Long Berk Poems

Once in a time a story begins
So many believe and some repent
People do live in a kind of teases
But a few of them do live of hunt
        ...

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Sam is a novice gardener who stamps on all ants
He doesn't like them near or crawling on his plants
Their Queen was angry and wanted revenge
For the ones that had fallen she wanted to avenge.

They planned...

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Don’t see it lady May….

 

Dark demon from the nether world,

From into-outer space was hurled,

And came by Dumbo jet,

He came to prey on lady May,

An older shiela, ninety say,

Who liked dem toy boys just a...

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I moved up on the outside to pass Bold Eclipse 
when this poncy young jockey bloke puckered his lips. 
Well I kicked well away and I picked up the pace 
and a divot of turf...

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Birdsong wakens me at the crack of dawn
I try hard to get back to sleep until the early morn

Heading for the bathroom I ‘tinkle’ on the loo
On rousing I think its something that most people...

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My tech of nology is some what limited
Even when I try to get things printed
But to transfer pictures is testing me
Failed to connect keeps harrassing me

Tech of nology is a crazy puzzle
Has tied my mind...

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An old man sat thinking
Oh what shall I do
I really could do
With a woman or two!
The younger the better
Or three in a bed
Why are these thoughts
Going round in my head
But his looks were not pleasant
His...

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Pathological liars lie to hide behind the lie, 
terrified of their honest truth becoming realized
which they hide in their fragile mind kept captive 'til they die 
as they seek attention through misdirection mastered over time...

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Smashed up against the wall it 
Shat ter ed
 	in     
to
 tin
y
 pi ec es.  
My m
i
n d 
is splintered  broken, 
never to be put back together again 
S...

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I cry all night thinking about me and my concern.
How could you not know , that my soul is about to burn.
Thanks is not a word that is compatible.
Gimme a chance , i will prove...

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I told you that it will never work
I'm not willing to loose everything you berk
Eventually, someone will tell our loved ones
Then all we had will be destroyed and we’ll be undone

How could you say I’m...

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... The pen is mightier than the sword ...


The poet knight went off to war
To prove his valor true.
Sir Arthur Berk, the troubadour,
Knew he had much to do

For he had found a greater sword
To strike...

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Went to get my banana as I headed for the door
It had been on the table that much I know for sure
Last night I put it ready to take with me to work
Now it has...

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You're her friend who wasn’t there 
likes to get involved and share
sucking up and showing care
be a brainwashed silly mare

Loyal showing her support 
do her work file reports
couldn’t help her ass in court
weren’t a witness...

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What say you when a pig bathe in a muddy muck?
When he rolls merrily like 'tis panacea to his strain?
Don't you gawk at the amazing shuck
Could be to you 'tis a flaunt to his inert...

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Two Nuns travel through Europe by car
Guided by the heavens North Star
Transylvania they reach
Hymn singing they preach
Not realizing they have come so far

At a busy junction they now stop
The red light is about to colour...

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Zerk was a lurking berserk
who lived in the murky-murk of the cirque 
by the smirking Turk 
Zerk was irking a-jerkin’ and a draught of perkin
Zerk was a-joying his shirker’s approach towards work
Zerk was a-starking, a-barking,...

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Santa omitted to visit our town 
Christmas Day was so sad ; all the kiddies let down .
Parents were livid and they all could remember
That letters were sent in early November .
No dolls prams or...

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A cocky engineer on his way home
Spotting his boss standing alone
Perplexed and confused
Totally bemused
His groans soon turned to moans

I'm trying to make this thing work
But I'm starting to feel like a berk
I need this copied...

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For the usual life to digress-
From the norm to the average.
Standard has to meet it's distress,
Not considering any group or age.

Wonder is unusual to think of,
Living is nothing compulsive,
And the virus palliative isn't thereof
To some,...

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I don't need to figure it out
I know exactly what i'm about
why i'm here? what i'm for?
Even all the lives i've lived before.
My purpose in life doesn't exist
don't overplan, life's easy to miss
go at a...

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Just shut up and get a life,
I'm not like you, I've a reason to live ya,
if you weren't a berk you'd have a wife,
but with berks no one gives a....

change your tactic you're a spastic
loopy...

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A mouse, a bird and a sausage did all live very gay,
they all lived very happily and worked in each owns way.

The job of the mouse was to carry water, the sausage did cook the...

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whaffor bertie ...YOU MUST???

Moraly bankrupt bloody berk,
rancid rabid jabbering jerk,
grabbing dollars for of his perk,
from fat jabba of the west coast hut,
dirty stinking greedy but,
propiety is observed,
on her ugly big asses butt,
Tory governments must serve,
bribe...

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I`VE BEEN READINGS LIMERICKS BY JAN,
TO EMULATE THE BEST THAT I CAN.
SHE CAN WRITE ABOUT POOH,
STICKY STUFF AND GOO.
WITH THE SAME SENSE OF HUMOUR AS A MAN.

NOW I WILL HAVE TO TELL YOU ABOUT DIRK,
ALWAYS...

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