Long The one who Poems
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HOSTAGE OF ONE NIGHT
what is his name she asks
but i refuse to tax my mind
though the memory of him
hovers, the one who stole
my virginity, caused my shame
what is his name she asks
for in the beginning i did not tell
sheltered in my deepest mind
divulged when a loved one died
what is his name, will it pop up tonight
in my dreams...i’ve long ago closed the door
but now this monstrous thing hovers
closing in once more...i almost see him
and his sister too and the darkest night
wants to preside in the daylight
through fog and wandering nerves
i still remember clearly...where,
when, what, why. there’s no goodbye
clothing ruthlessly thrown on stairs,
stained, a yellow bodice unsnapped
the scintilla of a window open
my eyes close out the “no” i screamed
in the end i remember
and can’t forget
afterall
9/29/2018
I am the way that I am but it does not define me
I am a child an adolescent released from captivity
I am the brick to a wall
I am the sail on a sail big and tall
I am here this time to tell it all
I am better than I use to be
I am free
I am the anti that put bullying to shame
I am the corner who hears badgering some one's name
I am dedicated to stand when I want to fall
I am who I am I except the call
I am to speak loud and clear
I am the drum beating in the ear
I am the canal of surf and wind
I am have found a heart to mend
I am the needle with thread
I am to stitch a circle put shame to bed
I am that I am and here I am
I am the one who stands
I am the one who never was denied
i am have been talked about and lied
i am the one who was wearing a mask to
i am here to tell the truth
I am help at this time if need
I am sits here and I am is free
Bullying someone interesting seems to appear,
But there's nevertheless any case to clear,
Longing some captivity causing a glare,
Maybe your writing is a way to preserve that stare.
Some words are a bit unclear,
I think it was building an atomic nuclear,
Forsaking deepening affection lasts a year,
Hoping to see that resting near.
Grafting two lines in a single plate,
Are they just used to being a slate,
Bearing a visual pain depicting a few slots,
Imagining a long-lasting life at cost.
Dealing with my hardship during the depressing years,
Yearning for a mere lonely sphere,
It feels like I'm guessing that I wear it,
A bit of a moment of stiffness to inherit.
Leftovers turn fractures into some brittle pieces,
Frosting in deep ice is never entering a crisis,
Some vague words are going to be anchored,
I think drowning hardness has never been fissured.
The weather keeps turning phases at different steps ahead,
I'm thinking of a chrysalis that has been matured,
I know the bedrock is breaking while trembleness resists,
Now covering all braces with being them persist.
Monolithic life's veneer is now a thickener,
Gutting some plant points is just a reminder,
New lime has been growing from that gutting,
The plant is now the one who is there standing fruiting
Measuring the amount of residual masses,
For the heart of grown matching grasses,
Knowing they fought with each other,
To cover the whole plot basis.
But my brittle bones are getting better to calcify,
Maybe it's better to accept rather than deny,
Loneliness is another word for long time confinement,
I know the whole life spent on the way of adjustment.
All claims here are resisted for future hope,
Beginning a new life with brighter lasting scopes,
Confinement is an ending with a tiny blush,
I'm still staring at past by a shining rush.
Since my mind started taking me on this journey going back to my past
I have worried non stop about how my heart would fall and how fast
I was right to worry and trying to keep myself all together well now sometimes that's task
But I did try to fight everyday
What to you I needed to say
But there became a time
Where those feelings I was painfully keeping inside
I knew from you I could no longer hide
They needed to be said
I just couldn't keep going like I was I couldn't breathe and the moment had come when I
couldn't any longer pretend
So I told you how I had always been with and still in love with you
You grew silent and speechless then didn't quite know what to do
I never meant to cause you any kind of sorrow
And when I look around you're not here with me today and I know you will not be here
tomorrow
I didn't want to make any trouble for you or be the reason for any heartache or pain
But I selfishly needed to so much stop my personal hell and rain
I still believe whole heartedly in everything I told to you
Even if now I am the one who don't quite know completely what to do
Some tell me to give up and just go ahead and give in
They tell me this maybe a game you're not meant to win
If that could be done easily what makes people think I wouldn't have already done it
Yet here in this room alone I still continue to sit
And even though sometimes I won't admit it, my heart's breaking off piece by piece and bit
by bit
They just don't get that on this for me giving up would just tear me more apart
Because you are the one who still after all these years has my heart
God must have a plan for me
Because dealing with all this I've come to clearly see
Just how much of a person I've grown
I know I can make it and I now am no longer afraid to stand on my own
But I understand and yes I know
That in this journey within myself I still have quite a long way to go
At times I still feel so week and that I haven't came very far
And I find myself wishing on each and every single star
Why do I at times feel so crazy and like I don't belong?
I feel like you and I were meant to be so strong
And if in feeling this I'm entirely wrong
Then to me it doesn't make any kind of sense
As to why I feel all this and more so intense...
...you and I will always be together in spirit from the day we met and until eternity
"Angel Through the Wires"
Are you an Angel?
Speaking
through my words?
You stand by me always,
as I walk roughshod
through this world.
I see your reflection
in my eyes
Mirror Silent
Revolution Image,
but you are not here,
You are in my dreams,
a cameo appearance
every now and again,
a beautiful surprise,
you say,
"Always speak The TRUTH, never tell lies".
You say,
"Hold my HEART
in yours.
Here is the real fire -
ETERNAL DOOR -
GOLDEN CHORD,
it stretches never broken,
always
TRUST
my word,
BELIEVE
it is always there to hold,
although unspoken".
You are singing
me HOME,
I answer your call
returning
to your peaceful
golden world, your
Tender Mooring shores.
Angel
road map on your skin,
you showed me
when I was a mere child
Your mirrors wet with tears,
you were frightened to let go -
You looked right through my windows,
8 years of my soul.
You said,
"Lay with me, for a little while
listen to me breathe",
you whispered in the dark,
so soft and gently.
Safe from blood suckers
under gauze net,
smell of Tiger Oil
and Frangipani,
in the Summer
of our impending loss and
your heart wrenching regret.
You and I,
we went for a little sleep
for a little while,
you fell first,
while I listened
to you breathe and
my eyelids dropped
with childish fears,
we both lay together
dreaming
dreams so still
We went to sleep
for but a little while
I met you in my dreams.
You delivered to me
all your stories
all throughout the little while
all throughout the years.
(Lovejoy-Burton/2 March 2018)
for K. & M. with ALL my LOVE.
for G. with ALL my LOVE.
for my mother with ALL my LOVE.
for my father with ALL my LOVE.
Easter 2018
John 15:12-13
(STORY: John 15 (NIV) "The Vine and the Branches")
for the One who died on the cross for ALL of us,
with ALL my LOVE.
There is a quiet
that comes from each dew
falling gently,
in rhythms who ensue
trembling echoes
feelings brand new
inspirations, in flavors
sweet joy to pursue
There is a sweetness
In every prayer, all grace
Pouring from the Father
Who offers love’s embrace
Revealing the wonder
In a wonderful life can’t erase
Wonderful that tells me
His love we can’t replace
There is serenity
In the moments of praise
Notes of still’s wisdom
Scriptures surely amaze
Pouring out hope
Into the spirit, on Sundays
When we seek Him
This light of forever and always
There is One
Who my heart knows
He is the answer
To a love that grows
He strengthens
His love surely flows
Righting each moment
As the wind softly blows
There is one God
One who is the light
He is the answer
The One who makes things right
He is the beautiful
In each heart’s fight
He is the miracle, the One
Who stills the darkest night
There is only One word
To tell the heart and soul
What it means to believe
What it means to be made whole
There is only One word
And that word is grace
Never stop coming to Jesus
Who will always amaze
I love the Father
I love the Son
When I get to heaven
I hope to hear well done!
I haven't crumbled, I haven't cried, I shed a few silent tears, but now my eyes have dried, I lost my maker, I lost my biggest fan, I lost the one who made this little boy into a man, I read a lot of philosophy, made plenty of my own too, but today I realised what letting go means, when it's forced unto you, my apologies to all I hurt, my apologies to her too, I could have been a bit better in behaving with you, I thank you dear people for being there in my time of need, I say good bye to my tree of life who has gone back into her seed. I hope you can hear me wherever you are hid, I love you, will always do and most truly always did..
Form:
The Nap
by Odin Roark
Through a smudged barroom window
A child stares in at the old man
In his darkened corner spot
He sits on a rickety chair
Head bent downward
Bleary eyes fixed on a weathered tabletop
His finger idly caressing a carved heart
Once etched with proclaimed love
Now void of excitement
Like the empty bar
Pondering fate
Soured with age
Years of youth
Never fulfilled
Haunts his every moment left
Why?
The child tilts her head
Matching the slumped old man
She too wonders
Why?
She can't see
The buried liar in him
The one called Discretion
The one who betrayed his trust
The voice so persuasive
Tomorrow will do
You've plenty of time
Your whole life's ahead of you
Arthritic fingers rise to his cheek
Sunken wrinkles like crevasses he once scaled
Now but remind him
How cold life can be
The little girl palms her sweater
Making clearer the window
She taps small fingers his way
Ancient eyes rise from tabled history
She smiles
He nods
A moment's joy
Stymies his reverie
His crooked fingers
Touch his lips
Remembering kisses
Never thrown
Till now
Thoughts and memories
Render him dizzy
He rests his head on the table
Time for his nap
In the once noisy bar
Of his youth
Pray…
Pray for those things
That God can bless
Joy and peace, wisdom
Love that gives out
Kindness and strength
Pray for good things
Which God brings to each
Of the children He feeds
With His truth, His spirit
Ponder…
Ponder those things
That God approves of
Faith, hope and love
Lights sent from above
Singing grace to the world
Reflecting promises
Belief that guides the soul
To the wonder of His love
The miracle of His beauty
Praise…
Praise for those things
That God Himself brings
Things like knowledge, insight
Inspiration and imagination
Creativity that colors hearts
In beautiful joy, gentleness
A spirit of honesty, sincerity
Serenity that stirs the spirit
To believe in His tender gifts
Pour out…
Pour out light across life
Light that God inspires inside
Light of hope, light of love
Light of faith, light of grace
Light of mercy, light of peace
Light that listens
Light that believes
Rain joy, kindness, thanks
To recognize and honor
The One who gave each one life
Listen to the heart, Listen and believe…
He is the answer to every hope or need
He is the blessing, the miracle, the wonder
He is God and His grace abides on those
Who know He is alive, living on the inside!
His light never dims
It never fades into the shadows
It never weakens from service
It never wanes with darkness
His light is enduring, unwavering
It abides inside the spirit
Fills the heart with gentle compassion
Breathes satisfaction into the one
Who knows His light reflects the Son
The light of God is music to the soul
The light of God is forever warm
The light of God is a pure, sweet love
His love never fails
It never wilts away with time
It never withers from fears or tears
It never recedes with the passage of years
His love is forever, eternal, endless
It lives in the soul who knows His passion
Satisfies the heart and soul who know Him
The One who brings new life to the spirit
The giver of hope, faith and love
The giver of treasures like the Son
The giver of all that hearts could want
His light shines into the darkness
Making a way for heart to realize grace
That comes from the One who saves
His love sparkles through the heart
Creating a kind spirit within the one
Who knows that His love is the assurance
That God will live forever, on and on
An eternal light, an eternal love, an eternal Son
Who brings each one a new birth, a new hope
A new way to live and believe and give
From the spirit who has been touched by His
Light, His love.. His peace from up above
Listen to your heart and believe
He is the answer to every need!