The Mystery of Humpty Dumpty
Too many questions, way too few answers
Why would an egg wear blue pants, sir? And
Wherefore his fall? Perchance he was struck with a lance, sir
Or could it be he keeled over from cancer?
But these answers are foolish, silly as can be
Let us seek precision, yea clarity -- just you and me
First let us consider Humpty's engimatic egghood
Whence he came, his origins, his neighborhood.
Humpty hailed, sure, from the finest of breeding's nests
His pedigree indubitably the crest of the West
Why else would "King's Men" strive to aid him so?
Inconceivable then, that he be hatched not from Royal Dough
And yet, and yet -- that last name strikes hard at this theory
The name "Dumpty" denoting 'dumpy,' connoting 'weary'
The overall effect on eyes perspicacious, quite bleary
A name bestowing tidings negative -- never cheery
So where does that leave us, O intrepid fellow-seeker?
Let us push past the thorns and the thistles, those sticklers
That wreak havoc on curiosity so fragile as it peeks
Back into the matter of Humpty's breeches, heretofore piqued
Observing their color oft rendered blue
Though on occasion brown or purple, and even striped too
--Why, friend, I think I've got it, by Jove!
The answer to Humpty's mystery, for which we mightily strove
Brown is an outlier, not worthy of consideration
Purple represents Royalty, the Crown's Coronation
But Blue, validly, veritably, and verifiably, is a color so True
The King's Man who wears it can fend off every attempt at a coup!
July 01, 2018
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