Long Drugging Poems
Long Drugging Poems. Below are the most popular long Drugging by PoetrySoup Members. You can search for long Drugging poems by poem length and keyword.
Judgement day is every day when you're trying to survive in a decent way. Clean up your life and move away, to a new playground for the kids to play. It's an Oreo cookie way of life, broader than black and white. Trying to break to the surface to see the light, but you keep getting suppressed.. it takes all your fight.
Drop out came a long way.. From counting stacks of 3 to a GED. On the outside mamma's so proud of me. But inside she's scared she don't want to see me take another fall, slip up and lose it all. X'ed up, punching holes in the wall. She's cautious for my life, she cries: "I wish you could see it through my eyes".
Accidentally got caught up in the game and chase again. Never had let go, the past was still holding onto my hand. Slowly takes over, but you keep it undercover. Keep it on the low, thinking nobody's going to know. But somehow I stayed on top of it. Only slinging and drugging on the weekends and ****. Got through my Friday and played on payday. Dedicated worker specialized in crazy.
Then one I day my end started to begin. I changed my life and I traded it in.. For a camouflage uniform that covered the scars on my skin. I ended up losing my freedom, tied down with conflicting feelings. Gun in my hand, I was told to defend, the pain and the hell that I had abandoned. The bad guy in trusted boots, ripped myself from my roots. I planted my self far from the town I was raised in.
Kind of felt like I was betraying there trust, leaving my love for a life that's lust.
But then again.. I finally felt filled inside, alive. Maybe there was a reason I looked at my past, and wanted to run and hide. No longer scraping dough to get high. Now I see it again, that pride. The sparkle in mamma's eye. And for the first time it ain't a tear from fear. Can't plan ahead a god damn year. Now she has hope instead of dread, from that knock on the door saying: "Your little girl's dead."
I opened my eyes and I stopped listening. Closed my ears to the phrases of hustlers. "Act classy, you're a lady" was all they could muster. How did they think ladies could survive in these streets? Double standards of life, a game you'll never beat.
I lived how I wanted, they said it was no place for a girl. But once I shared what I had, it became our world. I found the "I" in family, once the pain killers got a hold of me. They kill the pain but bring the misery.
The hues of affliction caught my glimpse
Maddening horror scratching my doorstep
Clashing with severe torture,
Scorching away my destiny...my confidence
Hallucinations take hold
Risk shoved in a deserted briefcase
Pluck the rose pedals that reveal your wasteful woe
Now your woe is crystal clear in your outspoken instructions you very much lack
Magnify the dazzling sensation,
Drugging my suicidal life and its troubles
Sparkling risk managing to parachute a confident endeavor from each angle
Crawling on poverty road...managing to warp-up easing moments
Unsteady in your rambling presence
You are an incredible luck to my immortal life
Too unbearable to strike down...hunted on the spot
Magnify the dazzling sensation,
Drugging my suicidal life and its troubles
Trails of avarice, wonder my mind far from thee
I'd diminish all the doubts...clumps of shapeless clay
Save the case and listen to what I have to say
Keep me away from worrying mad
Digest the emptiness I feel deep inside
Leaving a trail of blasted fears
A mixture of fondness and softness
Plants on your brushed, blemished whisper,
The atmosphere fairly uneasy to take hold of
You borrowed from me and stole from my mummified heart
All I seek now is gloom and doom
Resume with your lightening life
Isolate yourself from hardened fear
Death stares grow unsteady in your figure
It was as if they never existed in your warm, swirling heart
I plead you'll never set foot on this road again
I'll some day figure out the unpredictable code
Be courteous, though your abilities are weak
Lay in dark affliction,
You warped-up poverty road
Walk in secure recovery
After I determine this code
Hold on for dear life
Lay on my palm, if it would help
Walk in secure recovery
I’m not sad, I’m scared... there’s a difference.
You see lately, I’ve been having these dreams.
Weird dreams, and they feel so real.
Like they’ve dug into the very secret that is myself,
and turned it inside out.
Opened me up, my insecurities awake to be taken advantage of.
Like the stupid little things that scare me the most,
and my bad memories have woven together.
I feel like I’m not in control.
Something is going wrong.
I wake up confused, scared,
I wake up in tears.
My dreams are brainwashing me.
I’m drugging my life away.
Quick fix, quick fix, take this, take this.
When can I take control.
How can I take control.
I feel the effects, the effects of love.
How much it hurts me.
Distance is good, but I get so scared.
I have complete trust in you.
But I feel like manipulation is growing strong.
It’s my dreams, they’re brainwashing me.
I feel hated, and that someone wants me miserable.
My dreams are brainwashing me.
I know the truth, at least the truth I’ve been open to.
I know reality, yet I’m still scared.
I’m scared of a lot.
Being hurt again, deceived, lied to.
Being stabbed in the back, again, by a friend.
Losing control, that scares me the most.
I feel like I’m slipping through my fingers.
It’s cold here... in my dreams.
Dark too.
I can barely make out the faces in front of me.
Truth is, it’s how they make me feel when they’re around,
That’s how I know.
Voices mean nothing, they’re all disguised.
They speak in riddles and in lies.
But it’s the feeling, the feeling I get,
That is how I know, I know not to forget.
It’s hard to explain, all of these fears.
My dreams have injected them into me.
It’s hard to hold on, to reality.
When my dreams, they’ve brainwashed me.
What are we doing? Shutting off the world like
a switch! Becoming faceless, tasteless, hopeless?
We cloud our minds with different kinds of topics.
From TV shows to cell phone woes, which celebrity
is cheating, and the wife already knows!
We close our ears and cover our eyes, to the
truth, as we choose our lies.
Humans are dying and no one cares, Lest the
human was wealthy and left some heirs.
Forced to live in fear? Or, did we choose it?
Are we fighting for our freedom or fighting to
lose it? Surrendering ourselves more and more each
day, to GREED, (we call it NEED), and ignorance.
We create our bliss, oasis, paradise, and we are okay.
Always still, judging others, pointing fingers,
keeping tabs, and taking notes.
BLAMING! BLAMING! BLAMING! Anyone but ourselves!!
Drugging our children, new disease, Amazing Cure-All!
For What? What is right? What is left?
Sadness, heartache, pain, isolation...
Just like we planned.
We give our souls to those who intend to break us.
They want to take us and make us into clones,
Turn us to stone, steal our uniqueness, and
mark our bodies in the depth of our weakness.
We forgot on our own that HE was here, what WE
did, but still we hid, behind that promise, and
continued to sin, continued to lust, to use and
abuse. We made excuses and excuses for our excuses.
What is left? What is right?
When we look deep inside, we come to find and
realize, our hearts don't lie.
If we try too hard to rely on the mind, we will
surely become lost and die, our souls will remain
hollow...
But if we learn to be patient... and...listen
to our hearts, in time, our souls will
follow...
Form:
Damage
03/03/2018
I left that morning like any other ,
At work before dawn.
Hope in my heart as always,
I was seeing my 2nd born.
Early to start, eager to finish,
Not a care in the world.
Light rain falling on ground,
When suddenly I was hurled.
For braking time, or evasive action,
Neither could be taken.
Body smashed on bull bar,
My life it seemed foresaken
Helmet smashed to pieces,
Now Through the air I glided,
Away from the treacherous Triton
With Which my bones collided
Not a care in the world
I woke up on the hard concrete
Stunning silence all around
My crumpled legs my eyes to greet
Not a care in the world
The pain had not yet hit
But soon might thoughts had gathered
And all I thought was ****
I don’t want to be in hospital,
I hope its one night only!
But then the pain was overwhelming
I felt so lost and lonely.
The pain is indescribable,
Legs shattered, hip broken, dislocated.
The pain is unimaginable,
I couldn’t be placated.
In agony I lay there prone,
20 minutes for help to arrive
The ambulance with siren on
Would make sure that I’d survive.
One night in hospital but a dream,
Almost 3 months was my sentence
Operations, infections, more than I can mention
In my mind Id surely paid my penance.
In and out of Hospitals for years
My true suffering had just begun
Pain my new constant companion
Alone abusing drugs for fun
Many years in pity city
Wishing I died at the Tritons hand
Drinking, drugging alone and mad
On my own I’d have to stand
seeing you again reminds me of where i don't wanna be
watching you move listening to how you talk smelling your cologne
all take me back to times that were no good
drinking and drugging and meaningless sex
fighting and shoving until one of us gets hurt
all the anger and mistrust and lonely nights
replay in my head over and over again
we know its over but can't say goodbye
yet as you drove away i began to cry inside
not to the obvious eye thus inside i felt like i was gonnna die
today i woke up with you on my mind again
not as lovers not as friends just as a memory that used to be
romantic nights consisted of a twelve pack some audioslave
smoking cigerette stubbies and counting change
watching pornos helped us both get in the mood
pretending that person on t.v was eachother
to the outside we had it made perfect couple so they said
a real bonnie and clyde relationship we had you and me aganist the world
only when the lights went down so didn't our love
marrinating in hard core drugs and lies and infidelity
a secret we both kept from everyone that was eventually revealed
yet that magnetic attraction will always be there lets just keep it real
i compare the rest to you knowing i gotta break through
our love our life was dangerous and thats no hidden fact
we pushed and pushed eachothers nerve until one would react
those days are gone but your name lives on
i must be strong and carry on
to:what used to be
Form:
AN EVENT THAT CHANGED ME
I checked one morning just to see
Had I parked my car and not hit a tree
I found it in the carport where it should be
No broken headlights and it was dent free
The only problem I faced to my chagrin
How to remove it from the spot it was in
It was not in the position it should have been
It was parked sideways, not end to end
How I got it in there I haven't a clue
I had experienced a blackout from too much brew
Now my dilemma was what must I do
My mind was racing --- I was in a stew
It took thirty minutes to maneuver it out
'Cause a Ford LTD is long and stout
You may be wondering what this is about
There's a story behind without a doubt
It was January eleventh nineteen eighty two
My instinct told me what I needed to do
Tell my boss it's time I was through
Denying my problem with frosted mug brew
I now have been sober for thirty six years
And a relationship with Christ removed my fears
Of losing a career that spanned twenty years
And spend my final days crying a lifetime of tears
Now I tell others how my life is sublime
And how I am living one day at a time
How they don't have to spend every single dime
On drinking or drugging or committing a crime
Come out of denial and freely admit
Their life is unmanageable and they are tired of it
Accept Christ as Savior, there'll be no regret
Eternity will be the best high you can get
27 April 2018
For the contest sponsored by Jamie Pan
REBORN
Out comes the unwanted object of derision,
Conceived after a hasty union along an unlit alley,
By a mother wholly enslaved to syringes
And a father utterly imprisoned by bottles.
The brawls were painfully endless –
Shouting, slapping, kicking, and smashing.
For ages I remained a constant reminder of error –
The mucky bridge linking two wrongs.
I grew up, thickly blanketed by rejection and hate;
And soon found solace hugging the streets –
Gleefully content as the devil’s lieutenant.
Clearly I was marked; born by bad, born for bad.
I delightedly played the black messenger;
Drinking, lying, stealing, drugging, hurting…
I got deeper and deeper into hell’s pit –
A soul entirely spun out of order; surely damned.
I continually ate and drank vile – of all sorts.
But the emptiness…oh, the emptiness…it hurt;
Burning, ripping, searing, slicing, tearing…
The ghostly voice just wouldn’t let me be!
‘Son…you’re much more than this…
Let me in…I can help…just let me in.’
For so long I fought it…yes, I violently fought it:
‘Leave me alone! Get away from me!’
But it kept on; pushing, pressing, pleading…
I couldn’t go on; I was so ablaze within.
Desperate, wretched, broken, and crying – I let it in.
The change was gloriously instant – a transformation
Solidly nailed to peace, purity and hallowed purpose.
At last, I was whole – whole and home.
That night was magic…the night I was reborn.
© Ikenna.C.Igwe, 2012.
The loser,
The one who’s not the greatest chooser.
I’m not proud of the things I’ve done.
It seems the drugs have already won.
When it comes to escapes I have none.
They don’t think I’ve tried.
The truth is I tried so hard
I almost died.
It never used to be this way,
Drugging just to get thru the day.
I was a strait A student,
I never got in trouble,
And never missed a day.
No one knew what happened along the way.
I never got any thing I didn’t fight for.
I guess I was easy to ignore.
I was the one left out.
No one knew what I was truly about.
I tried to tell
But I was still left in hell.
Then the one person who heard died,
My mom, and I never got to say good-bye.
Right after I was kicked out the door.
Now I’m a drugged induced whore.
When I look in the mirror to see who standing in my place
I’m gone without a trace.
The loser,
A kid who fell off the right track
Unable to find her way back.
Theirs others like me.
They just hide it so you can’t see.
I wish I could quit and be free.
I’m reaching out to you,
But I’m a loser so your already threw.
I would like to do so many things,
But theirs a punishment that my life brings.
I live in pain everyday,
Making myself pay.
It’s too late to set things strait.
Living on the edge has landed me in a wedge.
No one sees this is what the world wanted me to be.
After where I’ve been,
I am forced to exist in a world I couldn’t live in
Form:
@2Twenty0
CharlaXTitles
CADD
CharlaXAgainstDrunkDrivers
Puke all over the seat and get some on your dogs head
and a little on the wife’s purse get her good
and Madd at yew so she will take the car keys
and drop them in the piranha pool to keep
the control of the car away from yew.
DO not ever try to drive the car like that again.
Be my friend let the motor idle when the belly
has an idol in the center of your disgusting
fatness leave the driving to the women
or call the rental. Drinking is a disease
of the mind heart liver central being alcoholic yew.
It is now not only whiskey but people drugging
swagging smoking of the left handed Turkish variety
just puffing passing smoking inhaling
like a Clinton Will. Stronger measures now aer
needed to stop the added danger of a high
mucky muck brown frame toker from totaling
the soccer van of Mother. There is station wagons
on the road this mourning with whiskey bumps
all over them the women drivers not exempt
from hitting poles and other cars
and then my friend there is the LAW of Johnny
combined to probable cause. When the police man shines
his light inside the car and sees at least thirteen
empty beer bottles laying in the back seat empty
he has a right to ask ewe iff ewe aer recycling them
or drinking. A road test complete with breathalyzer
please make them touch the nose
never mind the sneezes please.