Long Speedo Poems

It’s heading for our planet at ten thousand miles an hour
To stop it all the experts say we haven’t got the power
All the nukes in all the world won’t constitute a plan
So someone said, ‘All...

Read More

When I first saw it
	in the dark corner there
where none would see it
	hidden away from sight

dark green was its color
	in the darkness hard to see
with few bright glitters
	catching the light

smooth flowing curves it had
	without harsh...

Read More

As cars go... 
This was a good one 
Gleaming black 
A perfect car... 
for Cadillac Jack 

What's in a name? 
People have names for cars 
Pet names 
It's all in that peculiar car game 

Cadillac...

Read More

There is a state of mind known as woebegone
In which one feels like an addict on methadone
The more one tries to feel upbeat
The more one suffers mental defeat
And the mind plays on like a gramophone.
8
The...

Read More

Used to be the weather was frightful
People covered themselves from head to toe
Now, despite the fact it’s Christmas season
I see more sand, than I see snow
The temperatures keep on elevating
To the moon, they just seem...

Read More

You may think that I am famous
Can't recall my name but
You've seen me hang out with the stars

Believe me I'm right there with ya
I'm in their every picture
They don't know me but I know who...

Read More

Dear Mother’s new flamboyant beau
Suggested I should take a job,
Instead I hopped aboard our Lear
And winged my way to St. Tropez
To mope, quiescent, on hot sand,
Ambivalent for Mother, dear,
Until a moment, most arcane,
Renewed in me...

Read More

Sure feel the cold a whole lot more
Since losing a bunch of pounds
Never considered there'd be side effects
And there's surely others I've found

Actually need a whole new wardrobe
Costly to lose so much weight
One good thing...

Read More

Highway Speed Cops
Have speedy tops!:
Motorists they halt
And check every fault
Mostly: 'Are ya alert
"Fatalities to avert?"

To mind speedo metre
Accidents to deter
Cops raise their Trap
Errant to surely slap!

"Ya can't badly drive
"An' wish to survive!"
Watchful by the road
They'll...

Read More

What am I?
Who am I?
I am the hooded warrior.
I strike with such charisma,
I am the inhibition taking enigma.

Who am I?
What am I?
I'm also called the dark knight.
Unknowingly, I approach surprisingly.
Cloak and dagger warrior,
can you see...

Read More

Sitting behind the sign on highway one
Waiting for hoons the whole day long 
The cruiser was primed and ready to go
To catch the malefactors in their tale of woo

In those days you had to hunt...

Read More

Keep the linens, the wool blends, and tweeds,
no need for silk or pressed poplin shirts.
Give me coolmax or one hundred per cent cotton 
Suit me up in a Speedo for laps in the pool. 
Dress...

Read More