Short Appliance Poems

Rusty appliance
sit smile sleep slighted succumb
dead end offspring
foreign cultures revere us
disposable waste...

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Single girl anxiety,
I tend to go a bit crazy; 
Appliance could break, 
busted roof I shake;
Wear hard heels it’s fun to be me....

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Nigella Lawson
Her food my source of inspiration
Cooking up a storm of exotic tastes
A master chef on the hot plates


09-13-2015...

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I have seemingly now been blown to bits
and I've clearly taken a lot of hits.
I'm still holding my own;
I won't fuss, I won't moan
but I am not an appliance that quits!...

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Trump Can Never Use

Trump can never use,
Any household appliance;
Turn off a faucet.

Trump has people taking care
of everything for him. 

Butter piece of toast;
Put bread into a toaster,
Or scrape off dark part.

Jim Horn...

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I can count on my fingers
  the number of college men --
who can hammer a nail true
  and make a screwdriver screw

who can saw along a straight line
  and finish a DIY project on time --
And if an appliance chance to break down
  rather then them, I'd hire a clown...

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A mysterious corner of the home
    where human critters never roam
  perhaps behind a major appliance
    wherever forms an 'I-won't-go-there-alliance'

  Fall and Winter, sticky gunk sneaks in there
    posing a challenge, daring a dare
  Dark crevices emit strange odors and squeaks
    ~ I'll wait 'til Spring to take a peek...

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Commercials
By: Tom
3’24’2020

What you see
Isn’t always what you get.
Appliance or Mattress, or Mobile Device
First, cheapen it up,
go heavy on the advertising.
Then, more importantly,
give it some fancy name. 
After inflating the price,
have a 30-40-even 50 percent off sale,
Works every time!
Baa Baa Baa
...

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Stove is a device used for heating or
cooking food.
There are wood, coal, electric and
gas stoves.
Oven is a part of the stove used for
baking cakes and other recipes.

Stofa is an old english word used
in the antiquity.
The first stoves were used in Rome.
Modern stoves has a glass top.

Stoves come in many sizes and colors.
An appliance that has been very beneficial
to modern kitchens....

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I really love the dishwasher
And so does Mum and Dad!
We filled it after every meal,
Until one day I heard a squeal!
Water had poured all over the floor
But hadn’t made it under the door!
Until the appliance was in the pink
Dishes were washed in the sink.
That really was not much fun,
It’s fair to say it was none!
Dishwashers can break in a blink
But it’s so much better than using the sink!...

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Kettle or dishwasher
Battle for greatest 
Tool used in the kitchen

How should we compare?
It is, of course, no doubt
Quite stiff competition

For each has its worth
And I’m not saying
Any different

But tea has something 
Special. Hot and
Ready in an instant

Dishwasher, sure it’s
Hot enough but I’m
Not drinking of its liquid

If there were a prize 
For best appliance
Kettle surely gets it...

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Sex is a science
You can use an appliance
Don't be shy at all

Tickle her fancy
By telling your fantasy
Make it sound a ball

Don't try to diet
If it's freaky just try it
Taste it with your tongue

Make it fast or slow
Keep it simple for god knows
When beast lose control

The gift of pleasure
To which there is no measure
That majestic flow

Bought sold tried or trend
All good things must come to end
Again, just say when...

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