Long Horny Poems

Limericks II - Nature Poems and Animal Poems

Dot Spotted
by Michael R. Burch

There once was a leopardess, Dot,
who indignantly answered: "I’ll not!
The gents are impressed
with the way that I’m dressed.
I wouldn’t change even one spot!"



Clyde Lied!
by...

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I think he's talking about a cooperative bicameral political system,
with "How to talk to the other side".

And what could that possibly mean, dear Yang?

Well,
I was watching this Ted-talk from Marin,
by Robb Willer, as I anciently...

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Sonnets LXXI-LXXX

Because You Came to Me
by Michael R. Burch

Because you came to me with sweet compassion
and kissed my furrowed brow and smoothed my hair,
I do not love you after any fashion,
but wildly, in despair.

Because you...

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‘Bout 8:15 this morning, on the bus that I was riding, I overheard a woman tell some gal it seemed she knew,
Her pastor - reverend Bishop - and a “tacky looking woman” we’re spotted leaving...

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I don't know what came over me that day - an instant of weakness after years of resistance, I suppose.

My beaming spouse leads me, a dog on a short leash, into the forbidden citadel, the...

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Here's the scoop, friends...like a bunch of my pieces now posted - and coming soon - this is, as indicated, the 1st HALF of this fairly lengthy poem. The 2nd half had to be posted...

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“I prob’ly shouldn’t be telling you, Marge, but...knowing I can count on you to never tell another soul...get a load of this!
Just as I was hoping, my biggest prayer was answered - and after barely...

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White old men are kind
White old men are divine
White old men are my brothers
White old men are inviting me to supper
White old men are my dream
White old men are very clean
White old men want to...

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Nightmare 8. To Lose the Gift of Feeling Heard

Is each person not poet when he spills his heart?
Has your verse lost its edge if it’s true no one listens,
Or does God mean that no one...

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“Ten Years, Somewhere in their Lost Neighbourhood”

Of course,
he said, like a god,
there is no course,
one must simply go with the flow
the penumbra stands waivering its existence,
a kind of deactivation, fuzzy borderline hanging, 
backing the art...

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Impossible mission to sleep on opposite side of marital bed...

Oddly enough even 
when frolicking in the autumn mist
with seasoned super tramping 
cheaply tricked out goo goo dolls
some resembling Indigo Girls,
one foo fighting beastie boy
unable to...

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          Johnny and Amber

To get my mind off war and inflation
I’ve watched the trial for defamation.
  But from what I’ve heard
  that scorned Amber...

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foisted upon her was the merry go round crystal chandelier

it stuck in her beautiful mind like a beacon of flaming desire

of clouds fried by a cuckoo with an indestructible socket

her eyes wide upon pupils dilated...

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Book 2
“Next we will use and abuse, the wedge of doubt.  To place a misgiving, a slight of hand, an apprehension into the day,  to mold the day thoughts of these apes, these...

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Her cognition is sporadic
Longing for her to relax
And display calm tactics
Lay on my chest like it’s a hammock
When she isn't calm
I can't stand it
Cause behaviors like these in women
Can easily become habits
It won't happen to...

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I have been used to living alone for so long
I am determined and easy going but headstrong
This morning was rather strange because I was on the train
I woke up with people gallivanting around me in...

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Oklahoma cowboy, tough coal miner’s son
Born in Henryetta, south of Tulsa some
Raised by daddy’s momma, taught him wrong from right
Daddy taught him ropin’, taught him how to fight
 
Herding made no money, its stock was...

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Information caused qualitative culture,
some might say cussed culture,
but, whether damned or graced,
culture, or vulture,
languaged-left hemispheric information 
languished after right-brained exformation
self-regenerated human in/out-side culture.

Human culture preceded human race
and DNA races
and racism
and socioeconomic language boxes 
and hierarchical...

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Stricken with turbulence at about seventy two inches

Yours truly issuing a deafening rebel yell
bursting forth with such might
courtesy cooking under pressure
analogous to volcanic upswell,
forcing me quickly to flap vestigial wings
(at the speed of sound)
while simultaneously...

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Let the drums beat until it release the number sheet
Let the drums beat until it rip out my heart's seat
Let the drums beat until blood spill in the street
Let the drums beat until justice is...

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I am a virgin slammer,
Let me get that over with,
So if I stammer and speak like a bludgeoning hammer,
Let the record be clear: I’m just trying to go with this.
So I won’t walk the walk...

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Adolescent infatuations...never consummated

Greetings reader from a cross between an aging seventy inch long (ringing ding dong) haired pencil necked geek and a Norwegian bachelor farmer wannabe; meaning yours truly actually a virtually married Pennsylvania man,...

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It is Friday and cars are rolling down the street
It is Friday and I can feel your heart beat, 
I know that you are thousands of miles away
 My spirit is yearning so come and...

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I wish I didn't suck at telling her how overwhelmingly strong I feel
I wish sometimes I wasn't so blunt, offensive, and abrasively real
I wish I knew the words to secure her entire weary heart
I wish...

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APRIL TO THRILL ME

                My Birth-Month April appears in mirth.
          ...

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