Long Frum Poems

:) now this is what Im talking bout .... nothin iz 2 uncommon when all you got 2 eat iz Ramen 
noodles 4 all y'all poodles
 seahorse sonar struggle with senses 
far beyond the realm...

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Stimulus check(up), visited mine local gastro-intestinal economy

Around high noon
today March 19th, 2021
fecal impaction I did plaintively croon
until effect courtesy amitiza, which
prescription medication
(in short a laxative)
served as amazing grace saving boon.

Once activated - impossible mission
to suppress...

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A fanta see overrides reality!

Hello?
I like to get positioned for sixty nine. 

Are you looking for a scheming, 
schlepping, and schvitzing writer? 
natural body and laid-back vibe??
I'm all about therapeutic touch via
bolts, nuts, screws 
and...

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I rested my weight on the dated metal green and white glider. I moved back and forth listening to the cracking sound that the glider forced out of the patched slats on Mama Ruth's front...

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Circa: 23rd of Tevet, 5760
     to 15th of Tevet, 5770
     in accordance
     with Hebrew date
(converted, asper Gregorian
     Calendar) courtesy...

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Hello?
I like to get six + 9 ??Are you??????
schlepping writer,?? natural body and laid-back vibe?? 
I'm all about therapeutic touch via nuts and life of bee dogged trees!

teasing with idealism beef hoar 
   illusory vision fades away
whatever ur...

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Her grand gals axed her one time
How did hers ever gits a date
Her done went ta a all gals school
Theys wudn't let no boys in
Ut makes me's won ders 
Yep ut sure do

Theys at that...

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FrUm thE NUMB TuM Of A BuM  RuM sPiL
                         ...

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The water tower stands above the town and can be seen for miles around.  It has a 
ladder leading up to the base of the tank.  This ladder has been climbed by countless...

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Brandin

I's jist gots back frum Y-OM_UN
An wents ta sees ma son un 'is wife
Thay war waitin fur a call ta goes helps a frien
An thays jist throwed me un.

Ut war un tha Kansas plains
Un thay...

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Ah war out a walkin
Ut war a Sunday morn
Mah chores war all did
Warn't no need fer me et home

Ah walks along tha river
What does goes by er place
Hearin tha crickets singin
Un watchin dragonflies un tha...

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We stopped fer a bite at the Gooseberry Patch, I reckon it wuz a week er so ago.
I wuz slurpin' my usual bowl uv chili - Boys! That stuff'll set yer ears aglow!
My spouse wuz...

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In the backwoods of Tenn-O-See eerie things is seen on Halloween night!
Stroll with me down a country lane - you'll see things that'll give ya' a fright!
I s'pose ya' could set by the far and...

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"Howdy to you all from Colorado!  This is Cletus Schlunk reporting,
Where gossip is fair and balanced and there is little or no distorting!
It's the home of the Rockies, Broncos, Nuggets and potholes galore,
And old...

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A cowboy ain't got no use fer the trappin's uv a meetin' house affiliation,
In which to commune with the Lord to git his religious inspiration!
He won't be corralled by a staid and sanctimonious congregation.
He's free...

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Arggh me hearties! We're takin' a long-awaited vacation!
Th' enchantin' isles uv th' Caribbean is ar final destination!
Hoist th' Jolly Roger an' them billowin' sails an' let's git 'er underway!
Th' Spanish Main is ripe fer pillagin'...

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A properly equipped cowpoke is bound to impress the boss.
He'll need a mount of course and a silver-studded saddle fer his hoss.
He'll need some chaps to protect his jeans frum them pesky burrs,
And his outfit...

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Skookum Jim wuz born the son uv a Chief uv the Tagish Injun tribe.
Ain't much known about his youth - ain't no totem left to describe.
'Tis known he wuz born in the Yukon where man...

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Glitterin' gold wuz struck along Alder's Gulch in eighteen sixty-three!
Potential prospectors came frum as fer away as Knoxville, Tenn-o-see!
Hordes uv soiled doves and gamblers migrated to the Gulch as well,
Along with platoons uv ruffians and...

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The serpentine and ageless liquid
   mercurial possessed snake
eternally swallowed 
   since the beginning of time
   one unquenchable thirst to gorge and slake
slurping up an icy cold mountainous pebbly shake
...

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An old cowpoke throwed his leg over the well-worn saddle horn,
And tilted back his ten-gallon hat that was sweat-stained and worn.
From his shirt pocket he took a Bull Durham tobacco pouch,
And with one hand made...

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"Rise an' shine you lazy cowpokes!  Time to saddle up yer hoss!
Time to move them moo-cows to summer range!" yelled th' trail boss!
"You've lolled around here all winter, now it's time to earn yer...

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"Young, skinny, wiry fellows needed!" want ads and posters stated!
(Thus the Pony Express to deliver the western mail was created!)
"You mustn't weigh over 125 pounds nor be over eighteen years of age.
We'll provide a horse...

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Don’ wanna bee roun ewe noh moh.
Don’ wanna see da trajuhdee dats heded,
At yah doh.
Ewe wuz vary ahful tah mi,
God’s chile. Eye didden doyah nuttin.
’
Yah ‘sposed,  tah bee ah liter rite?
Butt ya playin’ roun...

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I ain't about to reveal th' month an' year that I wuz born,
But here's a clue, cars than sported an ooogah, ooogah horn!
To start th' motor required enthusiastic spinnin' uv a crank!
On th' rutted roads,...

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