Long Biff Poems

Believe me,
                                 ...

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Poem 9/11

Believe me,
Just watching my TV
News Flash!! Skyjack! 
New York City Centre,Jet Crash. 
Check that.
News Call,Broadcast stall. 
Drop the headlines!! 
This is the new line 
Look up on the Skyline   
Flash,Bash,Crash 
Right on...

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- Inspired by ‘Tubby Makes a Mistake‘ by Enid Blyton in ‘The Cuckoo in the Clock and other stories.’

When night falls,
toys come out to play
While we slumber and snore
the night away.

Now somewhere on the window...

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Biff, the oboist


2 cups of pureed shrimp
1 cup of chopped turkey bacon
4 cups of flour (self rising)
1/4 cups of coconut flakes
3/4 cups of green onion
3 T celery seeds (toasted)
2 T sesame seeds (toasted)
5 Tablespoons of...

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I see the raging fire in your
eyes,
the heart screams out loud the brain cells terpsichore 
in the rhythm of life.

See the sparkle instead of haze that covers your being. 
see the best in you 
that...

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One sunny day at the central zoo
Biff the gorilla grabbed the zoo keepers key
Before the employees had even a clue
Went and set all the animals free

Started out on Monkey Island
With the Orangutans and Chimpanzees
With the...

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Call me clean stamp, 
I burn my brand on the devil with holiness. 
yea, I said it and it remains.  Watch the smoke sizzle 
to a sign that says "Fear God". Biff. Low and...

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When I am old I shall be an acrobat Granny Fee said.
People will cheer and stomp their feet at me
The clapping will be thunderous
I may join Barnum and Bailey’s right now

I think they went out...

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I feel the need to say a real loud poem, 
A poem full of WAILS!! HOWLS!! and YELPS!!
It doesn’t need to be about anything at all,
But if it is then I guess that that helps.

AAAARR!!...

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Coronavirus, here to stay; 
             Rather unfortunate to say.
Lives have changed; things aren't the same.
        Crowding...

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One legged evil brownie with a lopsided top hat
Was tired of crab legged crone thinking she was all that
Her feather and sword gave her instant jurisdiction
Her thought her followers fell under some addiction.

Her flag-waving ways...

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Biff Gets His Fill

By Elton Camp

Sue, Biff’s wife, simply loved her dog
Though he was filthy as a rooting hog

To keep Fido outside she didn’t try
The house became as dirty as a sty

He took a nap...

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Darkness steals the day’s fading sunlight
as the moon opens his bright eye above.
Stars begin to spray the ebony night  
that grips the still earth like a glove.

Streetlight burns through curtained window 
casting shadows along...

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Basher used to fight with all his might
Until he died, "poor thing".
He boxed four rounds and hit the ground
After taking one on the chin

From a boxer called Biff
Who made short thrift
Of anyone that he fought
He...

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Searching I was for a good riff,
Maybe like in 'Locomotive Breath',
So I called up my old pal Biff
But a cold, he had caught a death.

Now with Biff down and out,
I was left to go it...

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The Wireless Signal

By Elton Camp

Biff had belonged to the mob most of his life
It provided great income for him and his wife

The feds had been making threatening noise
He felt safe in his house, protected by...

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Had free verse been particular back then-

when storylines equipped by vivid spells,

ajudged to having made attempt prevails;

my hafting to - was just a case of when.

Acknowledge it a threat to self attain

an attitude towards the...

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The Fall of the Onomatopoeian Empire

By Elton Camp

Onomatopoeia is a literary device
Appeal to the senses is quite nice

The comics often show us how
By using biff and bang and pow

The telephone loudly does ring
The cash register...

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The problem is, Priscilla grew up 
in a penthouse having parties while 
Biff came of age under a bridge

fighting other trolls, he remembers.
When Pris calls his office and says 
we're having guests tonight

the chasm in...

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intelligence over the innocence
                               ...

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