I need someone who thinks
I’m worth a misadventure;
Worth the risk,
worth a skinny dip at midnight;
Worth the work,
worth trying
when you never have before;
I need someone who thinks
I’m worth a misadventure;
Worth the risk,
worth ignoring the shallow end;
Worth a deep dive,
worth drowning
knowing you’ll be able to breathe;
I need someone who thinks
I’m worth a misadventure;
Worth the risk,
worth double or nothing;
Worth a gamble,
worth the jackpot;
I am your seven, seven, seven;
I need someone who thinks
I’m worth the risk;
Worth a misadventure,
worth being real;
Worth changing your game
worth baring your soul,
because that is the shine in my eyes.
summing up:
all the evidence was there
how we fell through each other's arms
now, a failed extrovert
looking for pieces dropped along the way
heading
for the afterlife
with nothing in my pockets
Folded as neatly as any origami piece
I fashioned my saber-jet flight ready
And aimed it at my third-grade squeeze
When the teacher said, “Milton, please!”
Unfortunately, missing my target, darn,
It zig-zagged far to the left, then steady
Flew right into the window aquarium
When the teacher said, “Milton, please!”
Retrieving my water-saturated missile
Which was dripping fuel onto the floor
I was petrified by my apparent disgrace
When the teacher said, “Milton, please!”
Creeping back to my seat in disgrace
While expecting, as a result, the worst
In my effort my sweetheart to appease
When the teacher said, “Milton, please!”
Written August 14, 2022
[based on a true experience]
Submitted to "Paper Airplanes" Poetry Contest
Sponsored by John Lawless
I sing this song of high misadventure
The tale of a lonesome cattle rancher
Who set out on a grandiose venture,
And promptly lost his upper denture.
He struggled mightily with a T-bone steak
Pork and beans he could always make,
Except when his can opener he couldn't find
He was hard-pressed to change his mind
Of all the things he'd thought he'd need,
He was happiest he’d brought along his weed
So, in abandoned relief, he lit up a joint,
And, suddenly, it changed his whole viewpoint
Said he, “With what I have I will make do,
Lots of things you don’t have to chew.”
written January 21, 2022
There once was a sailor from Saskatoon
Who recklessly wielded his new harpoon
He impaled himself
Accusing an elf
Crew replaced him by a smarter baboon
AP: Honorable Mention 2022
Submitted on August 11, 2019 for contest A LIMERICK, OLD OR NEW: YOUR PERSONAL FAVORITE sponsored by ANDREA DIETRICH - RANKED 6TH
The black slurry sound of coal lifted by a shovel
As it enters the locomotive mouth of fire
Consumed in flames as well on dark gray days
Is advised and necessary for movement forward
In any event the heat and cold are secondary
To other pressing matters of formal conversation
Not worth mentioning as life goes off the rails
Carriages slip into oblivion when leaving the tracks behind
With snow no longer pushed aside, blindly from side to side
No longer facing horizontally as trains are known to go
Coaches fall and with them people's laughter
Vertical movement seems peculiar at times like these
Locomotion in the snow in total free fall seems obscene
Passengers did not sign up for going off the bridge
Surely a refund is in order when disappointed
Ending in ravines was not foreseen
Not exactly the adventure anticipated for this ride
Certainly not the destination they surmised
We are sure the engineer will have an explanation
If he and others should survive
You had much to venture
and hopes of gain
now close your eyes
and cradle the pain
choking on the waves
sliding down your throat
you’re left to wander
afloat.
Too much ventured
so little gained
go haul your body over a cliff;
land with feet touching first
gather the pieces left in tact
carry them back to the abyss.
Look at the place you first came to fall
aim for the be and end all,
before you make this final venture
remember,
you are not coming back again.
Felines have a versatile paw
That unfolds a razor like claw
An apron has strings
That cats see as playthings
While scratching chef's butt 'til it's raw
Author's Note: This story was related to me by an attractive and shapely associate who claims she sometimes works in her kitchen dressed only in her bra and an apron.
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