wife heard and decided to make an example of him.
She took him by the ears, and she shook him by his chin.
The women from the gladiola fleet cheered for his wife.
“Served you right!” Yelled one of them, enjoying his strife....

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You don’t have to be astute
To know the Red team won’t choose Newt.
There are reasons several-fold – 
First of all, he just seems old.

Though he may be very smart,
He’s dumb in matters of the heart.
Cheated on a loyal wife –
“Open marriage?” – Get a life!

Now he stands to make a speech
With number 3 wife, like a leech,
Always just an inch away,
With her hair held down by spray.

Newt, I hate to tell you, mistah,
Next first mate won’t be Callista!...

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When I met the Bard back in the day
he was only seventeen.
I introduced him to merriment
and showed him how to dream.

At twenty one I flew him
to where the dun cows roam. 
Where we sang the ancient songs
and cried the ancient groans.

The Bard was my companion
He captain, I first mate.
We spent each night together
with or without plate.

Although, forty years have go’n by.
We still sit blood shot, eye to eye.
He the man and I the rye....

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We are surrounded said the young whipping boy. There was terror in his voice.
“We are going to DIE!” he screamed.
The more mature crew members knew better.
They had been surrounded before, many times.
They kept their cool.
Just for fun the Captain shouted, “WE’RE GOING TO DIE!”
A first mate pushed the whipping boy into the water.
The crocodiles got him quickly.
This set the oldsters up for a laughing contest.
They began to advertise for their next whipping boy too....

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Written: by Tom Wright
February 2015

At day blink, a first mate scarcely notices,
That fume’s of time has begun to devour his day,
 He has a gentle wind in his sails and suddenly, 
Eventide has enveloped him, with calmness;

With undeviating stealth, at twelve bells, arrives tomorrow;
An open harbor that not all will be favored to sail into,
And those with entry pass will leave forever in their wake,
Things cast overboard that can ne’er be reclaimed or altered.
...

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