Long Breeches Poems

Shortly after the naming they made arrangements to visit Jessica's home in Nordgrend.  Her father, Raðulfr, sadly, had also succumbed to the last ringing of life's chimes as time's pendulum could no longer be...

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I heard the dreadful Dryad's scream
As axe bit into woody flesh
The sap oozed out as scented cream
My veins stood out in rictal mesh

My wits all scrambled left me quick
My hands and face were full a-sweat
My...

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Influenced by "Sir Gawain and the Green Knight" and "The Rape of the Lock," my goal is to write this completely in iambic meter with (mostly?) rhyming couplets. (Though the intro's meter varies, the main...

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After all is said and done, cliché style
(Forgive me if this does not rhyme, I'm moving
Past rhyme for the sake of rhyme)
You will have gone away rich and returned for more
Because you thought you knew...

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With trembling heart, as an attempt I made 
To leap across, he woke up with a start, 
The sword fell from his lap with a sharp clang, 
A terrifying scream when made me jump, 
I...

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An old gal applied to join Mensa
Gee she couldn’t be any denser
She went in the wrong door
On the thirty third floor
And there she enrolled as a fencer

When attending her first fencing class
A man scored a...

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My sad story lacks glory, it's one of a kind,
I got tossed, lost and frightened, now I'm losing my mind.
After all it is Christmas, for one wish I care - 
To get back with my...

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Oh wow just look at that tower. It is the tower of towels. They are in a queue waiting for the dryer today. The drier is having a manicure so they will all have to...

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Tonight is for reflection.
Not the kind found in a mirror.  
Which of course I have none.  Mores the pity.  I would love to see how splendid I look 
in my new shirt...

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Too many questions, way too few answers
Why would an egg wear blue pants, sir? And
Wherefore his fall? Perchance he was struck with a lance, sir 
   Or could it be he keeled over...

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I comport myself with quiet pridefulness,
plus intellectual whimsy
aware that "FAKE" pretentiousness,
could be mistaken foreign egotistical vitae
furthering, feathering and figuratively
undermining jestingly, 

poetically, and zealously
oozing, gushing, bubbling over
with faux snobbish suave re:
pulse sieve literary fatuous
haughtiness, and ludicrous...

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I’ve always been restless since I was a kid,
to settle near drives me insane.
I’ll just throw together the best that I can
what I own and be gone again.

Boxes long packed I had stacked in a...

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Over the horizon is heard the sputtering engine of an unusual bird.
Trailing a billowing plume of smoke, it looked so pathetically absurd!
Coming into view was an old Curtiss Jenny of World War One fame.
Used only...

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poetically, and zealously
oozing, gushing, bubbling over
with faux snobbish suave re:
pulse sieve literary fatuous
haughtiness, and ludicrous narcissistic pre
ning all the while chuckling to me

self, and indifferent if
some anonymous browser
with Dutchman's breeches rolled up
upon cresting wave over...

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In the garden populated with flowers, red and budded,
Resort robins birds, with inflated fluffy feathers. 
They fall in waves between the grass gushing in green 
And the impetus of a small purifying pinkish river. 
...

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Many years ago,
Before yours or my time,
When the only way to
Travel to and fro
Was not with automobiles,
Or cars or trains,
Or even planes. 
But with a horse or a donkey.
This happened in the villages 
In Greece,...

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To and fro a person goes
Through life with its sunshine's blows
Sweeping him from beneath
A magic carpet surfing underneath
his feet of guidance
Towards the road of happiness
The sun shines upon his face
Whilst the moon's lace
approaches the sun...

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Across the roaring 40’s
I sail
I fly
She’s in a hurry
To reach out
That Southern land
Like a horse
That knows the way home
She bucks
She sways
Her cloth
Slides across the wind
Hell or high
I will make sure
We harbour
The leeward side
And the Jack...

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The eerie surreal countenance of the moon
Illuminates mysterious dune
The pupils of her eyes are the visage of that moon
In them there is wonder and fury of raging typhoon

In those eyes my soul will swim
With spirit...

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Sonnet 19

        Have you ever noticed
           the gentle tone
         ...

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I have an idea for some verse,
   But cannot get it down
With rhythmic phrases, just so terse-
   This causes me to frown;

There are two subjects, worlds apart,
   'Tis they...

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A spider drank cider and was legless at breakfast 
Now this placid arachnid with a shoddy wee body
Asked weevils so evil if they each had a needle
Could they just for a joke smoke while they...

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BLUEBERRY BOAT

I’m going to sea in a blueberry boat
With cellophane sails on cinnamon mast
It could be cold so I’ll take a coat
And In case of a leak some Elastoplast

We shall sail on seas of blueberry...

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Night goes wrong gone by gone
Eleven sharpened by bell tolls
Last wipes failed in scrambled line
Shake the grip till bleached
Squeezing of faith blows a worship dirt

Night closes sins by wrong summon
Twelve pointed by curved hands
Silence gasped...

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Joseph Pujol, Flatulist
1/6/1857 - 8/8/1945

He started working as a baker
And ended up being the same
But for nearly thirty years he 
Enjoyed international fame.
Using his natural talent
For quite a long while
He entertained the elite 
In his...

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