Long Luck would have it Poems
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It has been brought to my attention by Elvis fans,
not to mention a slew of phone calls from irate Elvis impersonators
that my last poem was very insensitive.
For that I would like to apologize.
I would also like to set your minds at ease and inform you
that in no way were any corpses harmed in the writing of...
"Are You Lonesome Tonight" (AKA Digging On Elvis)
Although Elvis didn't hold up so well
on the trip back to Graceland...
As luck would have it though Walmart
was having a special on large trash bags.
Two for one! And the environmentally friendly ones too!
We all know how hard it is to find those on sale!
Now where was I...
Oh Yea!
So we were able to get every last piece of Elvis
safely back to his final resting place.
Once again let me apologize for any harm I've caused
the hundreds, no let's make that thousands...millions
of Elvis fans and Elvis wannabes.
Sincerely yours and a fan myself,
Mike
P.S. I'm also somewhat of an Elvis impersonator:
Pass me one of them there jelly doughnuts will ya...
Pretty good uh?
Maybe you have to be there...
In southern Colorado,
that old Rocky Mountain state,
beneath God's azure heavens
is a place called Turquoise Lake.
I'd been driving all around,
it was time to take some lunch.
The lake looked right for fishing,
at least that was my hunch.
After chow I got my gear
and headed for the shore.
I tied on a jitterbug,
who could ask for anything more.
Weedy cover on the left
set off a loud alarm,
but I was casting to the right
just to limber up my arm.
From behind an old man came,
he'd been watching for a while,
"Surface lures won't work out here,"
he mumbled with a smile.
"You know this is a trout lake,
they won't hit on surface lures,
so get yourself a fly rod
and you'll catch some fish for sure."
Now just as luck would have it
you know where the next cast goes,
it's just off of the weed bed,
how that water did explode.
A Rainbow Trout grabbed my lure
and started on a run.
I was fishing ultra-light,
it was really lots of fun.
The oldster stood in wonder,
said he never would have thought
that on a rig like I had
a Rainbow could be caught.
Reluctantly the trout gave up,
he came in without delay.
I gave him slack and he was gone
to fight another day.
When I was eleven years old, my family took a cross-country trip out to the western
United States.
Along the way, we made a stop at a gas station / grocery store off the beaten path
somewhere in Arizona. Out front of the dilapidated store was an old Indian in full
Indian regalia sitting in front of a hand painted sign that read: “Best Memory in the
World. Never forgets a thing.”
Curious, I walked up to the old chief and asked, “If you never forget anything, what
did you eat for breakfast on your eleventh birthday?”
The leathery old Indian stared at me for the longest time before simply
replying, “Eggs”.
By this time my father was calling me back to the car and I left the old Indian chief
somewhat skeptical about his self-acclaimed World’s Best Memory.
Thirty years later, I was re-creating my family’s trip out west with my own wife and
children. As luck would have it, we stopped at the very same gas station and the
old Indian Chief with the same old sign was still sitting out front in his chair.
Excited, I told my children that I had seen this very same Indian years ago when I
was just a kid. I said, “Come on, let’s go talk to the old chief.”
So I walked up to the old Indian Chief with kids in tow, raised my hand and said in
my best Indian voice, “How”.
Without blinking an eye, he responded, “Scrambled.”
If I could only maneuver about
Or manipulate this stone
Then perhaps, by chance
I'd loosen the grout
This mountain, I would hone
Maybe I could toggle a bit
Molding my world of clay
Evaluate and calculate
Every inch of every day
If luck would have it
I'd be dealt a pleasing hand
If smart enough to grab it
I could answer the game's demands
But experience whispers
Reminders from the past
Struck down by spurs
Unfinished tasks
Just a thought that I've been thinking
An idea I've bounced around
Proceeding ideas that resulted in sinking
Inevitably we all will drown
So I become quiet, calm and still
The evil voices subside
I fall to my knees, before God, I kneel
Surrendering worldly pride
I hear a verse, I've heard before
It lingers and rolls off my tongue
I can do all things through Christ
Once I open the door
I recall the cross where he hung
My charred motivation begins to spark
Before long, my fire, restored
For that moment my vision is razor sharp
It belongs to me once more
I know that there will come a season
Floods of frustration will take my breath again
A chill of doubt will leave me freezing
If I am quite enough, I'll hear God's voice through the wind
Twas the nite before and all through the house, everyone lustful even the mouse
I in my towel and her in a thong
No way in hell this night could go wrong
Then out in barn there arose such a clatter
Boobs and nuts flying we went to see what was the matter
And what to our lustful eyes do we see
But eight naked women with a santa hat just for me
So sat down i did filled with such pride
If only on me they all wanted to ride
With a titty here and ass over there
My girl with her thong yea i didnt even care
So as i settled into what i believed was a dream
With a smile that was brighter than the brightest light beam
Now you wonder what could possibly happen to make this any better
Although i got harder she got wetter
Let me enlighten you for much to my dismay
The next instant i was bound and forced to watch them play
My dick rose quick i must admit
But not one came over and offered to sit
As i was fixin to complain in my most persuasive tone
I saw my girl and the toys she was being shown
Her eyes lit up and she made her choice
Next all i heard was an odd strange little voice
Next to my ear was whispered watch as she enjoys
Watch as we stretch her with those enormous toys
Then what in this fantasy dream of mine would happen
Those eight naked women were between her legs lappen
Stroke for stroke they each shared equally
I came so fast yet they never even touched me
Finished with her they start to come my way again
And Just as my luck would have it i chose to wake up right then
So now each christmas eve i close my eyes tight and fast
Thinking maybe the dream would return and i wouldnt cum so fast
Every christmas morning turns out sadly the same
I wake up still horny with no one to blame
In order to save some money
Which in hindsight wasn't smart
Me and my buddies got together
To make our own fireworks
And as luck would have it
We found all we need under the kitchen sink
The whole time looking to do this cheap
Instead we came out free
Knowing this day would draw a crowd
As soon as the rumor mill filled up
So in our vast wisdom with a few cells missing
We mixed the batch up in Jimmy's tub
Not being exact on science
As illustrated in that magazine
We felt no need to measure
And might have gone a bit extreme
As soon as the stuff started bubbling up
That thought did cross our minds
Remember at the start, saying it wasn't smart
And that little mention of hindsight
With the size of the flash, little wonder we're not ash
And still have all our fingers and toes
It's hard to explain the size of the bang
And why now Jimmy's house is one big hole
But we did put on a show not soon forgotten
That could be seen from outer space
And where Jimmy's house used to be
There's now a community pool in it's place
So come and join us on this holiday
Burgers, beer, and of course fireworks
In fact we're heading to Davy's house now
To mix a few things up...
What's my love for you keep leaving
But a.... broken heart and grievin'
How's a man supposed to carry on this way
What once was our tomorrows
Is now.... feeling more like sorrow
And your distance keeps driving me insane
A man with two hearts, feels twice the pain
One knows what it wants, and the others ashamed
To admit what they both know
It's like they're one in the same
A man with two hearts feels twice the pain
I've poured one heart out
To have it fall on deaf ears
For me it's been easy
From her it's not clear
I battle with what's right
But how we're living is wrong
And I can't tell the difference
Which side each is on
A man with two hearts, feels twice the pain
One knows what it wants and the others ashamed
To admit what they both know
Cause the truth still remains
A man with two hearts.... feels twice the pain
There's been times that I wished
I didn't want her so much
But as luck would have it
Both hearts feel the crush
The weight of my wanting
Lays heavy on my mind
She's the only thing I think of
With these two hearts of mine
A man with two hearts, feels twice the pain
One knows what it wants.... and the others ashamed
To admit what they both know
They're really one in the same
A man with two hearts feels twice the pain
A man with two hearts, feels twice the pain
When they're both wanting the same......
In order to save some money
Which in hindsight wasn't smart
Me and my buddies got together
To make our own fireworks
And as luck would have it
We found all we need under the kitchen sink
The whole time looking to do this cheap
Instead we came out free
Knowing this day would draw a crowd
As soon as the rumor mill filled up
So in our vast wisdom with a few cells missing
We mixed the batch up in Jimmy's tub
Not being exact on science
As illustrated in that magazine
We felt no need to measure
And might have gone a bit extreme
As soon as the stuff started bubbling up
That thought did cross our minds
Remember at the start, saying it wasn't smart
And that little mention of hindsight
With the size of the flash, little wonder we're not ash
And still have all our fingers and our toes
It's hard to explain the size of the bang
And why now Jimmy's house is one big hole
But we did put on a show not soon forgotten
That could be seen from outer space
And where Jimmy's house used to be
There's now a community pool in it's place
So come and join us on this holiday
Burgers, beer, and of course fireworks
In fact we're heading to Davy's house now
To mix a few things up...
As luck would have it
I chanced upon the secret
of finding things not looked for,
to enlist serendipity on cue.
The more you look the less you see.
Stop looking for, and start looking about.
Expectation kills spontaneity.
So, stop planning itineraries.
If you take a planned tour
on a planned route to see
the things you quest for,
You'll only get what you ordered on the menu.
But if you look about
and see an opportunity
in an open door off the beaten track,
you are ready to allow chance
happenings to surprise you.
Many great discoveries
in Science were made this way:
Penicillin discovered in dirty dishes, after a vacation
The micro-wave oven, when chocolate bar in pocket melted
Post-it note, a not so sticky glue
Velcro, when hiking and seeing how burrs hook onto hair
Radioactivity, when Uranium left on photo plate in drawer overnight.
Two things stand out here:
Firstly, doing something unusual, unplanned, as if by accident
Secondly, being aware that the unexpected has happened,
and taking time to investigate it.
An inquisitive mind feeds on serendipitous encounters.
The opposite of serendipity is *zemblanity:
Which is discovering unlucky expected outcomes you planned for,
when you make unhappy, unlucky and expected discoveries by design.
It is the inevitable unsurprising uncovering
of what we expected, and would rather not know.
So now you know, it is better
to look about, than to look for,
to allow serendipitous encounters
to happen more by chance.
---------------
9 May 2017
I had been studying to make Sergeant,
And was scheduled for the afternoon promotion board.
To get some practice and test the waters,
I volunteered for the morning's Soldier Of The Month Board.
The Battalion recently had been given
A ticket for the well-known Berlin Orientation Tour.
During the in-brief, the Battalion Commander
Said the ticket would go to the soldier with the highest score.
As luck would have it, I won;
Beating out by a quarter of a point a Staff Sergeant.
Not only was I going to Berlin for a week,
I was recommended to be promoted to E-5 Sergeant.
The Berlin Orientation Tour didn't count as leave;
As it was considered Permissive Temporary Duty (PTDY).
Riding the duty train to West Berlin
We had to keep all the windows shaded through East German territory.
The Wall had already come down by then,
But the Soviets were still occupying East Germany.
As a group we toured a modern museum
Documenting how some East Germans had escaped to be free.
One day we passed through Checkpoint Charlie,
And saw the Soviet monuments and troops in East Berlin.
I collected pieces just chipped off the Berlin Wall
Instead of drinking coffee in the cafés of Berlin.