Long Nervous wreck Poems
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My own gypsy roaming in countless hemispheres
A painter who splashes emotions of life’s tones
Maybe a lightkeeper flaming a child’s wonder
Also, a bookworm awed by enigmatic anti-heroes
My siblings’ event planner for grand occasions
Yes, a film buff loading adrenalin at plot’s turn
This off-key singer come open mic time
An insolent activist when values are compromised
My kin’s nervous wreck... afraid of heights
A non-stop dancer jigging even on tabletops!
Indeed, an angel card reader faking psychic powers
A believer of joy based on destiny number 7
The female version of Pan trapped in child-like whims
An incurable romantic who dreads goodbyes
This poet draining the marrow of a parched pen
A meditation/ yoga soul grounded in nothingness
Thus, one pilgrim in search of my higher self’s grail
~ In my roller-coaster, charmed world, I am still
finding parts of myself that thirst to be known.
I AM Contest
Sponsor: Andrea Dietrich
5/11/2020
Im addicted 2 me Im addicted 2 self
Im addicted 2 flesh I checked myself
into rehab becuz I tend to relapse Ima nervous wreck Ima
mess yeah Im forgiven by repentance but still I get
tempted I fall short so I deserve conviction, but Im missin
da big picture
tryin 2 keep my eyes on da mission
his 7 step program is what I need 2 hold on 2 I need to
behold u
Im so wrong its da same ol song
my back feels like its forever on da wall, but then I find da
strength to
put on da whole armor & give all things to da king dats
risen I gotta bear my cross count da cost I was once lost
dis addiction almost overtaken me now Ima livin
testament for others in the same situation all because our
father which art in Heaven never forsaken me
"That's my name, don't wear it out!" She sings
I can almost hear her voice echo
as I put on her earrings
Lily of the valley
carved next to your name
The tattoo on my back
is an image quite the same
Curled up next to you
on the arm of your favorite chair
I ask you to read me a story over again
It's the fourth time, but you don't care
Sleepovers at your apartment
fried chicken and Chinese checkers
I remember how hard you laughed
when I put in your dentures
I remember the car ride there
Sunshine peeking through your hair
You said it was the best you felt in a while
That made my mom smile
Suddenly across the room
Your face flushed
To your side, everyone rushed
You reached up
Hands near your neck
Everyone in the room a nervous wreck
I run outside
I'm told you'll be fine
I go back in through the back door
They have you laid out on the floor
Circle of people surround you
my mom on the phone
The ambulance comes and gets you
Mom and Dad take me home
I remember you on the gurney
You had a blanket that was white
Dad said "don't you worry
Grandma will fight"
Small hospital room
The family all near
The kind nurse tells me to talk to you
she says you can still hear
I went home that evening
and I guess so did you
but not to your same apartment
You had a new home with a view
In the front of the room
My aunt told me not to be scared
I finally get to see you
I run my fingers through your hair
Six angel statues line your casket
each a piece to remember you
I slip a note in your drawer
Hoping you'll read it an remember me, too
I feel guilty I don't visit your grave very often
But I know you aren't really in that coffin
You're saying this is the best you've felt in a while
And that makes me smile
A very special treat when I was a lad,
Was going to J C Penneys with my Mom and Dad,
To visit Santa sitting upon his elegant throne,
Hoping my youthful follies with him I could atone!
I'd been warned by Mom throughout the year,
That if I behaved I would have nothing to fear,
Because somehow Santa knew if I'd been bad or good;
If good, toys beneath the tree was a likelihood!
So with fingers crossed I hopped up on his knees,
To make known to him my youthful pleas.
After hearty ho-hoing he got around to asking me,
What I wanted him to leave beneath the Christmas tree.
I gave him my list and he said, "I can't guarantee,
But I'll do my best if you will promise me,
To leave a snack other than cookies and milk,
Like salami and cheese or vittles of that ilk!"
I was a nervous wreck, my angst hard to conceal,
Wondering if Santa would stick to his end of the deal.
There were heaps of toys when I awoke on Christmas dawn,
And mysteriously, all the salami and cheese was gone!
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired (© All Rights Reserved)
never necessary
is a full cup of hate
my movements are
my medicine
my choices are my health food
watching you sleep on the
passenger side as i avoid
the highway admiring the scenery,
i shake my head with a smile because
i have never met one with quite the
personality such as yours
as we arrive to our destination, i cannot
help but think back again to a time when
my only travails were the occasional daydreams
in the back of a dark movie theater
now here i am....a participant in a picture....
experience being the ultimate autograph....
i find myself thanking God without knowing,
which brings me back to earth
checking in to this hotel once unaffordable,
i, for some reason, become a nervous wreck,
oh what the heck....then i look at you....holding
the same oar as me....it is then that i realize that
i am not the only one posing with movement
never necessary
is a whole pint of regret
my plan making is my rehabilitative scrapbook
my decisions from here are my mirror image results
She’s still a long way away from here,
Even though I’m holding her hand,
She’s still running fast, alone in her head,
Even though, together, we stand,
And she stares through the things that she could’ve seen,
Blind to the world she’d have known,
Blind to the happy and vibrant and free,
Instead, in her mind all alone,
She lives with her phobia, her P.T.S.D.,
She lives with her panic disorder,
She lives with every form of unease,
She’s a nervous wreck sort of a hoarder,
But, she manages, with wine, her sweats and her dizzy,
She manages the pain in her chest,
She manages, with a pack of smokes every day,
And her mind runs away when depressed.
I watch you while you sleep today,
Emotions, so strong, sweep over me.
A love so strong, it takes my breath away,
It consumes my soul, mind, and body.
I remembered the day we met,
How it was to see your handsome face.
I was a nervous wreck, full of butterflies and fret.
Prepared for you to bolt, but that was not the case.
That first kiss was so powerful,
It was as intense as could be,
I felt the “fireworks”, it was very magical.
That first kiss and your love have set me free.
Travel to four years down the road,
It is now the day we will wed.
My heart so full, I fear it shall explode.
Ecstatic that my heart had not been misled.
We are now husband and wife,
Forever, we are to be entwined,
I thank the Lord for our life,
And the path for us, that He has designed.
Form:
Someone near and dear to me
Has a child with Downs Syndrome,
Who, more often than not
Is beyond difficult to control.
The little boy is six years old
But acts as if he’s two,
He can’t speak at all, just yells a lot
Throwing wild tantrums until he’s blue.
He likes throwing things around
As if everything’s a toy,
And has difficulty distinguishing
Between bad behavior and pure, ecstatic joy.
(And his mother is a nervous wreck,
always picking up after the boy).
His fingers are his eyes at times
As textures are his friends,
If he doesn’t like the way it feels
He won’t go there again.
And he likes to lay down on the ground
Balling up like a boulder,
Until someone comes to pick him up
While he gives them his cold shoulder.
It’s difficult to fully describe
All the nuances of this child,
The range of his emotions
From anger and sadness to his beautiful, blissful smile.
(And his mother is a nervous wreck,
walking many lonely miles).
They wonder about his future
And those around him always near,
And wonder how much happiness
Will follow him through the years.
Will he learn to play an instrument
Or dance and sing a song,
Is it possible he will marry someday
Will true love come along?
Will he find friends who will love him
And treat him sweet and kind,
Or only those who will shun him
And close him off like blinds.
(And his mother is a nervous wreck,
And losing her own mind.
His mother is a nervous wreck
And loves him
All the time).
© Terrell Martin, 02/26/2025
Your presence echos
In the shadows of doubt
Living has lost its light-
Unable to catch my breath
I retreat
I surrender
It doesn’t make sense
And life keeps going-
Faster it seems
And as the tsunami hits-
You relive it again
I now hate hospitals
I did before
But now it’s confirmed
It doesn’t matter if it was fate
Or timing-
I still hate them
And the memory they bring
It’s scraped into my brain
With a dull knife
I never knew you could feel pain from your head to your toes
Never really able to catch your breath
But you move on-
You have to
And there’s moments of joy with habitual smiles
Under a nervous wreck-
A volcano
Ready to erupt at any moment
Any thought
Any spiral.
If only one more day
If only the promise of one more conversation
Some sort of closure
Anything to fill this empty void
A loss star trapped in a black hole
Siren on the rocks
wearing a see through veil
your irresistible, I’ve been following your beguiling trail
Siren by the cliff
I’m blinded by your voice
a tongue so beautiful at last I now rejoice
Siren on the shore
I’m drowning can’t you see
please dance one last time,
dance on top of me
A ship wreck
a nervous wreck
I wanted to be seduced, what the heck
Tired of the sea, bored to death
clinging to a drop of water, I sink into the depths
A prosaic life finessed within a brick
harnessed between mortar, propped up by sticks
Merely hanging on, nothing ever happened
on the level, plodding along, grinding to a halt
Foundation was never solid, it’s my own stupid fault
Damn this withered earth, going around in circles
following a ball of fire, how basic life denies, I don’t care anymore
Dance on me siren, trample me as I die
That song you sing, I’ve heard it once before
chanting incantations, swaying to and fro
Reassuring me, if I ever had a doubt
life was meaningless, up until now
that song her song is beautiful
Yes I remember it somehow
never again shall I forget
as she tramples me to death
By
David Kavanagh