Long Buggery Poems

I’ve always been a prankster and a lover of a joke.
I love to see the puzzled look on an unsuspecting bloke,
when he looks around and lifts his hat - totally confused.
Some take a joke for...

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I’ve got a mate named Marty who went through the school with me,
but like most teenage scholars gave the teachers buggery,
and when it came to penning words, Marty wasn’t very smart,
but put a brush into...

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We’re in a casual conversation on the point of shooting Ducks,
and how they’re not bad on the palate, as long as someone plucks
the flamin’ feathers off the birds, ‘cause by the time they’re bare,
we can’t...

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I often talk about the biggest scare, that I have ever had,
Thinking back I have to say, I acted bloody mad,
And it didn’t get much better when I tried to rectify,
The cause by saving money...

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Cranes fly miles 
During the winter 
Migrating birds 
Hoping to reach their destiny. 

Buzzards along the way 
Look for pigeons 
That seek to feasts and 
long legged buzzards 
search for pigeons 
Inside pigeon holes. 

Parrots...

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Ted Weymouth rang me up to see, if I could do a job he had…
‘His trucks broken down’ he said, so I told Ted ‘I’d be glad
to do a favour for a mate’, he said....

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I could tell Nan’s getting bored with her knitting and crochet,  
and her interest has been waning with the C-W-A.
To think the help I offered had become a huge regret -
I introduced my Nan...

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                         Mind Bound to form, 
     ...

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•to zimmer (v.t.) – to flash brilliantly with apparent blinding insightfulness, suggestive almost of a certain numinosity.**
•** numinous (adj) – of or pertaining to a numen***; arousing elevated or religious feelings.
•*** numen (n) – a...

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Once upon an ancient time, 
in long gone languid days, 
when distant misted myths bechanced
in lovely rhym'ed ways, 
when time was so much freer, 
less allotted to the minute, 
‘twas then the mighty Big Mac...

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What's a matta Rick?
Get tired or sick
Bored of your board?
The chore you adored

Now left for a ghost
No more here to post
Left for all but dead
Did you lose your head?

Did ya fugeddaboutit?
can't get a "roundtuit?"
Left it...

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Nigerians’ most feared President 
And possible Hell-fire President
But rather My Bad Friend
I had to mourn his queer end 
For the Cameroonian Presence in Bakassi
He beautifully dismissed as a heresy:
A subject of panicking intricacy
On his dining...

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