Long Arses Poems

Someone who knows
Said You were an old ancient Tree,
But at the time, it didn’t really matter, 
Or seem important to me.
I knew You only for a very short time 
and just a little…
You see.
Your transparent...

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I've friends who sell drugs, 
and they are driving fast cars.
Friends who are into money heists
and they have mansions and fleets of super Cars,
I've a cousin smuggling diamond and gold, 
and he is flying all...

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"Land's End"

All at once & with such Very Great Flair ~
So's no-one would notice what'd really taken Place~
SeaWolf & his Wench grabbed a wild Notion from thin Sea Air~
That with which they'd figured nary a...

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Losing with Grace.....

Baseball players know how to play
their game and move on.
When they lose, they lose.
They don't talk of collusion, or who
stole bases and worse..
To call in the Fed to play the game of Farcical Illusions,
They...

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Lenny was 30 and still living with his old cheese, everyone called, Lenny’s mum.
She was always on his Cadbury Snack to go find a trouble and strife for a chum.
“Geez, leave off mum, I’ve been...

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AT THE BEYOND 

It is here at the point
Where no life exists
Where shadows lurk
Life is made
While Creation does nothing
But watch itself in
A hole that never ends

Ether dances and joke at
The beginnings of dust 
As we...

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I'm in me bath here, with a box of red cheer, 
yeah a box of red cheer, beer's too bloody dear.
Me mind's wanderin twixt big tits and riches, 
bein able to scratch at what itches,...

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An Ancient crazy Ox, 
Once had a whacking job,
Breaking on the dance floor,
One too many holes to show!
 
A sleepy grizzly bear on four,
Drinking ale with a drunkard 
boar,
On board a rocking Boat with 
one...

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why am I so different?  
                            ...

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One day Gaia was doodling
with sharp twig, on scribbly gum.
"Note to Self"
These big-brained bipeds
are getting far too cocky for their britches.
All the dumb-arses 
are becoming smarty-pants.
These bloody bipeds are building
bloody big Babel information towers 
all...

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You think you enjoy the radical,
flaming in the gas jets of astral fumes, 
spinning in the ocular midnight of a rabid dogs dream,
yet, I think you know, NOTHING is as it seems.

An all too thorough...

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ACME TIRE FACTORY
The system was so slow to use and the boss was always on our back
Hurry hurry get your fingers out this job depends on you
I’ll fire your sorry arses if you go any...

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By 12

By 12 I was
fully grown. My height was 
the envy of 
the short arses in 
my classes. I wasn’t a 
porker like 
some ... I was 
spared fat jokes. My level of 
pituitary activity...

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Generations of warmongers spew their lies
outward into the waiting abyss of greed
as the adult throng of drones 
buzz the factories and the farmlands, 
carpenter ants wasting the bounty of mother earth.

And we ..children of the...

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               ~POINT THE FINGER AT YOUR CHEST~





        What have you done lately,
  ...

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Black spot on roses and fingerless mittens
Green stinging nettles and flea ridden kittens
All creepy crawlies and insects with wings
These are a few of my un-favourite things

When my back aches
When my head spins
When I’m fighting mad
I...

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What if, we are all being lied to
What if, all the facts are untrue
What if, they just want to control you
What, if it's true, do you do?

What if, when we had the plandemic
What if, it...

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The Big Boss
My manager is a locust brain
He doesn’t know what he’s doing

My manager is a locust brain
The job is kaos when he’s in charge here

My manager is a locust brain
Production takes a dip under...

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Junior school

Years gone by and we are all still fools 
For the silly things we laughed at school
Farting and burping and breaking the rules
Making large bubble gum circles whilst swimming in the local pool
Playing tennis...

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Fifty years ago this July
  Three American astronauts put the lie to 'Why'
On the surface of the Moon they made a pinpoint landing
  Primitive technological devices notwithstanding

We thought the era of space exploration...

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sitting here like a moron in an old people's home,
they think i dont know where they've put me and my phone.

silly arses are searching my home for any hidden money .....you see
they won't find a...

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This is the 21st Century
Where it seems the masses
Are still placed on this Earth
To serve the upper classes,
Feed their acquisitive appetites 
Wipe their delicate arses,
And all in all perpetuate
That longest of running farces,
Respect for so...

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At Austerlitz I two nations vanquished;
making me historically distinguished.
At Marengo I had Austria subdued;
then I was to honour undoubtedly glued.
At the Pyramids, Mamluks kissed the sands;
then like a French Pharaoh I annexed their lands.
At Jena-Auerstadt,...

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