Short Egad Poems

There was an old woman from Brighton

Whose face the small children would frighten

     “Egad, why these wrinkles?

     My eyes lost their twinkles!”

Her skin she used clothespins to tighten








*April 11, 2018...

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Colonel Flighty is a cad
Thinks himself a funny wag
Thinks he's mighty, ain't that sad
"Look at me! A strutting stag!"

Jiggly belly, jowls that sag
Throat all phlegmy, such a drag
Trousers smelly, makes you gag
Leaky colostomy bag.

Toss him quickly drown a crag
If he lives we'll be so mad
End his sickly feeble brag
Hear his fading shout, "Egad!"...

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As your memory begins to slow 
You write little notes to yourself
Don’t forget to pick up the laundry
And thaw out a meal for tonight.

I know I wrote a reminder
On that little yellow note pad
I stuck it in a special place
And now it’s missing, oh egad!

So the laundry is still waiting
Tonight’s dinner is still freezing
I think depending on these notes
Needs some serious rethinking....

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A deed done good
Is done as it should
Bring help it could
To the brotherhood
The sisterhood
And the neighborhood.

A deed done bad
Makes all sad
It shouldn’t had
It’s positively mad
A passing fad
Begets, “Egad”

As the doer of the deed
These words please take heed
Of bad one’s there is no need
For good one’s we all plead
It’s your choice of course indeed
You have the power to pick the deed
I hope that you succeed...

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