Long Death wish Poems

It's all frustratingly LeftBrain relativistic,
even nihilistic in its darker 
ruminating 
paranoid about chaotic outcomes form,
said Einstein's post-millennial ghost.

So its all synergetic fractal 4D equivalent SpaceTime,
said Fuller,
in co-arising nondual P = N(NP)/2 (0)-Core response.

Interesting you should...

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I grew up with rural Michigan white red-neck evangelical root systems.
These did not always feed my multicultural self/other liberation of the GLBTQ subclimatic root system
for regeneratively healthy instincts,
yet I learned to survive within this fundamentalist-alien-straight...

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Self destructive wickedness arrested, convicted, and gaoled...

with kidnapping little boy 
ordered to suffer
life sentence without parole.

The deadly scourge of  
one obsessive/compulsive disorder
nearly left me starving to death.

Anorexia nervosa absent bulimia 
nadir of onset 
diagnoses...

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Mine psyche riddled with dybbuk
Thru emerging adulthood awareness awoke
within noggin of average baby boomer bloke
catastrophization toward risk taking I evoke
positive growth experiences throughout vast
number of orbitz around sun never kickstarted,
nor linkedin with potential livingsocial folk,
thus...

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Mine psyche riddled with dybbuk

Thru emerging adulthood awareness awoke
within noggin of average baby boomer bloke
catastrophization toward risk taking I evoke
positive growth experiences throughout vast
number of orbitz around sun never kickstarted,
nor linkedin with potential livingsocial folk,
thus...

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Mine psyche riddled with dybbuk - haint no joke

Thru emerging adulthood awareness awoke
within noggin of average baby boomer bloke
catastrophization toward risk taking I evoke
positive growth experiences throughout vast
number of orbitz around sun never kickstarted
nor linkedin...

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Who among you is brave enough
(or dumb enough)
to take the challenge
Bet your life to beat the odds ...
One out of six
Load the chamber with one bullet,
spin the cylinder, 
spin it good
Place the wager with a...

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Let me tell you a story ...

Johnny Blaze, a stunt motorcyclist, who, to save the life of his sick father, 
a stunt rider also, gives his soul to the devil. But, the devil lies because...

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You are my suffering

Why did you do that? With a poor man? Tell me why? Beautiful rich woman
You like to torture men. A man's life is nothing to you. Just a life, like an animal’s
My...

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I was sitting on the back veranda perusing through a book,
and I could find nothing in it that I should ever overlook.
I’m not certain that the contents would be welcome by my spouse,
for the title...

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But you cant keep this book intact its not allowed 
your soul will not bear it 
do you keep all the prophecies to be a part of the truth 
do you tear out the love...

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Who is responsible 
domestic violence? 
in the home... 

responsible for rape? 
while bullying in schools 
escalates? 

fact anti-social behavior 
begins in the home! 

millions of excuses used 
drugs-sex-mental illness-debt 
alcohol-infidelity-uncompromising 
ass-hole 
why not blame stress!...

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let me be clear. i need no compassion in this life. i've seen myself as a villain ever since i could understand death. exposed at a young age, i dove head first in the pools...

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Today I seek the sun,
it's gentle painless play-
words of winter warmth
spur me on my way,
away from death wish,
daily things gone wrong.

Today I seek the sky -
empyreal blue bowl
that stretches thoughts so high
above an endless flow
of...

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i love the early morning rasp of his voice
the birthmarks and burn scars
midsummer skin
i love the sticky rash of lust
the way a heart ticks until it implodes
the sugar soaked kisses

i do not love the way...

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I seem to have forgotten
the purpose of civilization
we are to animals 
as animals are to a basket of forks
C.J. Jung as the UFO pilot
in "Freud Attacks" a talkie
a flaming romp through the hubs of hell
hI...

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Ever since I experienced being significantly monetarily sidelined...
(how about that topic for a change of pace?)

Yes back to getting walloped, decked
and clubbed courtesy cold hearted brute,
who casually, glad handedly, and royally
flushed out mine tailored pricey...

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Ever since the times of enlightenment obfuscating harmonious balance
Romantic love has taken a back seat in the absurd theatre of minds

My light my mind my empathy bonds and my unconditional passion
have been shrouded in darkness...

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When alive and livingsocial
within webbed wide world
analogous to an emotional hell
I never experienced pomp and circumstances,
and quavers with inconsolable tears
graduation theme song
popularized courtesy Sir Edward Elgar,
thus suicidal ideations no longer relevant
yours truly need not quell
he...

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Some modern folks, when they hear his name,
will roll their eyes and look ashamed,
thinking the cowboy is uncivilized,
with his hats, and guns, and round-up rides.
That somehow they are beyond the stuff,
to good for the wild,...

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“Looking back, I’m ashamed of what I was,
I’m different now, though not without flaws.
Each crest becomes a trough, as we move on,
God slowly steers soul towards a new dawn.”

     ...

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Catch a career criminal,
                            get them to confess
Pin...

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A room filled with sadness 

Standing alone in a room filled with sadness
Photograph smiles in a frame on the shelf
Ashtrays are filled with a death wish still breathing
Lighting another in spite of myself 

A hand...

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Everybody’s destiny is the dirt
Only question is:
Who’s gonna get buried first
Everybody’s last trip is into the earth
Only question is:
Who’s gonna leave away first

Each decision you make
carries a lot of weight
Some seem big, real important ......

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Nights you know I held you
I could never leave you
I just want to tell you
I would never fail you

At thirteen you were telling me to calm down
Selfishly I replied I’m not trying to stay on...

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