Thank ye all fer coming te this feast
Many a fine lady accompanied by there beast
Enjoy your broth as a wee starter
Were joined together for friendship n banter
Followed by the ode to the haggis
Gentlemen give ya lasses a kiss
Neaps and tatties served with the meat
Veterans and serving here to meet
The pudding is Eton mess
All the lasses are wearing a dress
Athollbross is a drink of the dirt
Even the men can wear a skirt
I dinna Ken what burns is about
But I know that Scots scream n shout
I Ken the man was a jock poet
But how is haggis meant to be ate
A three legged monster running around the Glen
How it manages I dinne Ken
But once ye have caught this wee beast
I guarantee ya in for a feast
Thank you all for joining in
The piper lasse was amazing
Enjoy the music and the crack
Hopefully next year we'll be back
Have pity on the Scott’s ruled
By the Brexit voting sassenach
Who don’t seem to understand
We too want out country back.
Arbroath Smokies for breakfast
Porridge seasoned with salt
Kedgeree, Haggis, neaps and tastes
With wee drams of single Malt.
Pints of Heavy Friday nights
The working weeks end
Words of wisdom swapped
With true and blethered friend.
Fish and taties frae the chippie,
Deep fried Mars Bar to follow
Just to round off the night
A sweet delight to swallow.
Then the planning to drive
The Sassenachs from our soil,
Take back all our fish and
What’s left of North Sea oil.
Home Rule For Scotland
Restore our law and Order
Keep those thieving Brits
To their side of the border.
We'll gladly offer asylum
To those few of sound mind
Who want to up sticks and leave
Those heathen Tories far behind.
Let them keep their wee King
They’re always asking God to save
We’ll have the massed pipe bands
Loudly playing Scotland the Brave
Goodbye United Kingdom
Land of thieving Tory
Living on faded memories
Of Passed hope and glory.
Scotland the Brave
Scotland the free
Goodbye puny England
We’re all so well shot of thee
Recollections were a little hazy,
His leaving party last night,
Undying friendships sworn,
That last friendly little fight.
Goodbye, Scotland the Brave,
Home of the warrior Clan,
The Batter Fried Mars Bar,
The Rangers footie fan,
Cool pints of Heavy
Plates of ‘taties and neaps,
Lining for the stomach
After boozy long sleeps.
He wore a Black Watch Kilt
Hung modestly to his knees
With a hem of fishing weights
To stop it lifting in the breeze.
A sheathed Skean Dhu projected
From the top of one long sock
As he stood there, a solitary figure,
On the banks of his local loch.
A supply of Haggis sandwiches
Were wrapped in a large pack
Carefully stored for his rations
In the Bergen on his back.
Goodbye porridge mines of Pentland,
Casual beating for the Haggis hunt,
Time to think of his own future,
Best foot forward, Eyes to the Front.
One last wistful look around him
Then, carefully adjusting his load
He took that first step from Scotland
Along that long High Road,
To the Land of the Sassenach.
He was a Scot through and through
But in such troubled times as these
A man’s got to do what he has to do.
New Years Eve it’s party time
Sup the beer and drink the wine
Special meal with new made friends
Comedian, sometimes offends.
Food and dancing all the way
To give old year it’s last hooray
Music singing from the show
Songs and jokes and laughter flow
Countdown starts with 10 to go
Poppers an balloons to throw
At last the final seconds boom
Bells and chimes to fill the room
Hugs and kisses, Chinks and cheers
Shaking hands, smiles and tears
Special thoughts for old friends passed
Resolutions never last.
Confetti, streamers piled in heaps
Stay up late, eat Tats and Neaps
Champagne flows, fizz and bubbles
Drink too much- have some troubles.
In the morning a different story
Headache-nausea feeling poorly
Take some pills and close your eyes
Promises to be more wise
Last day today with sad farewell
Next Year to meet again we tell
Drive Safe –good trip to all we wish
Memories that last just bliss.
castle built of salt and sand
endless dreams and hopes that span
build it tall
away from the wall
of the tide when it neaps in
lovers walk, on this thin strand
where the moatless castle stands
no longer perfect like it began
the wind and tide has done it in
a sky of blue
a sea of green
this sandy beach
on which I dream
the tide ebbs
and then it neaps
under starlit skies
my promises keep
cast them out
upon the waves
and what comes back
will always remain
those that float
away from me
were not the ones
for me to keep
Sipping slowly
Fast broken
Reading into
Words unspoken
Sailing into neaps and swollen
Tides of ethereal friendship
Kindled kindred souls
sailing unseen waters
Blithely sharing
miles apart
Viewpoints of
heart
As daydreams
of wet canvas
stroke cheeks
of Mersey fog
in salty
dirty brown