Long Bum Poems
Long Bum Poems. Below are the most popular long Bum by PoetrySoup Members. You can search for long Bum poems by poem length and keyword.
Certain people hate the Wii U, they call it a piece of crap.
But I like the game console and I think it got a bum rap.
It's no XBOX One or PS4 but it's not an abomination.
I believe it was good and that's not an exaggeration.
Yes, a few of its games do stink, especially Paper Mario: Color Splash.
When I played that game, I'd get so mad that I wanted to throw it in the trash.
Nintendo released the Switch when they axed the Wii U.
People hated the console and so it was discontinued.
I hated to see the Wii U fail, it has become another Dreamcast.
Certain people hated the Wii U and now it's a thing of the past.
There must be something besides love
Another good topic for a poem
Perhaps I'll write about nature and stuff
And the chilly winds a-blowin'
October in Canada has that nip in the air
That foretells of the season ahead
For those that are into those winter sports
Bet you're can't get it out of your head
Well maybe when I was a very young'un
Snow time meant barrels of fun
But this guy's quite old and crotchety now
Snow means falling on me bum
Can't wait for spring just six months to go
The months can't go by fast enough
Perhaps I'll hibernate just like the bears
Then wake up and brush of the dust
Don't get me wrong, I'm Canadian eh!
It's the law, I'm required to like winter
They could lock me up, throw away the key
It's also against the law to whimper
(sniff!)
© Jack Ellison 2013
Tommy fell off his bike and broke his bum
When he set off to find a new one
Big, tall, or one size fits all
A man he met at the mall,
offered a new bum but for a large sum
Tommy looked here, there, and everywhere
Even the stores where they sold underwear
To venders who had his back
But his bum still had a huge crack!
Something was still wrong, how very unfair
His bum was so noisy it brought him shame
It made weird noises and he got the blame
Tooting, hooting, and squeaking
when anyone started speaking
His bum sounded like a video game
When he discovered he had the loudest,
his talent made Tommy the proudest,
A butt trumpeting bold,
better than a pot gold
His sound-system backside, the best!
Sonic blasts when Tommy bent over
He picked a perfect four-leaf clover
A gas that blew him away
well into St. Paddy’s Day
A blast heard from Dublin to Dover
Once knew a jolly old pirate named Sid
Robbed from the rich and kept it he did
The old rhyme is wrong, Sid was a jerk
He'd push old ladies down in the dirt
Heard that his childhood was really quite sad
Not only that, his breath was quite bad
His shipmates wondered, was Sid really happy
He always seemed strange and really sappy
Perhaps in childhood all the girlies made fun
Had backup lights on his extra large bum
Sid was quite sensitive so in later years
He wore a long coat to cover up his rear
One night his pirate ship lost all it's power
Sid to the rescue, his bum shone for hours
So ever since then, he's a proud son of a gun
An old pirate's tale bout Sidney's big bum
© Jack Ellison 2015
Once knew a jolly old pirate named Sid
Robbed from the rich and kept it he did
The old rhyme is wrong, Sid was a jerk
He'd push old ladies down in the dirt
Heard that his childhood was really quite sad
Not only that, his breath was quite bad
His shipmates wondered, was Sid really happy
He always seemed strange and really sappy
Perhaps in childhood all the girlies made fun
Had backup lights on his extra large bum
Sid was quite sensitive so in later years
He wore a long coat to cover up his rear
One night his pirate ship lost all it's power
Sid to the rescue, his bum shone for hours
So ever since then, he's a proud son of a gun
An old pirate's tale bout Sidney's Big Bum
The actor was acting up
whilst falling down,
then tumbling
like Jack and Jill,
watering his career
with the director’s tears.
Those tears they turned the reel
into a real mistake
that killed the mistaken idea
that the actor couldn’t act.
Oh, he’d act whilst playing
a wall or packing a wallop.
He could play it straight
after emptying a barrel
of hops. He’d monkey
around, sure enough,
but the reel turned
out real good.
The director sobbed,
as did the leading lady,
sober as a titmouse,
lips trembling,
for she had wined
99 times.
But, that hack was good.
She’d had to admit it,
after she was committed.
Had they committed the bum,
the movie wouldn’t have won
and the Oscar
would have gone to the ‘toon.
The director and leading lady
dry their eyes
as the actor wets his whistle
one more time
to charm the public
with his sublime rhetoric.
He bows
over
and regurgitates
over and over
his subliminal vocation.
The ‘toon’s now sarcastic,
bombastically declares
he should have won.
(No actor is humble)
This fumble will cost him,
and accost him.
The winner wipes his lips
and the sweat from his cheeks,
cheekily rips
up the toon’s script.
“Be real…” he says.
Gran and Gramps are BUM BUMS!
Standing beneath bouncy castle with hope and glee
Begging my Gran and Gramps to lift me up to see
The fun and exuberance of children taking a jump
Rolling into the middle like one big kiddie lump
Screams and giggles radiate through the air
Flying shoes, squished candy and knots of long hair
Children in chaos while adults swirl round
Bellowing “Be Careful or you might hit the ground”
I plead with Gran and Gramps in my best squeaky voice
To keep their big promise and give me the choice
To join in the fun and experience all the sites
They renege on their promise and gosh that bites
I crawl into the car with a big scowl on my face
Those two party-poopers are a child’s disgrace!
Riding home in silence and feeling so glum
I give them a nickname “Gran and Gramps Bum Bums”
Waving goodbye and as they drop me to the door
Dumb “Bum Bums” will be lucky to see me anymore!
There must be something besides love
Another good topic for a poem
Perhaps I'll write about nature and stuff
And the chilly winds a-blowin'
November in Canada has that nip in the air
That foretells of the season ahead
For those that are into those winter sports
Bet you're can't get it out of your head
Well maybe when I was a very young'un
Snow time meant barrels of fun
But this guy's quite old and crotchety now
Snow means falling on me bum
Can't wait for spring just six months to go
The months can't go by fast enough
Perhaps I'll hibernate just like the bears
Then wake up and brush of the dust
Don't get me wrong, I'm Canadian eh!
It's the law, I'm required to like winter
They could lock me up, throw away the key
It's also against the law to whimper
(sniff!)
Your very good at destroying
Young girls hearts who are enjoying
The attention that you give
But it is no way to live
When you control their every action
To fulfill the satisfaction
Of the men you share them with
Girls too young to know that this
Is not what love should really be
But they're confused and so lonely
Runaways that have nowhere
To go so you steal their
Innocence and make them think
You saved them all from the brink
Of living cold and alone
Pretending you'll give them a home
And as much care as they need
They're only helping you succeed
To make money every time
Their virtues put on the line
Your the worst scum of them all
Using girls so scared and small
I hope one day your found dead
With a bullet in your head
From someone trying to save
These girls from an early grave
You wake up at night,
Heart filled with fright
Sweat on your brow
But it fades into nothing now
Age in my eyes
Shows how time flies
Time on my hands
And no one understands
Listening to the voices in my head
Doing what I want instead
The beat goes on but the timing is wrong
Who would if thought it take this long
Waiting on myself, but once again I was a no show
Listening to the music within, giving it time to grow
What I once wanted to be
Some of the fragments I can still see
Tell me am I still free
Time passes leading me to here today.
Still searching for the right words to say
Chasing off the memories of times gone by
Dried are the tears that once fell from my eye
One day maybe another to come
I'll have to remember where I come from
Till then I'll just be on my way
Maybe I'll stop and see you again some day