Long Heavy heart Poems
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"You shall not chase my gloom away!
There's such a charm in melancholy."
(Samuel Rogers, 1814)
I think, I was born under the shadow of melancholy. I was a woebegone girl
since birth. My mother said she never saw anyone with such an aching heart.
To me there was anguish and agony everywhere in my world. At the side of
the road, a dead bird would bring me to tears and with a heavy heart I would
hold a funeral. My parents refused to let me bury squirrels but I prayed quite
mournfully for their souls. When my sister died in childhood, I was overcome
with grief and downhearted. I became desolate and miserable. In my eyes
there is a sadness still that could shatter glass, it is so sorrowful. As I grew up,
I was a moody girl, taken to reflection and reverie, deep in my innermost
thoughts and morose- and thus a poet was born.
broken bleeding heart
there is such heartache to see-
beautiful sadness
___________________________
July 16, 2019
Poetry/Haibun/Melancholy
Copyright Protected, ID 19- 1166-845-02
All Rights Reserved. Written under Pseudonym.
Journey Journal Page
CHANGE
By Leon Enriquez
Change comes around
In a pin-prick poke
Sharp as a hard yoke
Not much of a joke
Off-balance, aground
A shaft of light
In a piercing way
Broken in free play
In a dying slay
As distraught feel fights
~~~~~~~~~
An abrupt flight
As heavy chains goad
Mind in overload
Blown tyres on the road
As deep dark blots sight
A future bleak
With stubborn ego
Uncertain and slow
Yet grinds blow for blow
In grim mindset weak
~~~~~~~~~
Vain is the cast
Of I, myself, me
In lost tragedy
Of strange irony
Spot-on first to last
Resolve that fear
Discord with sharp change
Bitter gall tastes strange
Witness to odd range
Devoid of good cheer
~~~~~~~~~
Thus in my soul
My heavy heart strains
My mind thinks in vain
My body sustains
A broken touch whole
Where is the source
Of my urgent feel
Sad uncharted spill
Lost cause beyond thrill
Change breaks upon cause
~~~~~~~~~
Unease feeds plain
Concern hosts lost wit
Nothing in truth fits
Fragments in odd bits
Tying loose tact vain
Is there a light?
To show me just how
Change can thus endow
Poise right here and now
In my dismal plight
~~~~~~~~~
Perhaps love can
Re-route the mess
Conquer strain and stress
My deep fear address
Glitch of a lost man
So here I wait
Not too late by me
To wait on plenty
That dream most surely
By the gates of fate
~~~~~~~~~
Wait for the muse
To sprinkle deep touch
Strange music as such
To prevail as much
Taut nerves that amuse
Odd yet not strange
To arouse crisp sense
Beyond mere pretence
As feel fronts intense
That dangling loose change
~~~~~~~~~
Here abides truth
In a fine array
Unconcealed dismay
As aplomb portrays
A hidden sure proof
Now I know change
Abrupt and aghast
Neither first nor last
But swirling that blast
Too real to be strange
~~~~~~~~~
Leon Enriquez
06 January 2024
Singapore
In the serene silence before its flight,
amidst shifting shadows of the night.
She gathers her clouds for the pending storm,
then the clouds they take a darkened form.
From the sky falls a soft and gentle snow,
And feel a soft and warming glow
Snuggled in my fathers arms,
content with gaiety at winter's charm.
His soft and gentle voice sweetly sings,
I feel the great comfort that it brings.
I reminisce about his gentle lullabies,
and realize how swiftly time does fly.
Yet hope and faith together dwell,
it paints my healing o’ so well.
Invites my heavy heart to repose,
as wintry day descends to its close.
From glimmering stars in heaven's dome,
swiftly comes sweet memories of my home.
In the serene silence of the night,
As shifting shadow have taken flight.
They slip beyond the reach of sight,
where thought begins to lose its frame,
into the fabric of the air,
returning softly out of light,
to where no mind can speak their name,
releasing secrets hidden there.
They linger briefly on the face,
then leave what could not yet be said,
caught in the corner of a sleeve,
as something passes from its place,
until the self moves on instead,
To teach a heavy heart to breathe.
They fall to ground or disappear,
absorbed in surfaces unknown,
drawn into dust or skin or rain,
then fade beyond our sense of here,
as time unthreads what it has known,
A cold reminder of the stain.
They surface later, undefined,
as memory reshapes their role,
called grief or joy by shifting voice,
yet never fixed within the mind,
for meaning cannot keep them whole,
Driven by laws, and not by choice.
They alter what the body keeps,
a breath released, a slowing chest,
a subtle shift in inner weight,
so something quiet shifts and seeps,
toward what it is to come to rest,
And forgives the heart its heavy state.
There was once a man, so fair and so bold
He lived in a castle, with treasures untold
He had wealth beyond measure, and power to spare
But he lived his life, with no one to share
One day, he met a woman, so sweet and so true
She captured his heart, with a single glance at her view
He knew he had found, the love he'd been seeking
And he vowed to protect her, with everything he was keeping
Together they roamed, through fields and through streams
Their love grew stronger, like a rose in the beams
They laughed and they danced, under the moon's light
Their love shone brighter, than any star in the night
But alas, their happiness was not meant to be
For the woman grew sick, and the man was set free
He watched as she slept, with tears in his eyes
His heart was breaking, as he said his goodbyes
He vowed to never love, in that way again
For the pain of losing her, was more than he could sustain
But as he walked away, from the woman he loved
He knew deep down, that his love for her was never done
And so the man lived, with a heavy heart and a lonely soul
But he never forgot, the love he once knew
For even in death, their love remained true
A love that was stronger, than anything he knew.
He grew within a frigid place
No one thought those legs would ever part
A Dark Prince thawed her frozen heart
A member long and stiff like ice
Penetrates
Cuts through the cold
His seed
His power
They both take hold
Invade
Satiate
Invigorate
Skin white as snow
begins to glow
A subtle blush
She feels the rush
Heated up
Ever so slightly
His cold blue eyes
shine brightly
She screams in the night
Pleasurable blue light
Her senses take flight
Then the dark prince goes away
The night was night and this is day
There's no desire in him to stay
With a heavy heart on the bed she lay
For him just a thing of play
Inside
His seed
Her baby grows
What is happening
she does not know
Pulse is rapid it will not slow
Her red veins
turn to blue
There is nothing
she can do
Her heart now frozen
a block of ice
She thinks cold thoughts
that are not nice
Inside the child feeds on her
The days and nights become a blur
In the middle of winter
The Ice King is born
From fragile womb
his body torn
Arrival accompanied
by a storm
Those present become statued ice
The King extracts his sacrifice
His mother spared
To her his love he shows
She wraps him in blanket
of pure white snow
His skin translucent
begins to glow
All of a sudden
the Dark Prince appears
He commands bring the baby over here
I wish to gaze upon my son
He is a truly magnificent one
He looks closely at the baby's face
Resemblance more than just a trace
Blue eyes dark they extract a toll
Sucking up the Prince's soul
The Ice King
emerges
fully grown
Regally rises to take his throne
Mother cries
Blue magical tears
Time for coronation
Rapidly nears
Diamonds fall
onto the ground
Placed in ice
The King is crowned
Linda's Free Verse Contest
Thanks to Leonora Galinta for letting me weave a story
with her Ice King. Yanny's Dark Prince has also played a roll.
Also thanks to SKAT for posting the Ice King Contest,
if she increases the number of lines I will enter.
I wrote this one before I knew there was a contest.
Vivid pictures of you & I are constantly running
circles through my mind
The times we shared when together are playing
on a loop in real time
These moments shine as bright spots tend to draw
attention in dark times
My reflection brings me joy in a real sense so when
I have to see in the dark I don't mind
What we have is infinite & like Gods mind it can never
be equaled in any sense
When we met I found my match & it sparked a flame
that's burn only for you ever since
You activated this light in my heart space that's burned
brightly ever since
The sight of you still gives me chills to this day
activating my passion in this sense
Rose petals and flower scents fill me with strong
emotions like a heavy heart
My emotions flow like electricity through open currents
& having you in mind creates sparks
My fire still burns for you despite the distance as no
one but you can ignite these sparks
You'll always be that eternal flame that never dies
because of your permanent place in my heart
Veil of a light shine brightly to my face
blocks my view against a glance
unto the window of after today
each day I wake up I try
to take a glimpse
A stone of puzzle reside in my chest
the future remain not exposed
along the road of hope
As I struggle day by day with heavy heart
with focus that I will cope
Assume I'm a sibyl; am able to forecast all:
Years upon years as struggle go on
yet the future remains unknown
I know when is the time and what to do to succeed.
I will sleep and have fun till a wee of the second,
I will then do a little work and within
some weeks I'm successful
I conjure those who claim to be the seer
only HE is the knower and the seer
of an unfailing future
while tomorrow remain unrevealed or obscure
an unfailing future
as it is a tale of coming and going
as struggle for life goes on
She has a crack in her heart an feels her body’s a stranger.
She has nothing left but the feeling of having lost it all.
She mourns the future that will never be an struggles to see any light amongst the darkness in her heart.
She feels endless grief, a sadness that makes no space for anything else.
She’s mastered the facade of a life believed to be bright & happy but yet its so dull.
She is that women, that women that falls apart at closed doors, but the same one that has a glowing smile.
No one understands the way she hurts.
She tries hard to not to let the pain break her but it proves to, everyday she fights herself not to fall apart.
Each day is a different day but yet it feels the same. She re-lives the memory of mental pain an still sees the mirrored scars.
She fights to move on but the darkness in her heart won’t leave her, it follows her around like an old friend. But yet they are not friends, the darkness is her enemy.
I am alone, with silence biting deep into my bones,
It's not pure quiet, but a sharp stir, a void that gnaws at me,
It digs a dwelling in the marrow of my being, and I wonder,
Am I condemned to walk forever on dark paths,
With darkness as my only companion, an echo in the night?
The future flickers, like a flame in a storm, trembling,
From afar, like a living hope, it winks at me,
I stagger toward it, carrying within me the bones of all past days,
With the hope that the fire ahead will eventually burn,
The ghosts that haunt me, to lose them in the blaze.
But the ghosts are cunning, they change faces with masks,
Of those I've loved, words left unsaid in time,
Doors I dared not open, whisper sweetly like venom,
Until I forget where the present ends and the past begins,
And in the labyrinth of memories, I lose myself, without a compass.
I reach out, but in my palms remain only ashes and dust,
Every dream I embrace turns to powder,
Before I can breathe it, feel it flow through me,
And so, with a heavy heart, I wander among shadows and desires,
Hoping that one day I will find the path to a gentler dawn.