Long Regimen Poems

Year 2031 would soon come
To a close. Everyone will be
A little wiser. 
Damian Junior wanted a 
Girlfriend and he was soon to
Be 13. Amadeus and
Desharah will both turn 10.
The oldest kids had a desire to
Add...

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Harriet Harris, née Kuritsky gave up the ghost...

~ May fourth, 2005
wedded bliss nearly fifty years
half a century almost
me not most favorite grown offspring,
she (when alive) did boast,
about youngest sister and her family,
unlike me – severely...

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FICTIONAL BIO:

The missus asked me
(hitherto known as her bozo)
just mere moments ago
to craft humorous poem to glow
nsync with the shiny nose of Rudolph
keeping syncopated metrical flow
thus methought to crow
about being equally as foolish
streaking naked outside...

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Ace colonoscopy doctor Kellen Karl Kovalovich

revisited January 23rd, 2024
on the evening before yours truly
(the one and only Matthew Scott Harris),
a stand up comic wannabe, who
historically heartily hales 
from Schwenksville, Pennsylvania
undergoes oh joy rapture colonoscopy.

Three days...

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Harriet Harris, née Kuritsky gave up the ghost ~ May 4th, 2004

Often these days
(closing in on the eighth
anniversary of eighth orbit
around mister sun),
the following genuine sentiment
Matthew Scott Harris
doth wish to share 
how one and only...

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Ace colonoscopy doctors Kellen Karl Kovalovich
and Larry Borowsky

Though necessary to down: 
four Dulcolax laxative tablets, 
quaff half 238 gram bottle of Miralax 
over span of eight hours, 
and if necessary even one Fleets Enema, 
I...

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"Some Timely Advice"


         Long ago when I was young
               some good advice 
...

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Spirituality is a tool for inner peace of the mind.
Acquire faith rather than admonish obedience.
Truthfulness is akin to the craving for faith in God.
Religion is a regimen of holy books yet entice.

Our spirits have a safe-house...

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This is the motivation behind why individuals look for Men's Petticoats progressively step by step. 

Notwithstanding, you need to work out control while styling a petticoat. Something else, an idiot proof style like this can...

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Private Residence

Sign at the gate – no solicitors –
Beyond the rosewood door sanctuary in seclusion
Untouched by hands racing round
A face framed by chimes and alarms –
Measures of mincing minutes
Exiled with suitcases packed
To astral planes of...

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Fitness guru (grew)
     to an abrupt screeching halt,
     i.e. did dramatically abate,
whence significant block of time,
     I formerly did allocate
(within recent past)
 ...

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I wax poetic as lifeblood imperceptibly doth wane

Mine body electric analogous 
to Google map pronounced 
with arteries and countless varicose vein
visible popping blood vessels  
leeches haven grand old time 
at expense of poor sucker...

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Somnambulant schlemiel schleps...and says Shalom...

to anonymous readers March 22nd, 2022
(blustery and chilly Tuesday)
reminiscing about mein kampf,
when precious irretrievable youth
frittered away within
emotional wilderness of mine.

Into lonely senescence -
more'n three plus decades 
plus three extra orbitz 
around...

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the new renaissance
pushed the envelope too far
actions speak louder than words
under my thumb from your torture
I must confess im obsessed
cant stop thinking about you
for one day

No need for us to buy records or movies
just disgusting
disgusting
couldn't...

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Schlerotic schlemiel schleps...and says Shalom...

to anonymous readers March 6th, 2021
(blustery and chilly Saturday)
reminiscing about mien kampf,
when precious irretrievable youth
frittered away within
emotional wilderness of mine.

Into lonely senescence -
three plus decades already elapsed
trepidation, hesitation, abdication... unbearably
tugging, shouldering,
remonstrating...

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Johnny always wanted to follow in his father’s footsteps,
as soon as he turned 18 he joined the US Army-
He wanted to live of life of honor, free of regret,
so he joined the one and only...

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The third of June is my father’s birthday,
it’s like a red-letter day for me to remember;
Though he’s gone now into the silent land,
his memories still linger in my heart and mind.

  I was still...

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"One Soulmate Love To A Lifetime"


                            There is...

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Aging baby boomer
no longer fit as a fiddle
accumulating extra adipose tissue
around the middle
ain't no impossible mission
whence thumbs I twiddle
to shed unwanted 
weight methinks exorcise to unriddle.

Call to action necessitates
yours truly to acclimatize,
calling fitness trainer
whereby honed...

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I grow increasingly concerned
about living in an unhealthy monoculture
of educational
evangelical
judicial
legislative hubris

Rhetorically LeftBrain dominant
verbally debating
which empowered opinion leader
will improve my personal consumer powers
and ego-incorporated 
greed productive profits

In this competitive big Dog
eats little not leftbrain dominant 
feminized...

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If you want someone to change your world,
Don’t give up on the sick girl.

You may see her walking down the street,
But you won’t know of her struggles because she is so discrete.

You would never guess...

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Schlerotic schlemiel schleps...

Into lonely senescence -
three plus decades already elapsed
trepidation, hesitation unbearably
tugging, shouldering,
remonstrating accumulation
of "baggage" thumb

of right hand thrust out
silently raving, quaking
cursing ultimatum parents
(soffit to fascia in)
saw fit to fashion
and hammer home

red hot poker rage
their...

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Might help explain how fruit
full this harmless poetic brute,
(a Methacton School of hard knocks
grad), who sports astute
demeanor with ample
brew netted locks,
vaguely androgynously cute,

his trademark signature hirsute
unstyled wavy hair
tell tale characteristic,
not that I care if anyone
gives...

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Seroquel made me sleep and gain weight,
 Abilify constantly made me pace,
 But Paxil made me lose my cool,
 Plus talk too much like a fool,
 And Geodon gave me insomnia of late...

So either fattened...

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many a december twenty forth gone by, 
whence wisp of carolers ghosts hauntingly adorn
remembrance of sum...
er things passed along tummy 
from ma late ma alm 

compunction eruption viz:
fruition, gumption interruption 
sans redemption how became re:...

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