Long Germane Poems
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April 19th 2020 - just an ordinary and typical...
clothes washing Sunday courtesy the missus
Ah... the highlight of our supposed, linkedin,
designated day of respite after a week toiling
away with ennui, yes reader a tower mountain
(rivalling Himalaya's 29,029 foot range), oozes
odoriferous tendrils suffuse every square inch
within entire drab one bedroom apartment, but
invariably contribute to climate changing/global
warming), said domestic chore indulged with a
burst of fervent excitement (competing making
long day's journey into night long to retrieve the
requisite communication with outside webbed
wide world) bring joie de vivre je ne sais quois
weekly highlight to thyself vaccinated courtesy
(against adversity), and valued tough as (nine
inch) nails missus vaunted as Xena, methinks,
she exaggerates bajillion fold dubbing me with
appellation as herr (germane) Hercules, a miss
gnome er, I no longer nitpick amidst these most
challenging times where coronavirus COVID-19
(ironic violent crime plus environmental abuse
nearly absolute zero) engendering loyalty, high
fidelity, assiduity among madding crowd I (a runt
of mill garden variety generic doubting Thomas)
kin Hardy believe me myopic sudden inexplicable
camaraderie between and betwixt ordinary folks,
no matter, we (doddering, hobbling, & kickstarting)
long time married couple (seems like millenniums)
revel when washing clothes occasion arises, despite
modern time saving contrivances (washer and dryer)
available, but all monies larded out to buzzfeed icky
persnickety, rickety,... temperamental wishy washy
machines quickly (said cash & or cache automatically
line silver) pockets of Grosse and Quade, them iz zee
who own living facility here: 2 Highland Manor, yet
purportedly (according to rumor mongers aim to sell
property for fair market price) - just in case ye dear
reader seek to sink (literally) x dollars into formerly
owned Mars redoubt, and once upon time wetlands.
back a small number of years thee diva of this domicile
exhibited an aura, charisma, enigma…devoid of any guile
boot of late turned a cold shoulder to me and I’ll
avoid denigrating, haranguing, and lambasting said dell lisle
la, whose avoidance behavior toward me – who goes a mile
out of her way to ensure our paths do not cross – noah din nile
per the above – well, perhaps a slight bit of hyperbole
viz this, mine swift tailored, harried style
per potpourri of puzzling perturbation evinced
by said olde world germane German dame we lease this duplex
treating us, as if we committed some egregious crime
subsequently forced to stand trial
viz aversion toward this convivial, frivolous and introspective chap
methinks said realtor/renter joined a coven den
where doe eyed zen of thieves
occupy teaching rubric of mean-ness while
taking appropriate and selective pages from play book of sarah palin,
which tension unlikely to cease for the next nine months till the deed
doth expire, where by this witch a taw hook cans ass (ours) will be freed
of renting a long and fostered, roach and fox infested, century21
from once salient sympathetic ear this now manifested Scrooge like greed
reminding us (essentially via cessation of any interaction),
how she once did heed
to our various and sundry travails – though neither myself nor spouse,
the latter whose vociferousness regularly exudes loathsomeness
toward key per, once a vouch saving storied angel without fail and indeed
wife tis not shy to vent where a plethora of expletives lead
rant and rave toward an impending crisis that will me send out an SOS
ever felt compelled to join Hemlock society or drown sorrows in mead
yet disappointment arises, when formerly positive dynamic now im peed
did by reasons unbeknownst to me,
who feels grateful ye chanced to read
my babbling of poetically irrational from a regular Joe,
who doth not sport Harris Tweed
nor (despite any immediate intimations)
doth newt smoke booze nor drink week.
Gamesomeness goads gawky, gingerly,
goofily graceful, grandiloquent gent, gallant,
genteel, geico, guppy gecko, gabbling gaffes,
gagging, gamboling, gestating, gesticulating,
garlic, gnashing, gobbling, gyrating,
gruesomely grinning, grappling, gnomadic
giggly, grubby, gastrointestinally grumpy
gewgaw gazing guy, geographically germane,
gungho, grave gremlin, grumbling, guiding,
guaranteeing, guerilla gripped gatling guns
ginning gumpshun.
Hello! Herewith halfway harmless hazmat,
haphazard haggard, hectored, hastily,
hurriedly, harriedly hammered, handsomely
hackneyed, heady, hellbent hillbilly, hirsute,
hidden hippie, huffy humanoid, hexed, heady,
Hellenistic, holistic, hermetic, hedonistic
heterosexual *****sapiens historical heirloom,
homeless, hopeful, holy, hee haw heretical hobo.
Indefatigable, iconographic, iconic, idealistic,
idyllic, inimitable, idiosyncratic, ineffable,
irreverently issuing idiotic, indifferent, inert,
ineffectual, ingeniously iniquitous, immaterial,
insignificant, indubitable, inexplicable, ignoble
itches, ineffectually illustriously illuminating
immovable infused ichthyosaurus implanted
inside igneous intrusions immensely
imperturbable improbable.
Many boyfriends as thou have of all kind,
Does not mean your beauty makes many blind.
Product of your maker, sell...
As affordable as hell;
So bury that alive in your pure mind
But don't lose faith for love in trust of men;
Cain and Abel cometh from Adam's den-
Who lost God's way to your type,
Yet produce good man so ripe
That still at death, seeks to forgive again...
Know this and know peace; of look don't dare hook,
For beauty isn't about pretty look.
Switch away from deception:
Switch onto nice exception-
One that defines mindful soul cum outlook.
Shine, let not kindness be sure to free time
But be of truth to bind tight schedule's prime
Around life threatening issues...
By love alone off abuse,
Timing faint tablet of wicked heart's grime.
Stay positive, there's time for every thing,
Chance brings people you meet in life's blue swing...
Heart designs the kinds you want,
Outlook signs the ones love flaunt...
To stay put cum germane revolving string.
Meanwhile, beforehand don't spoil your own show
As you keep rushing through process to grow...
Your blind tasty life's standard;
Buying out scheme hate slandered,
Just style end to justify means if slow.
'Course as a grim teller of tall tales,
(albeit poetic) reasonable rhyming
quasi roundelay I readily admitted to feign
cuz, stringing words together with
pride and prejudice plus
sense and sensibility, jocularity,
and conformity I dissed deign
(spoiler alert) iamb, trochaic,
dactylic, and anapestic metrical reign
jest your ordinary garden variety
dollar short day late dime a dozen
penniless citizen banker Abel and Cain,
yet mine mean mien blithely, daringly,
fatuously, ludicrously, nauseatingly,
pretentiously playfully urbane
many (if not all readers)
will coon sitter
yours truly harmlessly insane,
whose feeble attempts
to wax and wane
oft times falls flat (splat goes Matt)
as if dropped out plane,
without a parachute
instantly recuperating while lain
supine (winded, but...
none the worse) asthma brain
suffers concussion, confusion, contusion
actually, immediately, and unexpectedly
knocked fluent German speaking ability
within germane guy verständlich?
If ye really comprehend
trademark non Turkish gobbledygook
then explain (using
language of least familiarity),
but best to commence
with eye catching hook
impossible mission
apt lit pupils (mine)
to evade even momentarily
riveting, spellbinding,
and transfixing look
courtesy ingenious way
with word ye snook
cored me and took
wind out my sails.
Nor could I breakaway courtesy automobile,
cuz 2009 Hyundai Sonata
would not start... yea for real,
thus finding me ready to yoke
neck (think gibbet) each heel
dangling as body goes limp
blessedly, finally, happily
ridding me of any/all hangups,
one less goo goo gaga born this way
poker face cards for him to deal.
UNGABLUZUM describes this schlemiel!
Senescence concomitant
and best buds with malaise
despondency inescapable as
infirmity ages formerly young gals guys
though age just a "number"
father time not shy to apprise
every mortal wakes to the
inescapable truth that never dies
each living species mainly
one known as *****sapiens
allotted longevity not much
greater than highest
double digit which existence flies
at speed of greased lightning,
which passage of years
zip faster -- this strictly my
perception as one nears
cessation finally escaping
nasty, short and brutish
how to remain youthful lies
plugged by health
and fitness tricksters,
"FAKE" staunching
getting older decries
the science of biochemistry,
gerontology, kazoo whist tree, pathology...
though many consumers
spend bajillion dollars to disguise
and/or feebly stave off their demise,
oft times, yours truly (me)
doth not despise
the finality frontier, whereby body electric
ceases to function and this poet cries
against psychological torture of anxiety/
panic attacks linkedin to penuriousness
physiological symptoms
even with prescription medication
i.e. racing heart, chronically
sweaty palms, irritable bowels,
thus there ought not
be cause for surprise,
where salutary marital
bond bereft, when he dies...
finally free and clear
of Lake woebegone angst no lies
yet not courting danse macabre,
but occasionally sighs
pondering courtesy visit
qua grim reaper who allies
him/herself to every storied birth,
whose wish to live
long as Methuselah
an aspiration this
scrivener doth advise
against, no friends family,
nor lovely beau ties
remain, a near reality,
whereby alienation, I cannot excise
thus toy with suicidal ideation,
though ye might chastise
elusive joie de vivre impossible mission
to attain plus world growing
darker shadows along edge
of night with decreasing eye
cite, and gloomy prospect
Medicare maybe axed...
accursed fate eternal sleep
destiny or her her offspring
might hopefully exercise.
Soundlessly ricochet to and fro
hither and yon
roundly bobbing within squarely donned
talking heads of psycho killers,
one pyromaniac burning
down the crowded house
sparking magnificent conflagration
towering inferno emulating
caterwauling, kickstarting, ululating
(think) stray cats on a hot tin roof
nsync with 10,000 maniacs
intense heat and duraflame
long since eroding
weather beaten soul asylum
strip mining away
vestial trace, hence impossible mission
rectifying purposeless existence
imputed to passive self sacrifice
upon cusp of prepubescence
mystified, mummified, modified,
stilled, lulled, andhushed
obsessively grammatically fanatical
oftimes feeble efforts yielded countless
corrective editing measures
subsequently rendering lame
resultant deplorable effort
despite NON GMO gluten
and monosodiumglutimate free
diet of (hooked) worms
limply tethered symbolic constructs
analogous to dangling participles
scraping, plowing, etching...
imperfect triangulated Hollywood squares
across parched stream of consciousness
former luscious cerebral riverbeds
long since bone dry
millennium since onset climate change
courtesy global warming
blowing in the hot torpid wind
sands of time elapsed
accepted biological demise
forever linkedin with his forebears
birth/death repurposed cycle
activated, demonstrated, gifted...
integration, narration, reincarnation...
biochemical, geological, paleontological...
legacy randomly begetting me
epochal, integral, orbital saga
since time immemorial
fifty plus shades of once ashen gray
well muscled athletic human specimen
oblivious corpse good n plenti
petrified, metamorphosed, coalesced
bleached skull and crossbones
grown brittle when blazing sun's
rays generated aforementioned disparate ideas
jangled, rankled, and zapped
in tandem with bared tiger (no lion)
slapdash pell mell, helter
skelter, higglety pigglety...
germane blitzkrieg rained down above
leaving writer, tortured, mortified, and benumbed
without either sense or sensibility
nor pride and prejudice
perusing discombobulated chaotic
kamikaze lobbed muddlesome nonsense.
Autumn In The Air - Hooray
Respite from punishing
heat wave - yay
which above line,
could "speak" volumes,
and be a stand alone poem
offering readers
a reprieve nsync
whence roasting, sultry,
and torpid unpleasant
weather since yesterday
boot such brevity,
would disallow
me to extemporize,
but more importantly today
this intrepid word
smith doth "say,"
he would never
wanna miss trodding,
the formerly (golden
in their heyday now sketchy),
sections of said roadway,
now where digital electronic
rustily hinged, abandoned,
and gated haunting quay
a throwback, when
private manned schooners
(shaped like a beer stein),
perhaps headed to Uruguay
could ply outlying
waters of cyberspace,
why... just yesterday
when my troubles
did not seem so far away
versus this present opportunity
to risk live and limb
(and Kong like wrath
of my reed ding fans)
while getting way
laid "traveling as
Wilburys soul survivor
foreign ancient groupie,"
the dangerous, derelict, and dicey
dubiously dotting dilapidated,
dark corners information
super high way,
thus yours truly
doth not heed,
but flaunts like some cray
zee (NOT RICH, NOR ASIAN),
but rather some gray
beard (grizzled), curmudgeon
figuratively gnarled, toothless,
and weatherbeaten lackaday
lay about good for nothing
mellow flew wuss depraved
('cept mebbe "robbing"
precious and special time
of some bachelor
farmer from Norway)
all the above
essentially wrote for naught
merely (as diversion) to comment,
how this September day wrought
ascent o' fought
(a scent oh aught) tum caught
me wear'n a corduroy
long sleeve shirt since...aye taut
a "FAKE" hungry
Grimm gimlet eyed trumpeting lout,
germane Don apprenticed
how to become cannibalizing
(without accountability) fuhrer,
(and lastly rendering enemies
into sweet tasting sauerkraut),
this while learning das dialect
(tickle) Matt speak,
(which took me a lifetime),
this preceding the
quirky invention of the umlaut!
Scar tissue, birthmarks, happy times, and grief
Corrugate man’s brain, a coral motif
Emotions, synapses, signals unknown
Grotesque in nature, splits open when stoned
Still pictures emerge, filling us with dread
Trompe loeil jumps out, turning confused heads
A lasting impression, one little glimpse
Stare any longer, de-evolve back to chimps
Forthright altruism’s meaningful and straight
Love of people dilutes, when mixing faiths
Right angles on a cross, drew germane taste
Master race had its day, now laid to waste
New clear experience, turns sand to glass
Quartz for the reaper, forms in mushroom gas
Colliding atoms, there’s no other way
His sky vaporised, man sure seized the day
drip drip drip drip-feed of life ~ wait a gush all we needed was a knife
Another Day...Another Accursed Blank Screen
Ma wink'n and blink'n
mind nod yet awake,
nor insights keen,
asper ho hum usual, this
(day-glo bull leave
me you) after noon,
(October thirtieth
two thousand and eight teen),
mine myopic brown
marbled occipital orbs
fixate upon a
lone blinking cursor -
hooping such intense stare
will magically glean
a divine comedy,
or even mediocre
shaky spear writ tragedy, none
the less letting thoughts
glom (cess) pool like
into some elusive essence,
finding me madly chasing
(feebly, lamely, queerly
and ridiculously
likened to a teen
age paramour) intriguing,
nattering, and wordlessly
spellbinding notion
all the way to Abilene,
perhaps metamorphosing
into a topnotch
poem (ska lean),
swiftly tailored harried
style even out rivaling
the best newsy
Lake Woebegone fabulist
(formerly Nordic European)
scribes, that juiced might earn
me some crisp
legal tender green,
yet impetus to write,
NOT predicated on ram
ping up checking account,
which primary queen
tis essential money source
of mine to pay bills
appears extremely lean,
and thus apologize if
any hint of desperation
(PULL EASE pledge to
Matthew Scott Harris charity)
seeps extemporaneously typing
this poetic expression,
when financial resources
picked bone dry clean,
and me fanciful
thoughts cannot help
wishing for miraculous
intervention tub bring,
a raft of smiley faces
tomb eye gentle mien
such as receiving
an anonymous bajillion
dollars donated (tummy)
from tennis scene legend
(in her own mind)
aery Billy Jean
King, whose near
exhaustive earnings -
at least compared
to thy germane mein kampf
(accrued during - her mist
starry re:us horse sing around)
straw berry fields
forever hay day
with tangerine trees,
and marmalade skies
completing tennis
(tense) backdrop against
engendered match with
the late Bobby Riggs.