Minister Poems | Examples

'Crime Minister' Someday

     Young Todd pinched his bankers’ certificate
     Forged two more, so he had a triplicate

         Now Todd would fulfill his dream
         ‘Good old boys’ downplayed his scheme  

     ~ On the fast track to run the syndicate

Limericks Written In A Country Churchyard

There once was a sensitive vicar,
who said, "I'm not one to bicker,
but the peal of that bell,
makes me feel quite unwell,
and plays merry hell with my ticker."

An incensed old soul by the spire,
preaching incense-igniting to the choir,
exclaimed, "There is but one catch,
when striking a match,
don't set your surplice on fire."

A parson spoke from the nave,
"Spend all you can, do not save,
if you've spilled all the sands,
and still have time on your hands,
you can't take it with you to the grave."

A wise minister in the kirk,
enlightened, observed with a smirk,
"When it's dark out there,
put your hands in the air,
as many hands make light work.”

The Mother of Parliament-- REALLY

I just watched Prime Ministers question time,
What a noise like monkeys trying to mime.

The speaker sits up in her chair,
Both sides shout the row filling the air.

This is the place from which our country is run,
To say it's run is really just a great big pun.

The MP's are there just for personal glory,
They don't really care as long as they continue their families story.

Some just sit and take the money,
Other try for the bigger jobs, like bees around the honey.

Their lives all mapped out to get a companies directorship,
Whilst making sure their cronies are in and likely to get a substantial tip.

They are blind to what the real people need,
They look down their noses, they think they are a superior breed.

There is supposed to be separate parties with original idea's,
But none of them do and they can wreck the country, that's my fear.

Some say don't worry, things will change when we have the next election,
But it won't be any different, because we will still only have that limited selection.

Minister of the Street

   He ministers to his congregation
      the lame, the numb and the broken
   On random street corners they gather
      To watch him perform, they’d rather – 

   Than rattle their cup for a quarter
      or beg for a measly thin dime
   ‘Cos when he growls at a suit and scares him
      they all howl ~ forget their troubles for a time

The New Minister is Weird

Bet she knows she is odd the church crone says.
I am confused “Who?”
The new minister.
I look around, still have no clue where or who she is.
“Lady in blue polka dotted shirt,” the crone hisses.
I finally spot her, sitting behind a potted plant.
“She is the new minister?”
Head nod, the crone’s eyes are more snake-like than I remembered
“She is weird. Look at those shoes!”
The newcomer would have fit in well in any city of the world.
A bit too sophisticated for this town of two thousand and sixty-one in Nebraska.
I walk toward her, determined to give her a warm welcome.
“I think I wore the wrong shoes,” she said.
I smile, liking her immediately.

PRAISE BE TO GOD WHO ENABLES US TO MINISTER

January 27 Praises to God Bible Meditations Based on Exodus 28-30

Key Verse – Exodus 28:35 And it shall be upon Aaron to minister: and his sound shall be heard when he goeth in unto the holy place before the LORD…

PRAISE BE TO GOD WHO ENABLES US TO MINISTER	

Praise be to God for enabling us to minister by His:
Spirit of consecration
Strength of compassion
Sanctification of cleansing
Sufficiency of grace
Scriptures of wisdom

Exodus 29:18 Praise be to the Lord for inviting us 
to give Him an offering of: 
Sweet savour
Surrendered sacrifice
Satisfying service 
Sincere stewardship
Steadfast supplication
Serene suffering
Spiritual success 
 
Exodus 30:37 Praise be to the Saviour for expressing
to us clearly that our offering must be holy with: 
Christ-like testimony for His glory
Cleansed thoughts by His grace 
Consecrated treasures through His generosity.  Amen!

January 27, 2024

Sinister Minister

Here lie the remains of a minister
To the ladies he did administer
His charms never lacking,
He was seldom slacking
But his motives seemed somehow sinister.

Written November 18, 2022

A Prime Minister Everyone Hates

Let the people vote for our leader 
show Liz Truss we do not need her 
a position of power growing weaker 
can you dream if you’re not a believer 

What if the people have lost confidence 
and don’t want the Tories dictating events 
we don’t want leaders who lack any sense 
everyone now has to watch every pence 

Tax breaks for the wealthy who wouldn’t notice more 
that makes you self serving with not a care for the poor 
serving more instability making us insecure 
out of touch with a public who want to show you the door

It’s the Bank of England against political fakes  
taking power for granted not realising the stakes 
since the first day in power you’ve been making mistakes 
we’ve got a Prime Minister that everyone of us hates 

Killing dreams 
Killing Queens 
mad as it seems 
Get out we screams

The Minister Ran Out Screaming

The church ladies had a head committee that met at tables.
They started out at houses – Lee’s, Annabelle and Mable’s.
But eventually they returned to the church to snip and chat.
The young minister ran past them as they chewed the fat.

They liked to over plan, to negotiate, to argue and fuss.
They could easily get into a confrontation with no muss.
They wore casual clothes, but dresses, of course.
Sometimes the young one, Naomi, rode in on her horse.

The basement of the church is where they would convene.
In other rooms, these stalwart planners were rarely seen.
They were a tight group, and they discussed the rest.
They were the gossip gals, and truly some of the best.

Long after these ladies had gone to the pearly gates
The chairs they once used fell out of their crates.
Forming a circle in their meeting room, no kind of dreaming.
The elderly minister was spooked, ran out screaming.

Minister and the Sinister

I cannot find The Excellent 
In what is Largely Repellent:
If one swam a cold river, 
One was liable to shiver…

I won`t heed Lord`s Minister, 
Who dwells on The Sinister:
Often about Mortuary 
Rather than Clean Sanctuary: 
Neglected Nude Sinner`s Corpse 
Which on trodden bare floor drops!

Your Priests who watch White Clerics 
Have never heard them drop clicks,
During Sermon try a scowl 
Or before its end dog`s growl;
Your Evangelical Schools
Have been breaking The Rules

Forget the crowd they do pull
Church to capacity full:
Time they threw in the towel;
Some can do well trowel…

Sinister Minister With a Blister

Sinister Sinner Who Became a Minister

wore big blister
was sinister minister
became senator

a legal tender
minister an offender
had been big spender

minister spinster
with a good looking sister
hard to resist her

had been beginner
then he cooked a great dinner
now a real winner

sailed with spinnaker
when a big wind did occur
hard to endure

Fragments of 1972

Fragments of 1972
David J Walker

I carry the year 1972 
in a leather messengers bag
That sags and strains the strap from my 
shoulder to my hip 
and I claim
to open it only 
once a year at midnight 
but that is a malleable lie
that has 
morphed as I have aged  
Have you ever raged at a minor 
		Injustice
Do you trust your minister to dispense 
		Only the holy truth
Are you glad that you are not
		A traffic cop
		Directing traffic
Do you believe you can solve the world’s problems
		By inviting everyone
		One at a time 
		To be your neighbor
Do you ever see yourself as the antithesis 
		Of a solution
		To a problem that
		You were the only one 
Who didn’t know
My calendar is a fragmented rag and has lost
		The first week of 
		January
		including next Wednesday
When I go back there I feel 
		Overdressed and
		Out of place

Why are You - You

Ask me a probing question - Why are you - you?
I write these words and lines to guide you through
the who, what, and how of my world view.

Offering my most genial reply,
the abc's here prove to specify
why, made in God's image, his path I ply.

Announcing Bold  Convictions, I do
Declare Essential Faith unto you.
Gladly Herald, Introducing folks to

Jesus - King - Lord, His most precious name.
Maligned?  Nullify,  Openly Proclaim;
Questioned?  Reasonably Speak Truth without shame.

Uttering Vocal Worship Xenial-ly, as
Yahweh’s Zephyr I speak with pizzazz.

*xenially is the Greek form of the English word, genially.
the form is my own, a reasonnet, 14 lines, monorhymed by stanza, w/o meter.

Minister of Strangest Thrills

Poor Q. Pine tucks away all his quills
The ones that give perverts such strange thrills  
   Lovingly caresses them
   Religiously blesses them
Now he's off to see Beverly's Hills

A Minister - O So Prime

Now watch this man. He’ll take a chance!
Will he lead us a merry dance?

His goal, power. His play, quick words.
A minister and o so prime.
But watch out for he may ponder
And change his tack time after time.
Those thorny shoots he does not see.
No quick words come. Not even rhyme.

Now, watch this man. He’ll take a chance!
Will he lead us a merry dance?

He is captain at number ten.
And all ship-shape he runs the show.
He has a team of free wise men,
Who will argue which way to go,
By maybe re-writing the rules.
Hush-hush! The public must not know. 

Now, watch this man. He’ll take a chance!
Will he lead us a merry dance?

With him confident at the helm
Britain sets sail to cross a sea,   
Where stormy waters soon gather.
Our captain sails to set us free
From regulations of years past, 
To now escape the EEC.

We watched this man. He took the chance.
Should we rejoice? Should we now dance?

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